Not in a good space

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

It's like a feeling just bubbling up to the surface. It's panicky and disgusting and I dont' know what to do with it. There's no thoughts associated with it. It's a feeling. A really gross one. I called the Suicide Call Back service. I didn't find them helpful. What do you do? What helps you?

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hi Simon, sorry for the tardy reply, and your absence was noted, but always ok whenever anyone feels they need a break. Tayla had a break too. Always good to just take time out for ourselves when we need. I hope you both found it helpful for your mental health, and great to see you back. Any time anyone wants to chat about anything, please feel this is a safe and welcoming space to share xx

[Guest_4643]

Thanks Katy and Simon. Hope you're both well too. I'm struggling but I guess I'll be okay, no need to worry about me, take care both of you and everyone else on the thread too.

Tayla

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hey CS 🙂

Loooooong day here! Hope yours treated you gently x

Do you have much longer to go on the course? Is it over a set period, or? It sounds like a great resource either way.

Interesting you know a lot about your psych lol. I've seen mine for a decade and she's probably talked about herself minimally during one session, and that was relative to my particular circumstance at the time. If you're only seeing yours every 2/3 months, you'd want to be maximising your time with them. Do you have the option of seeing someone else? Or do you think you'd like to stick with her?

An acquaintance has told me about a local group called GROW. Apparently they're everywhere, kind of like AA, but for mental health. Have you heard of them at all? There is a meeting on tomorrow, and I'd kind of like to go along for a look. But also, I have anxiety, and even going to a group meeting, about anxiety, with other people with anxiety, makes me anxious hahhhahahahah oh dear

BTW I'm NOT a talker. I'm a little mouse. That's probably why I apologised for talking so much. It's unnatural to me lol. So I think we'd get along great IRL. You could fill up all the awkward silence, while I nod and smile 🙂

Katy x

[smallwolf]

Hi Katy,

I have heard of GROW - my dad went to one a group in his local area a couple of times. I cannot really comment on it because dad had a couple of issues, but these might also just something at his local group - he is also hard of hearing which made things problematic. At the same time it was recommended to him to try out. See also...

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/treatments-health-professionals-and-therapies/grow-meetings

Tim

[calmseeker]

Evening Katy,

Sounds like you may sleep like a baby since your day have been full and long. You seems to have a pretty full diary with uni, yoga, house, dog, bb, general life and all the other things I probably don't know about.

I cant work out why it is that my therapist tells me so much about her life, maybe for examples or something I don't know, but I feel she knows only the basics about me! I need to change my GP and Psychologist but I just find it so overwhelming starting again. They both are not a great fit for me. I know I need to do this to get where I want to be but for now I have shoved it on the to do list. The CBT course has about 2 weeks to go and I am sure I will go over it a few more times. It was about 12 weeks in duration. There have been no light bulb moments or anything but its been useful in some ways and interesting.

I am going to google GROW after I post this, it sounds interesting and something I could possibly go to. I am not so great in groups either, I prefer one on one. Too bad we live SO FAR apart as I would come with you to the meeting. Even though I am a talk-a-holic I am no social butterfly that's for sure. I keep to myself mostly and have very few friends but the handful I do have (well I would say 3) are awesome humans. All of them live in different states than I do so its all phone communication. Apart from my partner and daughter I don't have anything to do with anyone in person at all. I don't mind this, I really like my own company - all good as long as I keep occupied so I don't overthink.

I have absolutely no doubt at all that we would get along perfectly IRL. You are smart and kind so that ticks my criteria for friendship, nothing else needed! I find quiet people extremely interesting anyway, and they are usually very insightful. Most people tell me I am 'comfortable' to be around, I think I am a fairly gentle person even if I do talk too much 🙂

I have been wanting to pick your brain about yoga, but I will come back and do that at another time as I think my energy quota for the day is drying up also.

Have a peaceful night Katy xo

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy,

Just checking that you're OK? You're probably busy with Uni and tired, but just wanted to come by and say hello hope all is well. xx

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Yeah, no, not really ok 😞

I want to crawl into bed, and I want the world to go away. I feel like such a pathetic, inadequate human being, and i just don't want to do life any more.

[Sophie_M]

Hi Katy,

We're so sorry to hear how low you're feeling right now. We want you to know you're not alone and there is always someone ready to help. It sounds as though you might be reaching crisis point, in which case we urge you to call Lifeline on 13 11 14 or the Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467.

If you feel like your in immediate danger then this is an emergency and you should call 000 right away.

When you feel up to it we'd love to hear how your journey's going.

[Hanna3]

Hi dear Katy,

Aw girl you were doing so well - what's caused this to happen? I am so sorry you're down...

We'll just sit here with you if you like - Sam's here too - sending you fluffy furry warm gentle puppy hugs. You can talk or we'll just keep checking in on you... You know there's so many people here who care about you dear one.

So we're thinking of you and we'll come back and check on you and if you don't want to talk that's fine we'll just sit a while here and be with you... gentle sweet hugs ok? oooxxx

[Hanna3]

And no, you're not pathetic or inadequate, you are a brave, bright lady who has been through some awful losses, you are permitted your bad days OK? - but don't, don't put yourself down. You're a lovely sweet person and people care about you a lot. Hugs from us both here, be kind to yourself dear lady. oooxxx