Immediate support
Immediate support

Introduce yourself

Welcome to the Forums, Beyond Blue’s community space for sharing, listening and learning.

Start a discussion
Start a discussion

FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

View the FAQ

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

View the guidelines
Jump to
Welcome and orientation

Welcome! If you’re not sure where to start, that’s OK. We’re keen to know more about you and what you’re looking for on our Forums.

Apparentlyhotbutnot27 Keeps Coming Back: My Story
  • replies: 0

Let’s do this: My main issue / is lack of relationships, friendships & literally no intimacy over the last 20 -25 years. I had a horrible upbringing & probably suffered on a level that no kid should have to. I didn’t have any emotional support growin... View more

Let’s do this: My main issue / is lack of relationships, friendships & literally no intimacy over the last 20 -25 years. I had a horrible upbringing & probably suffered on a level that no kid should have to. I didn’t have any emotional support growing up, moved around alot. I basically educated myself on all aspects of life. which worked but didn't last long as you will read. I remember finishing school & soon after the house of cards came falling down. I'll never forget the anxiety for as long as I live. I never told anyone for 2 years but had to, as I knew I couldn’t go on anymore. I saw a Dr who put me on anti-depressants, which did SFA. I was too erractic to bother going back, so my condition stayed like this for another 3 years. I just faked being happy & tried my best to please everyone, knew that part well. Soon found alcohol & drugs & proceeded to run myself into oblivion for next 5 years. My family & friends were worried sick, so I’d behave for a few weeks then the cycle started again. The penny dropped after writing off two cars and narrowly avoiding jail time, so I decided to get help. It was fun at the time but boy was I was pretty loose, how I made it out alive i'll never know actually. I’ve thought about suicide a lot, still do. Something inside tells me to keep going, don’t know why but I’ve always decided to hang tough in the hope of it all being worth it someday. I've recently been diagnosed with ADHD (3 years ago) & am on medication, which has helped stabilse my life & I’ve made some improvements. I guess a lot of what’s driving this: Lack of intimacy. Nowhere near the amount i'd hoped & none since ADHD diagnosis either. I’ve had women find me attractive & I’ve had opportunities to date over the years but due to my situation, couldn't act on it them which is really sad. I've honestly tried my best but i'm ashamed, class myself as a joke. I know alot of people who know me would be shocked & couldn't imagine this happening to someone like myself. That wasn’t meant to sound arrogant either, sorry if it did. I've never been bitter & resentful towards others though, I’d love to use my experience to help young kids or adults dealing with whatever challenges they are facing, or may face one day. Guess it would do some good. I apologise for upsetting anyone with what’s been written & if some doesn’t make sense. Had to fight back tears whilst writing this & it’s taken longer that I thought it would.. Big thanks for letting me share today. JG.

PB7193 I often feel jealous
  • replies: 3

Hi, I am in need of advice or just people to listen to me. I am in relationship that has been going nearly 5 years and I have a very hard time with jealousy. It’s not my partners fault as I was the same with my ex wife. It’s something that I have alw... View more

Hi, I am in need of advice or just people to listen to me. I am in relationship that has been going nearly 5 years and I have a very hard time with jealousy. It’s not my partners fault as I was the same with my ex wife. It’s something that I have always been ashamed of and I try my best to not let it show. I always do things to try and avoid me having suspicious thoughts for example I never look at her phone when she is messaging people (A) it is unfair to her not really my business and (B) I don’t want to see a small part of a conversation and have it taken out of context making me feel suspicious. I finding doing these sort of things helps. However if something seems out of place to keep going with phone example say she seems to type quickly and then close phone when I sit next to her I start wondering why she is doing that, when in reality she wants to finish messaging so we can talk uninterrupted but my mind straight away thinks she is hiding something , the phone is just an example other times she will say things that seem out of order to what she has said before which makes my mind tick. I rarely if ever talk to her about it as I know it’s my issue and I don’t want her to feel bad especially when she is doing nothing wrong. I am now at the point where I feel like life would be easier if I left the relationship that way I wouldn’t have to feel this way again. Some days I feel despair and like my head could explode. I just don’t know how to change it. I have seen a psychologist in the past which helps but if I see one she will know why and be hurt which I don’t want to do. Has anyone else felt like this and learned to live with it or could give me any advice? Any and all would be appreciated Thank you

Lillies Newbie
  • replies: 3

Hi I am new to these forums. I suffer from C-PTSD, anxiety and depression. I currently have a psychologist and psychiatrist for support. I am various types of medications. Have tried DBT, EMDR, ECT just to name a few.I am married with 2 teenage child... View more

Hi I am new to these forums. I suffer from C-PTSD, anxiety and depression. I currently have a psychologist and psychiatrist for support. I am various types of medications. Have tried DBT, EMDR, ECT just to name a few.I am married with 2 teenage children who are my world.I struggle with everyday life and keep to myself a lot. I don't have any friends.I am hoping I can find people like myself.Thanks for reading.

BB Social Zone

Talking about mental health can be heavy. We get that. BB Social Zone offers a space where you can chill out and socialise with other members.

Starlight459902 How to help someone
  • replies: 1

I am 45 and having been seeing someone 50 yes old. He ended our relationship yesterday saying he feels numb about anything. Has always felt this way which is why his previous marriage didn't work. He says nothing matters because he is 50 and the majo... View more

I am 45 and having been seeing someone 50 yes old. He ended our relationship yesterday saying he feels numb about anything. Has always felt this way which is why his previous marriage didn't work. He says nothing matters because he is 50 and the majority of his life is over. He says he is not going to do anything stupid but wishes he was not here. We have agreed to stay friends and I care for him very much and can see he needs help, he spoke about this but he was not too keen on the idea. Please help as I don't want to overstep the mark and lose the friendship as well.

Julietta44 Depression and anxiety
  • replies: 6

Hi I’m Julie I’m really suffering one year ago my 27 year old son who lived with me left and disowned me telling me I’m toxic I have not heard or seen him since and my tgen my cat died and in October I was diagnosed with stage 1 uterine cancer which ... View more

Hi I’m Julie I’m really suffering one year ago my 27 year old son who lived with me left and disowned me telling me I’m toxic I have not heard or seen him since and my tgen my cat died and in October I was diagnosed with stage 1 uterine cancer which I had a full hysterectomy for everything crumbled after that I’ve always suffered depression badly but now I suffer anxiety and panic attacks on top of it I have really hit rock bottom it’s hard as now I suffer menopause too which doesn’t help sorry for letting it all out at once but I don’t have many friends or family

JakethePeg Introducing myself
  • replies: 2

Hi all,I am posting here on the forums for the first time. Apologies in advance if I break the rules. I decided to join the forums because I am currently experiencing very severe depression, and I wanted to connect with others who understand very wel... View more

Hi all,I am posting here on the forums for the first time. Apologies in advance if I break the rules. I decided to join the forums because I am currently experiencing very severe depression, and I wanted to connect with others who understand very well what it is like to experience this very debilitating mental health disorder. I am currently working very closely with my GP and psychologist to get on top of my depression and to feel better. But it is very slow going, or at least it feels like it. One of the main things I do every day and every morning to fight the good fight against the black dog is read my positive affirmations that I personally created.

Forums feedback and updates

Leave feedback and share your ideas to help us improve the Forums experience.

Cottonsocks Past relationship patterns?
  • replies: 1

I have had a failed past relationship of 17years whom I had 2 children with.It was and is still a very bitter break up. Both children have been turned against me by their father so that is hurtful. My relationship now is with a man who tries hard but... View more

I have had a failed past relationship of 17years whom I had 2 children with.It was and is still a very bitter break up. Both children have been turned against me by their father so that is hurtful. My relationship now is with a man who tries hard but doesn't know how to give emotional support or pick up emotional cues. I have to spell everything out and am beginning to resent that I just can't be me. He is very different to me and although when we are good we are great but when we fight I feel resentment build and I have had enough of compromise. I know relationships are hard work and I do compromise yet I am so aware of past patterns occuring that I get angry and resent my partner and look at all the negatives. My past partnership was full of resentment . I was always under pressure to have everything just right in every aspect of my life. I did everything around the house, raised the kids,worked and studied. I was never valued or appreciated and never an equal or a partner.How do I stop these feelings of pressure and resentment creeping in when I don't feel my present partner is consciously trying to put pressure on me. When we fight I just get so scared of another failed relationship that I push back due to fear,anxiety and resentment and I don't know how to change the way I react. Sometimes I feel life would be easier on my own.

AnimalLover2 Lost my replies again !
  • replies: 2

Hello, it’s AL2. I finally found all my replies just recently from over 10 months ago and was replying to everyone who sent wonderful advice to me!!! I’m so sorry I couldn’t find them before. I was in the middle of replying to another C.M. When I was... View more

Hello, it’s AL2. I finally found all my replies just recently from over 10 months ago and was replying to everyone who sent wonderful advice to me!!! I’m so sorry I couldn’t find them before. I was in the middle of replying to another C.M. When I was interrupted, I turned iPad on again and now can’t find the reply I was writing to thank someone. I am logged in and keep going to either my discussions or my thread but can’t see any of the lovely people who wrote to me. HELP please again!!!! I have tried everything I can think of! Thank you anyone with patience to help me. AL

tranzcrybe RE: technical question - how to read and reply...
  • replies: 2

Hey Divine Goddess, this post is specifically for you!I was just thinking that if you didn't know how to read a thread/post, then you might not be able to access any answers provided - bit of a catch 22...I see you are okay accessing a TOPIC using th... View more

Hey Divine Goddess, this post is specifically for you!I was just thinking that if you didn't know how to read a thread/post, then you might not be able to access any answers provided - bit of a catch 22...I see you are okay accessing a TOPIC using the blue buttons and links, and have ably demonstrated how to start a conversation, but the thing you need to know is that most TITLES (and particularly those of threads posted) and basically anything written in blue, link to the content (- even the links at the bottom take you somewhere relevant) and from there it is easy to click the REPLY button (once signed in) to add your say.Just hover over everything to find a link.Have fun exploring and do check the FAQ if you haven't already.