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How do I talk to my doctor?

Jeriava
Community Member
I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.
9 Replies 9

Sophie_M
Moderator
Moderator
Wishing you a warm welcome to the forums, Jeriava, we're so glad that you've taken such a big step in reaching out here tonight. It sounds like you've been struggling for quite some time now, and we're glad to hear that you've been so proactive in making an appointment with your GP to discuss these intense feelings you've been trying to cope with. We can hear how worried and scared you must be feeling at the prospect of opening up about what you're going through, and we understand what a vulnerable process this can be. But please know that you've come to a safe and non-judgemental space to express yourself, and our caring community are here to offer their support and advice to you- you never have to go through this alone.

If you feel up to it, we'd also encourage you to reach out to our Beyond Blue Support Service, which is available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or on Webchat 1pm-12am AEST on our website: www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport. One of our friendly counsellors will be able to talk through these feelings with you and can offer support, advice and some information about what this process with your GP might look like to help ease your anxiety before your appointment.

We're all here for you, and we hope that you keep us updated on how you're going whenever you feel ready. 



 

jtjt_4862
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hi Jeriava,

Welcome to the forums, would like to start off by saying, you're doing great by posting in this forum. I'm really sorry to hear that you're feeling this way about yourself at the moment. I want to assure you that your feelings are valid, and I'm more than happy to listen to you without any judgement, if you feel like talking to someone. It can certainly be scary to open up your feelings, so take it at your own pace. The forum is filled with very friendly, supportive people, and it is a safe place for you to express yourself. You're not alone Jeriava, and we're all ready to listen to you.

Jt

Summer Rose
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi Jeriava

Welcome to the bb forum and congratulations on having the courage to share your story here.

I can understand your concerns about talking with your doctor. Such an important first step, but it can be really challenging.

Given that you rarely visit this doctor, I’m hoping that your doctor will realise the issue is really important to you, otherwise you wouldn’t be there.

Try to remember that doctors have heard it all. You likely won’t be the first person that day to share details of a mental health concern—and you won’t be the last.

There are millions of people across Australia experiencing a mental health condition right now. There is no shame in falling ill and it can happen to anyone—and your doctor knows this better than anyone else.

If you think it will be hard to “say what you wanna say” you can write it all down. It’s perfectly okay to read from your notes or even give the notes to your doctor. This will spark some questions and a conversation.

It could be helpful to ask a family member or friend to accompany you. They don’t necessarily have to sit in the appointment (unless you want that) but they can help you get through the door.

My daughter has a mental health condition and when she was a teen she asked me to accompany her to many appointments. The first GP we saw wasn’t particularly helpful, but the second was.

I guess what I’m saying is, if you don’t get the supportive response you need keep trying. There are very good GPS out there.

On a practical note, I’m wondering if you booked a double appointment? It just helps to make sure you’re not rushed out the door and that the doctor has time to give your concerns proper attention.

Kind thoughts to you

LJpd81
Community Member

First of all huge hugs for you. I understand as I had to ask my doctor for help last week.

I wrote a post. I got good suggestions. The post is in self harm and suicide.

LJpd81
Community Member
https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/suicidal-thoughts-and-self-harm/how-to-ask-your-gp-for-help-for-referral-for-psychologist-

smallwolf
Community Champion
Community Champion

hi and welcome to the forums.

I imagine this would be a scary time. Making the appointment is one of the biggest things to do - shows bravery and courage. And that is you. Most if not all GPs are supportive. From memory they asked me questions about what happened, and had to fill out a form and there were questions about family as well. Before I went I also did the K10 test on the beyond web site. I will say my GP asked me to go to psych. for a 2nd opinion - I was sent back to get a mental health plan. Be honest, and if you feel you might have issues talking about it you could print out a copy of your post here?

if you have any questions or want to chat more, we are here ... and listening...

Tim

Cliffordz
Community Member
Hi! Did this work? How do you feel now, OP?
I hope you were welcomed nicely and have managed to build a good relationship with the doctor you have. I know how difficult it might be for an antisocial person to come out and seek help and how vulnerable such people are. The thing that you need now is a little bit of someone’s attention and communication. Communication is key because it helps to solve so many problems and misunderstandings.
I have not visited a psychiatrist before, but I have had many other doctor appointments, and I can tell how much stress they can cause even if you do not have some clear social anxiety issues.
So, good luck!

Hello Cliffordz, visiting a psychiatrist can be completely different than visiting a psychologist as I have experienced myself, but it depends on your condition and how you are feeling, but at times it may benefit you to have experience with either of these psych's.

When you walk into their office and sit down, they ask you how they can help sometimes people become frozen and don't know what to say or perhaps discuss an item that's not the actual concern, which may disappoint you when the session has finished.

To overcome this problem, try and write down the main points that upset you and causing the most damage, and if I can suggest you write them down in point form, this way they can read them, taking into account what you are trying to say, rather than if it's in a letter, the main points might be lost.

I have asked psychiatrist's question after question, but no answer is given, whereas a psychologist will answer these questions, all of this depends on what you are after.

Some people swear by their psychiatrist, which is great, but I saw my psychologist for 20 odd years as it was a workcover claim and no cost to me.

Please let us know how you get on.

Geoff.

Richju
Community Member

Dear Jeriava,

I can fully understand your fear of approaching your doctor for depression, especially as you aren't a regular patient.

Doctors are busy, with only a limited time for each patient, however, now that depression is so common in our society, I believe that most will listen and offer help.

Like you, I felt frightened and alone when I was severely depressed. I trusted no one and was very anti-social. My lack of energy was so extreme that even a trip to the toilet felt like climbing a mountain and I felt so lazy and inadequate.

Please Jeriava, allow yourself to sleep as much as you can. For me, this was the best way to heal. After a while, I tried walking for just 10 minutes a day, forgiving myself if I missed a day.

Gradually, gradually my depression lifted and the sun shone once more.

In the meanwhile, please recognise that you are unwell and deserve your doctor's help. Depression is nothing to be ashamed of and I believe your doctor will give you good care, especially if they know that you are trying to help yourself in small ways.

I look forward to further chats with you Jeriava. Supporting you through this difficult time means that my own experiences were worth it.

Warmest regards,

Ruchju