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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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randomxx Would really appreciate peoples thoughts on a housing situation !
  • replies: 55

Hi to all.lt's an unbelievable time in life to find myself stuck in this position, just don't know how to look at it, or what to do about with it, if l can anything at all. Problem is, at almost 60, yeah l've mixed up details in other threads just a ... View more

Hi to all.lt's an unbelievable time in life to find myself stuck in this position, just don't know how to look at it, or what to do about with it, if l can anything at all. Problem is, at almost 60, yeah l've mixed up details in other threads just a bit concerned some l know may also be here and haven't wanted any connection here that l might know, butttt, yep.Thing is l didn't get anything out of my last house, the people l went into the property with as it was a big place, went broke.Well , sort of lucky although maybe a curse , not sure anymore but l do still have a 1ac country property, 18yrs now, from back when l was married.l can't work anymore for mh reasons but if l took care l can survive until l can get the pension- living at the 1ac place- it only has a small over nighter atm but l could extend and it'd come up quite nice . Problem is, it's in a ting town, 30mins to the main town which is a really nice place and there's also a couple of tiny ones in between before that main buttttt, out where this place is, is tiny and out on it's own .l always planned selling it about now but problems are now that for 1, even if it did sell, it's just a cheap little country block it'd only be a good deposit on something closer in- but circumstances now that'd mean a new mortgage and l'd have to keep working too, don't think l could stomach either of those especially the stress in trying to make it happen.2nd thing highly possible it doesn't even sell anyway. l know l'm lucky to at least have it and all , with the housing crisis and so many in worser positions , l just never dreamed l'd be living on it though and honestly, just don't know but it looks like l might be forced to.l grew up in the city and have lived in some of the nicest places in the country but to have to settle on this place out there now- look the property itself is a really cute block and in a nice little back street- if l could put it on a truck to somewhere else it'd be really nice - but this town. rx

Guest_21750272 Moving to a new place and regretting my life decisions
  • replies: 2

Don’t really know how to word this well but I’ve recently moved to a new place and I wish I could move back to what I am familiar with being closer to family. Also struggling with my past life decisions, financial and having no friends after moving. ... View more

Don’t really know how to word this well but I’ve recently moved to a new place and I wish I could move back to what I am familiar with being closer to family. Also struggling with my past life decisions, financial and having no friends after moving. I guess just wanting some advice and what others have done to help, just feels like nothings going right as I get older and I just feel stuck:(

Earth Girl What to do when people say things like this
  • replies: 3

My parents say really racist things. My Mum often says things like "Those Asian people" "A police officer was chasing an Asian man because... and then the Asian man..." "There's this Asian woman on this show who I don't really trust... I think it mig... View more

My parents say really racist things. My Mum often says things like "Those Asian people" "A police officer was chasing an Asian man because... and then the Asian man..." "There's this Asian woman on this show who I don't really trust... I think it might partly be because she is Asian" "I don't like saying certain sayings like you're welcome because it's very American" "I don't like annoying American accents." (She once also impersonated the way Asian people speak, and she was mumbling when she did it and not even saying any words). When I was little, since my parents kept talking about how evil Americans are, I thought they must have been really mean people. My Mum was reading us a picture book, and she said, "Typical Americans, they don't know how to draw." About 5 years ago I think it was, I asked her why she didn't like Americans and she said, "Because they think they are better than us!" I said most of them probably don't think that and she went "Oh yes they do!" She also says things like "There was a very nice black man at... today" and the other day she said, "Dad and I went for a walk, and there were two men there and one of them was black." When she finished the story, I asked what him being black had to do with anything and she said that she was just talking about his appearance (even though there was no need to). I mean, if I was asking what someone looked like because I was trying to find them then it would be okay to say, "They are tall, have dark skin, etc.", but she'll say that people are black or Asian when there's literally no need to. My Dad was watching a show and he said "Wow, she's dark haha." Why do they feel the need to say these things!? I've tried to explain to them that there's no need to say these things and that every culture has nice and not nice people in them and that I've known lots of really nice people who are Asian. But they just get annoyed with me and my Mum says "Fine, I just won't talk to you about this sort of thing then" and I said Well, I've told you before that I don't want to hear it! My Mum has also told me that she doesn't think that I should worry about being politically correct because it's a waste of time. I can't cut my parents out for many reasons, but even if I could, they would make me feel bad and say, "We may not be perfect." Everyone thinks they are so nice, but they have no idea how temperamental they are, and they act very differently outside than they often do inside the house.

gurindjiwoman How can I create new connections?
  • replies: 1

Good Afternoon I am approaching 28 years of age, and I can say with absolute confidence that I am incredibly lonely. I have previously befriended people who were secretly jealous of me, or could not stand me. People have lied and gossiped about me to... View more

Good Afternoon I am approaching 28 years of age, and I can say with absolute confidence that I am incredibly lonely. I have previously befriended people who were secretly jealous of me, or could not stand me. People have lied and gossiped about me to other people, which has affected who I became friends with in the past. I have had to deal with adults living with undiagnosed narcissistic personality disorder who wanted to do nothing but exert control over my life, with their "flying monkeys" enabling this. There are even people who I bump into often in public who pretend that I am not there. Most of these people are people who I have never spoken a word to, but, my gut instinct tells me that they have heard something negative about me, based on my previous interactions with mutuals. I spend most of my time with my family, but as I am getting older, I am facing an exorbitant amount of pressure to act neurotypical... when I am not. I feel like I do not stand a chance at forming healthy relationships with anyone. I am now hesitant to put myself out there. I would describe myself as someone who is polite, gentle, keeps to herself, looks after herself, is quite intelligent, and is genuinely confident with who I am/who I am becoming. I am also a university student who has goals in place for her future. I am currently seeking psychiatry in the public mental health system, but the problem that I am experiencing here is that psychiatrists rotate every six months to a year. I cannot afford to seek psychiatry via a private practice. I live with autism (neurodevelopmental disorder), schizophrenia (mental health condition) and postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome (POTS) (chronic illness).

Guest_35370081 Angered
  • replies: 1

My wife an i have been happily married for 18 yrs we have had the odd argument but nothing major recently i had a birthday which my wife threw a surprise party which i really enjoyed 2 days later idestroyed Xmas for my wife, we had a heated argument ... View more

My wife an i have been happily married for 18 yrs we have had the odd argument but nothing major recently i had a birthday which my wife threw a surprise party which i really enjoyed 2 days later idestroyed Xmas for my wife, we had a heated argument 2 days before Xmas, I lost my cool and pushed her not meaning harm, but she feel over, I accepted full blame and apologised profusely, she say she's fine and we're fine, but I know we're not the love has left her, I am afraid I have broken the one thing in this world that means anything to me. I am so ashamed and hate myself for what I have done to her, she won't talk about the future in depth. Is it over?

Guest_09781325 That time of year?
  • replies: 3

Hi, posting as I don’t know what to do or where to turn. I’ve suffered depression most of my life but had been doing well lately. This week everything feels like it used to, and due to recent (past few months) false allegations about me and cyber bul... View more

Hi, posting as I don’t know what to do or where to turn. I’ve suffered depression most of my life but had been doing well lately. This week everything feels like it used to, and due to recent (past few months) false allegations about me and cyber bullying I have only a few friends who are too busy to talk to me. I think social media have a false else of people in my life. It’s my 40th birthday tomorrow so I don’t know if it’s just this combined with Christmas, nothing has happened but I can’t pull myself up & feel like I’m falling deeper into a black hole

booga suddenly dont feel like talking to anyone
  • replies: 2

all of a sudden, i just dont want to talk. just like, in general. even over text. i love my best friend and theyre one of my favorite people, but suddenly i just,, dont want to talk to them. its not that we're growing apart, they might be getting a c... View more

all of a sudden, i just dont want to talk. just like, in general. even over text. i love my best friend and theyre one of my favorite people, but suddenly i just,, dont want to talk to them. its not that we're growing apart, they might be getting a computer tomorrow so we can play games together, and its not like i dont like them. i just dont feel like talking. i dont know whats wrong with me and i feel guilty about it

Quilter57 Getting over depression inertia
  • replies: 2

I have had depression for years. It is being treated with meds and lifestyle changes. I have been suicidal in the past. I also have AUD and am on medication for it. Christmas was horrible this year due to estrangement from my DIL. I can't say anythin... View more

I have had depression for years. It is being treated with meds and lifestyle changes. I have been suicidal in the past. I also have AUD and am on medication for it. Christmas was horrible this year due to estrangement from my DIL. I can't say anything to family cos my daughter bent over backwards to make it nice for us. I appreciate that. I had been doing well , but have fallen in a heap. No motivation, don't care about anything, exhausted just playing games on my phone. There are things I'd like to do but can't push myself. Hubby and I are not talking. We have a good marriage, but he is very angry with DIL and I want to reconcile. So I don't know what to do. I know the medication im on exacerbate depression and suicidal ideation so going to see my Dr on Jan 8th.

Guest_10343 Taking small steps when depression makes everything feel heavy
  • replies: 4

Hi everyone,I’ve been reading through a lot of the posts here and finally felt ready to share something of my own. Depression has been part of my life for a while now, and lately it feels less like intense sadness and more like a constant heaviness a... View more

Hi everyone,I’ve been reading through a lot of the posts here and finally felt ready to share something of my own. Depression has been part of my life for a while now, and lately it feels less like intense sadness and more like a constant heaviness and lack of energy. Even simple things, getting out of bed, replying to messages, taking care of myself, can feel overwhelming. Some days I don’t feel “bad enough” to justify how hard things feel, which then just adds guilt on top of everything else. I know logically that depression doesn’t always have a clear reason, but emotionally it’s hard not to question myself. One thing I’ve been slowly trying is breaking help into smaller pieces. Sometimes that’s just talking things through online rather than face to face, or checking in briefly with a GP or mental health professional when I don’t feel up to a full appointment. I’ve used a couple of telehealth services like Hola Health Beyond blue, abby and while it didn’t fix everything, it did make reaching out feel a bit less daunting on low days. What I’m still struggling with is consistency, keeping up routines and self-care when motivation is basically non-existent. I wanted to ask:What small things have helped you when depression feels flat and draining rather than intense?How do you get yourself started when everything feels like too much?Has anyone else found low-pressure ways of reaching out for support helpful?Thanks for reading. Just being able to write this out already feels like a small step.Sending strength to anyone else who’s having a hard time right now.

indigo22 Following the breadcrumbs to improve mental health
  • replies: 202

Hi everyone, The last few months have been somewhat confusing as I have discovered more about my mental / physical health and how it has all been connected. I had not put the pieces together, I am not sure why, it seems so obvious now. I have dealt w... View more

Hi everyone, The last few months have been somewhat confusing as I have discovered more about my mental / physical health and how it has all been connected. I had not put the pieces together, I am not sure why, it seems so obvious now. I have dealt with Dysthymia since about 12 and Major Depression since about 14 but was not diagnosed until my 40s and had no idea that had been the problem all along. I knew I wasn't like everyone else but thought I was just born that way. Back then mental health was not a subject that was openly discussed and the signs mostly went unrecognised and untreated. I had about 10 years of talk therapy with a social worker that helped immensely. I have had a sensitive digestive system for a good portion of my life, not so much that I sought treatment, just things like indigestion with certain foods, bloating and the like. I suppose I thought everyone had those types of issues. I have also had nervous system reactions over the past 15 years, like involuntary shaking in certain situations, that I had put down to getting older and being less resilient having been through a lot of difficult challenges. I have been seeing a psychotherapist who also does somatic work (turns out you were right mmmekitty, I did need some more help). The first session of somatic work, in this case EFT (tapping), brought up a deep and long standing belief that I did not deserve to be helped. The emotions were buried so deep that I was not even aware of them. After that session things went haywire physically for a few days and took some weeks to start to settle. Being the type of person who needs to have an understanding of what is happening and why, I have been reading many books on the symptoms I have had. That is when I began to join the dots about how interconnected by mental and physical health actually were. It has required a lot of processing on my part, and an acknowledgement of what I have been consciously unaware of, but it has been necessary to finding a way forward. This will be an ongoing journey as new symptoms show up that need to be looked at. I know now that there is a lot of unreleased trauma in my body that is a contributing factor in not healing mentally or physically and I know now what needs to be done to improve. There is only so much that the medical profession can do, I believe the rest of the responsibility lies with us in digging deeper to find the causes and the answers. In many ways, that in itself becomes empowering. Take care all.indigo