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Caring for myself and others

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Staying well

Support each other to stay well, from mindfulness, sleep, diet and exercise to reducing drug and alcohol use and coping with difficult emotions.

Clara1 Health Crisis
  • replies: 1

My neighbour’s niece is having a health crisis, possibly cancer and is in hospital. I have spoken to my neighbour about this. I have not seen the niece in some months but I worry about her. I know they are not my family but they have always been nice... View more

My neighbour’s niece is having a health crisis, possibly cancer and is in hospital. I have spoken to my neighbour about this. I have not seen the niece in some months but I worry about her. I know they are not my family but they have always been nice to me and I want them to be well. Not sure where to proceed from here.

white knight Take a swim of empathy
  • replies: 0

I would guess that many of you are empaths. The Community Champions here are, no doubt and a high percentage of members are also. So what is the advantages and disadvantages of being an empath... and what is it exactly? "Empath" isn't an official psy... View more

I would guess that many of you are empaths. The Community Champions here are, no doubt and a high percentage of members are also. So what is the advantages and disadvantages of being an empath... and what is it exactly? "Empath" isn't an official psychological term, but it's generally defined as a person who is highly attuned to the emotions of others. Empathy is an essential skill for all kinds of relationships. But people with very high levels of it may have a hard time setting boundaries between themselves and others. I think that hits the mark. But metaphorically I would say that I'm living in a bath of empathy where there are no enemies, no danger but the water there that I swim in are made from built up tears over nearly 70 years. The deeper it gets the more at home I feel. If I climb the ladder to mix with others then I'm subjecting myself to dangers. However I like other empaths are really emotionally alone most of the time and we yearn to dive back in, back home, it seems that when life is a blur a translucent vision of beautiful things like birds, dogs cats, wildlife ... all harmless wonderful things, thats where love is. The penalty for being an empath is that your state of mind isnt other peoples problem. "Normal" people are quite happy dealing with each other, emotional - rarely, ready to defend and prepared to attack verbally or worse is part of day to day life. They watch you swim and recall when a loved passed or a pet and quickly they return to sipping their wine or drowning but in beer. Maybe they dont drink so they might take a deep breath and get on with it!. For us empaths we reach the side of the pool and observe the fallen. We get out of out comfort station and built a dam wall to save them slipping into a place they might not return or sit on a log listening or lifting them.. the crowd still mingle and we direct them that way ... they turn and we are gone... submerged. Being an empath is a unbelievable feeling of emotion that take us where few can go, an emotion level that is amazingly sad, amazingly so unbelievable its hard to describe but one thing is certain for many of us... we wouldnt have it any other way. In the words of Stephen Fry "if I was reincarnated I would want my bipolar, I wouldnt know how to live any other way.... TonyWK

.liv_.. Struggling to find direction
  • replies: 1

Hello!I have been recently finding myself in situations where I am faced with an easy task but then met with the overwhelming feeling of not being able to do it. I have put it down to laziness for ages not but I am starting to think I could be someth... View more

Hello!I have been recently finding myself in situations where I am faced with an easy task but then met with the overwhelming feeling of not being able to do it. I have put it down to laziness for ages not but I am starting to think I could be something else?Currently, my sleep schedule is horrible, I go to bed around 3am and wake up around 11am. During these early hours I have a tendency to spiral. I am fully aware that I do this but I still can’t seem to stop myself from being in this bad sleep schedule.I dealt with very bad anxiety and ADHD as a child which I presume has gone away as I am no longer medicated but I can still feel myself sometimes verging on panic attacks (which I still remember how to call myself down from them as a child, so I don’t go into a full spiral). Other simple tasks like attending online uni lectures is a struggle for much, dispite me recognizing this is a simple task.I guess, in a roundabout way of saying it, I am struggling to find any motivation to help myself and was wondering if anyone has had similar experiences and any helpful tips to fix this. Thanks.

Treatments, health professionals and therapies

Information on a range of different areas, including managing relationships with GPs and psychologists, and finding the right services for you.

Anonymous_18531 Gut health link to mental health
  • replies: 2

Recently, I’ve been experiencing some weird symptoms, just feeling a bit off overall. Nausea here and there, a general sense of anxiety that I can’t really explain. It made me start paying more attention to what I’ve been eating and whether that migh... View more

Recently, I’ve been experiencing some weird symptoms, just feeling a bit off overall. Nausea here and there, a general sense of anxiety that I can’t really explain. It made me start paying more attention to what I’ve been eating and whether that might be playing a role. I ended up down a bit of a rabbit hole reading about how our gut might actually influence our mood and mental health. Has anyone else noticed changes in their mental or emotional state based on their diet? And when it comes to therapy or professional support, is gut health something that actually gets talked about? Or is it one of those things that flies under the radar in mental health discussions?

melon Psychologist is on leave
  • replies: 2

I will not be seeing her until the end of this month is it possible to book for another one as soon as possible and how do I do it? I'm in need of immeidate help.

I will not be seeing her until the end of this month is it possible to book for another one as soon as possible and how do I do it? I'm in need of immeidate help.

bigstar medication changes.
  • replies: 1

Hey guys, after four months of what i thought was chronic fatigue after a virus--i started getting midnight panic attacks and was suffering. I decided at that stage that I didnt have chronic fatigue, I had a depressive episode that was insidious enou... View more

Hey guys, after four months of what i thought was chronic fatigue after a virus--i started getting midnight panic attacks and was suffering. I decided at that stage that I didnt have chronic fatigue, I had a depressive episode that was insidious enough for me not to realise, until the panic attacks reared their ugly head. Anyways, spoke to new GP and upped my dose of my current medication 23 days ago. Im much worse now then I was then. Although the fatigue is gone, I'm feeling a bit hopeless especially since Im trying to do all the right things. Appetite gone, last week I was throwing up food that I wasnt trying to force myself to eat. Random boughts of crying, dread, crushing depression, anxiety etc. Not much relief outside of sedatives and everyday feels like a full uphill battle. I've been on my current medication and dosage for 7 years and have enjoyed relatively good life as a result--can't see my gp till next week and I'm just worried. 23 days and it feels like my condition is detiorating and I'm not sure what this suggests. I keep promising my boss it'll be over tomorrow and I'll be back at work, only worked one day last week. My partner is freaking out because shes never seen this before, but I assure her I've done it before and I'll do it again--but the weight loss is freaking her out as well. Urrrrggg. Love and hope to everyone fighting this invisible gross sickness.

Relationship and family issues

Anything to do with managing relationships and family, including parenting, separation, loneliness, divorce, family and friendships.

Mel2334 parenting with a abi aquired brain injurey
  • replies: 0

i know feeling judged is not easy and i just wanna no others experience and thoughts with goverment and legal system as im going through family court i have support and a son i love and adore which i think going through some things as well

i know feeling judged is not easy and i just wanna no others experience and thoughts with goverment and legal system as im going through family court i have support and a son i love and adore which i think going through some things as well

Wildorchid17 Lost
  • replies: 3

Not even sure why or what I’m posting. Just reaching out so I don’t feel so alone basically. I’m a mum of 7.same father for all my kids. Ages newborn to 16 Seperated within last year or so. Previous DV. Not physical but due to alcoholic husband emoti... View more

Not even sure why or what I’m posting. Just reaching out so I don’t feel so alone basically. I’m a mum of 7.same father for all my kids. Ages newborn to 16 Seperated within last year or so. Previous DV. Not physical but due to alcoholic husband emotional and mental and more etc. married for a really long time. Was seperated under one roof partially as housing crisis and he initially refused to leave as everything is half his. I’m just so lost I’m forever trying my hardest to make ends meet and make sure everyone is happy…. Some of my older kids struggling with highschool so exploring distance ed. I don’t have anyone to talk to, it’s just hard. Any advice on how to stay this strong. ? Probably a really stupid post

123lil Is it too late?
  • replies: 1

My boyfriend and I worked together at the same place and both ended up quitting at the same time. He ended up taking a job with his brother 2 hours away, which means he's only home on weekends. This has been a big adjustment for me as we've lived tog... View more

My boyfriend and I worked together at the same place and both ended up quitting at the same time. He ended up taking a job with his brother 2 hours away, which means he's only home on weekends. This has been a big adjustment for me as we've lived together pretty much since the begining of our relationship (been together almost 2 yrs). I havent found another job yet which has really gotten me down but he's encouraged me to focus on my art and assured me that he can support the both of us. A couple of weeks after he started working away, I went through his phone and found that he'd been talking to another woman. After I confronted him, he apologised, told me that they havent actually met up and blocked her on everything. I guess he thought that would be the end of it but this has really made my anxiety flare up. Since, every weekend hes been home, I've managed to bring it up again and cause a fight, even though thats not what I want to do. Hes never been good at texting me back or calling to check in and since hes been away my anxiety has made me think the worst. Ive asked him to reasure me more often but he doesnt seem to understand. This past friday we ended up in a massvie fight and some of my family and friends got involved. The next day he said he thinks we should break up, I asked him if there was a chance we could try to work it out and he agreed on the condition that we take some time to reflect on our situation. I really dont want this to be the end of our relationship, I guess I'm just looking for advice on how to get past this. I hadn't talked to anyone about it until after our big fight, which I think has contributed to me not being able to move on. I'm worried that its too late to fix this and that my anxiety will get the better of me and I wont give him the pace he asked for. Is there any way that we can build trust again? He'll be home to talk on the weekend and I want to be able to comunicate without arguing or alienating eachother.

Supporting family and friends

Share tips on supporting a partner, family member or friend with a mental health condition, and seeking support for your own wellbeing.

Quiettall How to guide a brother with serious mental health issues
  • replies: 11

I have a younger brother who is about 65 years old. He destroyed his marriage and relationships with his immediate family (children/grandchildren) some 5 or so years ago by gambling his and his wife's savings away. He is an habitual liar, telling all... View more

I have a younger brother who is about 65 years old. He destroyed his marriage and relationships with his immediate family (children/grandchildren) some 5 or so years ago by gambling his and his wife's savings away. He is an habitual liar, telling all sorts of stories to make out he is doing well and very successful in life. Last Christmas he had a heart issue and was admitted to Intensive care for a few weeks. I was notified within minutes of flying overseas with my wife (He listed me as next of kin because no-one else in the family will have anything to do with him). He is now recovered and living in a men's refuge style of accommodation, although he tells me he has bought and living in his own unit. He had a relationship with a woman who has contacted me saying she has serious concerns about his deluded behaviour. She has sent deliveries of food and clothes to him as she visited him earlier in the year as a surprise, and was shocked at the poor quality of accommodation he is in. He arrived at my older brother's (Noel) home on Friday night for an overnight stay en-route to catching up with mates in Melbourne. My older brother rang me to say he was shocked and very concerned at Steve's mental and physical state. When Steve talks to me by sms or phone, he makes out he is working, earning a good income, has recovered and walks 3-5 kms per day. However Noel said he could not walk 100 metres without struggling due to swollen legs and ankles, and Steve bragged about how he is living with 3 mates, has ahuge superannuation savings, is well supported by Centrelink and some side hussle he has (we think he is gambling still). I have tried getting mental health support for him in NSW but he refuses, saying he is fine.I am concerned an not sure what I can do as I am in Brisbane caring for my very ill wife. I am fearing he will end up like his older brother who died 2 years ago after he suffered serious bi-polar and delusional behaviour, and ended up in an older men's care centre in Queensland. I would be open to any guidance or advice here

Artemis Very close friend attempted
  • replies: 2

I think it feels right to post this here. Yesterday (9th May 2025, Friday), at school, one of my closest friends tried to commit suicide. Keep in mind that he opens up to me and I open up to him, neither of us open up to anyone else. Since Wednesday,... View more

I think it feels right to post this here. Yesterday (9th May 2025, Friday), at school, one of my closest friends tried to commit suicide. Keep in mind that he opens up to me and I open up to him, neither of us open up to anyone else. Since Wednesday, he had been cold to us, then on Thursday, texting in the group chat during period 4, he was being quite rude as well. I had told the rest of my friends that last time he had stopped responding to messages, afterwards he had told me he was trying to ruin his life so he could die in peace. We were worried this was what this time was. Friday, start of period 2, he messaged the group chat and simply said “I’m sorry…”. We didn’t connect the dots until later. We had thought it was just an apology for how he acted. Halfway through period 2 my friend turned to me and was like “wait… he has PE. This would be a good time to go to the bathroom and just…”. We looked at each other for a few moments, both of us connecting everything. Then she said “I’m gonna ask to go to the bathroom.” When she came back, she asked me if anyone had told me, because another friend had walked in who knew. I shook my head. “(Friend) tried to kill himself.” We couldn’t focus for the rest of the lesson. After the period ended we went up to the quiet room. We were in there all day. One of us, there were 4 altogether, had a partner assessment and couldn’t leave their partner, so she went to class. One of us left during period 5. My last friend, the one who had connected the dots, left during period 6, and I went back to class for the last 15 minutes. We had spent the time during the day chatting, about the incident and other things, trying to distract each other and ourselves, and talking to one of the counsellors a few times, as well as me calling my auntie for some advice and just because I needed to tell someone aside from my friends. It hadn’t felt real. Like this should only happen in movies. “It feels like somebody is going to pop out of nowhere with a camera and say ‘scene’”, one of my friends said, “and then we have to move on with our lives like this never happened”. Keep in mind we’re only in year 8 right now. It was a lot. We got a message at around lunchtime from the friend who had attempted, saying he was safe and in the hospital and he just wanted to let us know. Later, around 4pm, he said he was discharged but didn’t know when he’d be back at school. I don’t know what to do with myself now. What are you supposed to do when this happens?

Guest_15637445 My sister is 26 but acts 12
  • replies: 2

My 26 yo sister still lives at home, has had 3 jobs total, all that have lasted only a month each before being let go due to lack of interest, and is extremely rude. She doesn’t do any house work or chores. If you speak to her, she is quick to snap a... View more

My 26 yo sister still lives at home, has had 3 jobs total, all that have lasted only a month each before being let go due to lack of interest, and is extremely rude. She doesn’t do any house work or chores. If you speak to her, she is quick to snap and blame. For our whole lives, we have never been close despite being only 19 months apart and this didn’t bother me because she’s into different things and, well, she’s rude but recently she has started to display behaviour that makes me think she’s actually unwell and maybe even didn’t develop Cognitively. She has started to refuse to talk to any family besides my mum and myself (and barely even us) and she pulled out most of her eyebrows. She’s also skin and bone (I think 45kg and 5’3) and is on a diet which is crazy that she thinks she needs to be. When I saw her eyebrows, it’s like something clicked and I realised she is crying for help and has no way of getting it. I don’t live there but I’ve tried to message and she blows me off, even just to hang out. If I do go there, she won’t come out from her room and say hello. When I gave her her birthday gift last month, I went into her room with my partner and she took the gift, said “okay” and showed us the door. She has no manners but she did when we was a kid. She’s actually getting more child like as she gets older. My family have no money to get her help and she doesn’t work. My dad is worried she’s depressed and suicidal. How do you help someone who doesn’t want to have a real conversation with anyone and with no money. I feel trapped and I can’t imagine how she feels.

Long-term support over the journey

A space for regular members to keep in touch and revisit ongoing discussions with more than 100 posts.

Dolly My fiancé has bipolar
  • replies: 5

My fiancé has always been very kind and loving towards me and has always told me how much he loves me. He has always told me to never doubt his love for me. Our wedding is all planned for 7 weeks time, then out of the blue 2 weeks ago he said that he... View more

My fiancé has always been very kind and loving towards me and has always told me how much he loves me. He has always told me to never doubt his love for me. Our wedding is all planned for 7 weeks time, then out of the blue 2 weeks ago he said that he couldn’t marry me, as he doesn’t love me. I am absolutely shattered and at a loss as to what to do. I have always known from day one that he has bipolar and I am very supportive of his needs. He means a whole lot to me, I love him unconditionally.Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Guest_58442969 Help plse-My work cancelled my maternity leave when my baby died.
  • replies: 1

I’m still a Mum!  My heart is breaking as when my baby died at 6 weeks of age, my workplace cancelled my pre-approved maternity leave and give me a month's personal leave instead. I did not even get the 6 weeks of leave, as my daughter lived for 6 w... View more

I’m still a Mum! 😞 My heart is breaking as when my baby died at 6 weeks of age, my workplace cancelled my pre-approved maternity leave and give me a month's personal leave instead. I did not even get the 6 weeks of leave, as my daughter lived for 6 weeks! My husband on the other hand, received his 3 months paternity leave whilst I was back at work! I created a petition, so this doesn't happen again. We have over 15000 signatures in 3 weeks. All mothers like me, past, present and future with baby loss should be treated with care, compassion, respect and dignity. With Love, Priya’s Mum

Guest_55317670 Major Life Decision
  • replies: 1

I'm becoming so depressed and anxious because of job-hunting and making a major life decision. I'm 21 and have been with my boyfriend for 1.5 years. I love him completely and couldn't imagine my life without him. I want to marry him. My problem is...... View more

I'm becoming so depressed and anxious because of job-hunting and making a major life decision. I'm 21 and have been with my boyfriend for 1.5 years. I love him completely and couldn't imagine my life without him. I want to marry him. My problem is... I can't find a career/job. Every advertisement I look at seems mind-numbing and the path to dead end depression. The only career that has ever interested me is the defence force however I know I would have to leave my boyfriend. Its completely unreasonable to ask him to move states with me as he already has a solid career built. Being away, even long distance, for possibly months on end would hurt us so much. Even if i was able to stay in our current state, who knows if I get moved around in a years time. If I choose love I will hate work - which will be 60+ years of my life. If I choose career I will lose the one thing I've ever truly loved.