Caring for myself and others

Supporting people’s mental health is important, but so is your wellbeing. Learn strategies for caring about yourself and those around you.

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Staying well

Support each other to stay well, from mindfulness, sleep, diet and exercise to reducing drug and alcohol use and coping with difficult emotions.

amd1953 Merry Christmas 2025
  • replies: 1

Once again, I am going to wish the world a very merry Christmas and a happy new year for 2026.Best wishes for inner peace and harmonyamd1953

Once again, I am going to wish the world a very merry Christmas and a happy new year for 2026.Best wishes for inner peace and harmonyamd1953

Guest_07309003 Medical Hair Loss at 19
  • replies: 2

I’m a nineteen year old girl. I am social, I love fashion, makeup, my beauty is my world. I lost 65% of my hair this year after a clinical trial and I am so beyond heartbroken. This is the hardest thing I have gone through in my whole five-year healt... View more

I’m a nineteen year old girl. I am social, I love fashion, makeup, my beauty is my world. I lost 65% of my hair this year after a clinical trial and I am so beyond heartbroken. This is the hardest thing I have gone through in my whole five-year health journey and is the absolute worst pain. My hair has been my world, I’ve had hundreds of coloured streaks and patterns since I was 12 and have always had the most healthy, long and thick hair that I have always valued as my favourite feature about myself.

14041938 Christmas
  • replies: 3

This is my first post.The only part of Christmas I did like is buy gifts for everyone, now I only buy for my Grandchildren. No desire to drag the decorations out, I live alone & will not have any contact with my family for the 3rd year. It gets lonel... View more

This is my first post.The only part of Christmas I did like is buy gifts for everyone, now I only buy for my Grandchildren. No desire to drag the decorations out, I live alone & will not have any contact with my family for the 3rd year. It gets lonely but I prefer to be alone. No expectations or pressure this way.

Treatments, health professionals and therapies

Information on a range of different areas, including managing relationships with GPs and psychologists, and finding the right services for you.

Guest_10319 Feeling unsettled
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I suffer from CPTSD and am in my sixties now. I engaged with a psychologist this morning (for the first time with them) and they went through the confidentiality guidelines. Now, my anxiety is in overdrive. Can my psychologist report my childhood abu... View more

I suffer from CPTSD and am in my sixties now. I engaged with a psychologist this morning (for the first time with them) and they went through the confidentiality guidelines. Now, my anxiety is in overdrive. Can my psychologist report my childhood abuse to the authorities? I was clear about only wanting to talk to someone, and that one of my abusers has passed away and the other is in their eighties.I'm not in danger, and neither is anyone else, so am I right in believing nothing can be reported?

Sareus What should I do if I think ive been misdiagnosed?
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I was diagnosed with schizophrenia but I'm learning about BPD and i feel its the cause of my hallucinations. I personally believe I have 5 or potentially more of the 9 symptoms I didnt really understand all of the criteria. And my hallucinations only... View more

I was diagnosed with schizophrenia but I'm learning about BPD and i feel its the cause of my hallucinations. I personally believe I have 5 or potentially more of the 9 symptoms I didnt really understand all of the criteria. And my hallucinations only occur when im under emotional or mental distress. I have symptoms of schizophrenia too so maybe I have both or neither, idk really know im just lost and confused and distressed about this whole thing. I cant get into a new therapist until February next year at minimum. This post probably doesnt fit but idk where to ask.

simps After 20 years BPD partner wants a divorce
  • replies: 3

All that time and all the range, the screaming, the psychological abuse, i lost good friends because of the way she talks to people but i stuck by them accepted that this is a part of them, i love them for just who they are. but my actions were perce... View more

All that time and all the range, the screaming, the psychological abuse, i lost good friends because of the way she talks to people but i stuck by them accepted that this is a part of them, i love them for just who they are. but my actions were perceived as abandonment. plus we get to relive all the other things i did that they didn't like or upset them i understand the pain there going through, especially reliving all those thing one after another that has to be hard been 4 weeks in the other room any time i try and approach the topic, they split again and i am all bad once again, i would love to give them a cuddle and just say its going to be ok but they wont even talk and if they do its little poking comments that they would want to say anything because it might upset me i haven't yelled i haven't got angry, i have been hit, yelled at, called names, and i am still here.i am so lost

Relationship and family issues

Anything to do with managing relationships and family, including parenting, separation, loneliness, divorce, family and friendships.

not_dead_yet i dont know what to do
  • replies: 0

I was doing better at school before, now a few weeks into the holidays i feel like i am going to relapse with sh. My parents are the main reason of this and i love them i feel that but none of my opinions are being heard or being over heard if that m... View more

I was doing better at school before, now a few weeks into the holidays i feel like i am going to relapse with sh. My parents are the main reason of this and i love them i feel that but none of my opinions are being heard or being over heard if that makes sense.if they agree with me or i push for something it still ends up being discarded. I feel i also dont have the social skills to make friends at school but it was much better there then at home. I think an example of this is that i have constantly been pushing for me to stop extra singing lessons because i have so many that it is impacting my grades, but also because i dont like it at all. the reason i started was because i was belting let it go at like 5 in the living room. they finally agreed to stop, only to say that i should continue because i can always rely on this to make a living when i dont make it into uni. i feel like if i show any interest into anything they take that too seriously as well. I finally was able to push for a tutor but now i have set schedules on when and where to study on top of the singing lessons. I dont deal well with schedules and i study so much better when i feel like im not being pressured to study and i can study wherever i like, which only happened once in a gap between school and parent teacher interviews. I also feel like they arent respecting my privacy either. My mum would come into my room without knocking despite me telling her to knock hundreds of times, i know that this is probs just a mum thing though. My parents overshare private stuff about be as well, such as sharing videos of me with people without asking and me finding my exact measurements online from when i was like 10, this was for an acting website i think. I have had to do multiple performances without even notice and i cant even refuse or my mum will gaslight or threaten me with taking away the only thing i asked for which is skating lessons and it took 10 years for them to agree. im sorry i know im just yapping now. I havent had a day in this holiday where i could just do what i want. I have been having urges to sh again and its getting more frequent and stronger. I dont think i can get through the rest of the holidays without sh let alone before i can move out. I have been getting almost daily thoughts of suicide, though i am too wimpy to go through with it, Ive had past incidents where I wasn't safe and i still have ongoing reminders of the past. I don't want my parents or anyone who would tell my parents to know. What do i do? also please forgive me for my awful grammer, punctuation, spelling and writing in general. I also dont think half of it makes sense sorry. Merry Christmas

mikotheawesome My mum's side of my immediate family is pushing me to suicide
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Basically, this morning my mother asked me if I wanted to go to the beach for Christmas Eve and I said no, because I wasn't in the mood. Then she proceeded to give me the silent treatment and gaslight me into believing she DIDNT do that and I'm the e... View more

Basically, this morning my mother asked me if I wanted to go to the beach for Christmas Eve and I said no, because I wasn't in the mood. Then she proceeded to give me the silent treatment and gaslight me into believing she DIDNT do that and I'm the evil one. Then my step-dad came down and borderline yelled at me to clean my room even though it's already clean and the are just little by little pushing me to the edge and I'll either snap or kms and I don't know what to do. I'm 13 and I don't know if I can deal with this for another 5 years. My mother and father are divorced but I can't stay with my dad due to his demanding job in the city. I really don't know what to do. Im having urges that im worried about. Can anyone help?

Dam9791 Open marriage
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My wife and I have been married for 12 years and have a wonderful loving relationship with 2 teenage kids. I trust my wife 100 percent. Before we got together she had a relationship with another guy that was mostly about sex, ie. Kind of like friends... View more

My wife and I have been married for 12 years and have a wonderful loving relationship with 2 teenage kids. I trust my wife 100 percent. Before we got together she had a relationship with another guy that was mostly about sex, ie. Kind of like friends with benefits as the guy was a complete commitment phobe, due to being cheated on in a past relationship which also happened to my wife, her first husband cheated on her, so I think they had some kind of bond and they have known each other since they were teenagers.About 12 months ago my wife started talking to him again and have formed a friendship which I have no problem with, even though I think he is an idiot and I have nothing to do with him. Somehow when she spends time with him, he makes her happy, I put it down to that when she is with him she is free and not mum or the doting wife being weighed down with all the boring family stuff while she is there. About 3 months ago she bought up the topic of opening our marriage and we did a lot of talking about it, we came to an agreement that nothing would happen unless we were both 100% on board. A couple of weeks back we both agreed. Now she did not rush out and have sex with the guy as at the time she wasn't even sure she wanted to, anyway I got cold feet and asked her not to, so she hasn't. She still does visit him as normal friends would though. Yesterday we talked again and she said that she would like have sex with him again but would only do it with my permission, now I'm not totally against it, i'd get to have sex with someone else as well. She tells me that she is 100% committed to our relationship and she loves me more then anything which I believe. I am also very committed to my wife and until she bought up the idea of opening our marriage would never have even thought about having sex with someone else but the idea is sort of appealing. I guess my question is has anyone done the open marriage thing and is it worth it and what feelings did you have when your partner did actually sleep with someone else.

Supporting family and friends

Share tips on supporting a partner, family member or friend with a mental health condition, and seeking support for your own wellbeing.

Guest_33680115 Support for parent of a teen criminal
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I’m looking for someone who’s been through parenting a child who’s committed crimes. My 14yo has been caught up in the violent crimes that have taken over Melbourne. He’s from a loving (single parent) home but has fallen into the wrong group and has ... View more

I’m looking for someone who’s been through parenting a child who’s committed crimes. My 14yo has been caught up in the violent crimes that have taken over Melbourne. He’s from a loving (single parent) home but has fallen into the wrong group and has committed some horrific crimes. His crime spree lasted about 4 weeks where he was arrested 3 times. After his 3rd arrest he was remanded to parkville and has not been granted bail - it’s been over a month. After the 2nd failed attempt at bail he’s completely shut down, refusing any communication with lawyers, youth justice, me, other family members. My heart is absolutely breaking. Prior to his 1st arrest I had sought out help for 12 months from any agency I could because I could see him becoming disengaged and all told me he didn’t qualify because he wasn’t “bad enough”. After the last arrest I was told he didn’t qualify because the charges were too serious. I’m one of the most hated parents in Melbourne right now and I have to put on a brave face each day for my other kids but I’m broken inside. I’m scared to go to the shops in case someone sees me and says something. I’m scared somebody will say something to my other kids. I’m scared him being in custody this long will ruin him. It’s just me and my kids and I’m struggling to hold down a full time job, parent my other kids and support him through this. Not having anyone to talk to who understands is really hard.

Soberlicious96 Sick of being everybody's reminder person
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I am so sick and tired of people asking ME to do stuff for THEM that they should be doing for themselves. I am not their keeper. They are fully grown, capable adults who seemingly cannot be bothered to organise their own schedules. Perhaps I should s... View more

I am so sick and tired of people asking ME to do stuff for THEM that they should be doing for themselves. I am not their keeper. They are fully grown, capable adults who seemingly cannot be bothered to organise their own schedules. Perhaps I should start charging them a fee for being their personal assistant! Seriously! I mean, how hard is it to set your own alarm or put something on your own calendar??? Sometimes this mental load that I seem to end up carrying for others is just too much.

Aymee Supporting a depressed partner
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My partner (30M) has suffered depression for as long as he can remember and is also currently going through the autism/adhd diagnosis process. He struggles with alcohol and cannabis use. This year so far he has had three serious suicidal bouts where ... View more

My partner (30M) has suffered depression for as long as he can remember and is also currently going through the autism/adhd diagnosis process. He struggles with alcohol and cannabis use. This year so far he has had three serious suicidal bouts where myself and his family had serious concerns for his wellbeing. He is seeing a therapist and was taking meds. He’s stopped taking them after 3 weeks and stated he’s only going to therapy because we are fixing him and that it’s useless and a waste of time/money. we have a young child and I’m growing increasingly concerned about his capacity to care for them and concerned about his behaviours. At what point do we try other things? Discuss inpatient places? Myself and his family believe we shave tried all the first steps here - GP, therapist, psych, meds etc. but at a loss as to what now? any advice appreciated.

Long-term support over the journey

A space for regular members to keep in touch and revisit ongoing discussions with more than 100 posts.

crumbly_rain I feel like my depression will never get better
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I've been struggling with anxiety and depression for years now and it never seems to get better. everytime I start new meds I feel better for like a week and then it's back to it. I know that's how meds work but it's still frustrating to get a taste ... View more

I've been struggling with anxiety and depression for years now and it never seems to get better. everytime I start new meds I feel better for like a week and then it's back to it. I know that's how meds work but it's still frustrating to get a taste of what my life could be like. I've done therapy and counselling and all that but I can never make myself believe I'll get better, which is probably why they don't work. I think about suicide all the time but I feel like my depression isn't bad enough to make me actually do it. I sometimes wish my life would get worse so I could finally get it over with. even when my depression isn't as bad as usual I still feel like I'm just pushing back my inevitable suicide. like no matter what I do it'll eventually happen and I'm just prolonging it. because I feel like I'll never get better, I spend all my time hoping I'll just die. even if I do get better, I'll probably never be "normal" so it's hard to even care. I've heard of being passively suicidal but I feel like this might be more than that idk tho.

james-i Planning on driving a car with ASD
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Hey,It's James here (now 20 turning 21 this year) with ASDI'm planning on saving money to buy my car so I can drive it only on a farm (with no public access) with my support personIf your any questions please askThanks

Hey,It's James here (now 20 turning 21 this year) with ASDI'm planning on saving money to buy my car so I can drive it only on a farm (with no public access) with my support personIf your any questions please askThanks

BrightEyes-1234 What’s the point.
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Mkay. I’m 42. I’ve spent most of my life going through the motions. My therapist has said I likely have c-ptsd from childhood trauma. I’m having marriage issues that I’m trying to fix. Sometimes I feel like what’s the point. I’m midlife. I’ve already... View more

Mkay. I’m 42. I’ve spent most of my life going through the motions. My therapist has said I likely have c-ptsd from childhood trauma. I’m having marriage issues that I’m trying to fix. Sometimes I feel like what’s the point. I’m midlife. I’ve already spent most of my life going through the motions. What’s another 20 or so years. But a part of me wants to feel alive. And live. But another part thinks why bother. And I am constantly torn between the two. And wanting to ‘fix’ myself so I can be truly happy? If that makes sense. Has anyone else, older, ‘healed’ and found ‘joy’? Is it ever too late?