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Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

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Guest_1055 Walking and Exercise
  • replies: 4570

Hey to anyone reading this. Last night I had an idea about starting a new thread about exercise especially walking. I am aware that walking is very beneficial for our mental, emotional and physical well being. And by actually doing it....well it can ... View more

Hey to anyone reading this. Last night I had an idea about starting a new thread about exercise especially walking. I am aware that walking is very beneficial for our mental, emotional and physical well being. And by actually doing it....well it can make a huge difference to how we cope with the storms that we face in life. OK, I am not real good at disciplining myself to walk, and have to really push myself to do it. And sometimes it is even hard to leave this bedroom. Anyway I am not a beginner walker, as I have stuck to sort of a plan before. So I know that it does make me feel somewhat better. But I only stayed on the plan for a couple of months, then gave up.....for whatever reason. So here I am again wanting desperately to not fail this time. So I guess this thread is for anyone that does walk, anyone that is struggling to walk because of depression or anxiety issues. And anyone else really...... I am unsure of the outcome of all this. But my ideas included: Sharing about things we have found out about exercise especially about walking. Writing down the reasons that one would chose to walk ( like something to help motivate). Being accountable in same way. Sharing about the places where we actually do walk, like the beach, gym, around the block, with the dog, out to the clothesline and back. And any other useful tips that could help others. So here we go......

Guest_05971723 Loneliness
  • replies: 3

After high school our friendship group separated, I was left with my best friend and another friend. My best friend drifted apart a few years ago and the other friend I drifted away from earlier this year (we hadn’t caught up since February last year... View more

After high school our friendship group separated, I was left with my best friend and another friend. My best friend drifted apart a few years ago and the other friend I drifted away from earlier this year (we hadn’t caught up since February last year and I always felt our conversations were the same/couldn’t speak deeply with her). Now I have no friends and no partner either. Every time I’m in a social setting I’m always thinking about what I’m lacking, what I’ve lost with my best friend. It’s not fair of me to blame everything on her, I don’t, but I could confide absolutely everything to her and now I don’t really have that. With work, it’s the same mundane tasks and routine. I have no motivation, no challenges, I’m not in an industry that I’m passionate about. With that, I don’t do anything during the week. Monday-Friday is work and on the weekends I stay home and read since I have nobody to catch up with (I genuinely do like reading). I am incredibly close with my brother but he’ll be married within the next few years and I’m afraid I won’t leave the house and instead will isolate myself. I know it’s contradictory but I can’t see anyone because I don’t want my family knowing how lonely I feel. I’ve been waking up every night since January and I think the loneliness is taking a bigger toll on me than I thought.

Jaster888 I want to move on, my brain and thoughts won't let me.
  • replies: 2

I have noticed I have patterns and behaviours that never appear to go away. My wife and I were discussing our daughter this morning and that she has many traits for what we call ADHD. Whats interesting is how easy it can be to recognise behaviours in... View more

I have noticed I have patterns and behaviours that never appear to go away. My wife and I were discussing our daughter this morning and that she has many traits for what we call ADHD. Whats interesting is how easy it can be to recognise behaviours in others and not always oneself. I am in my 50's and for the past 20-years have struggled with living a purposeful life filled with meaningful work and a healthy social network of friends. If I am honest I have neither. I dont have any people I would call friends as I have consciously removed myself from those who were in my life. Work has been a disaster and I on good faith have networked extensively to find suitable opportunities and they never truly work out or I quickly lose interest. Last year I became a Christian, got saved, started hanging out with a few people from there and as always it faded away. I recognise that I have core areas that are not or have never been in true harmony and when issues arise in my work (which is my achillees heel), I go backwards. Like I said to my wife this morning as lots of things came flooding to my brain, I just want to be at peace. My family situaltion is so complicated I dont have the energy or time to go there. I have been in denial that this is always under the surface and I dont know how to find peace with them all. The key pople who are all still alive and live within a 10-30km radius from me are: Mother, Father (Separated), both married 3 x times. I have zero emotion or feelings towards either. Half Brother...also on his second marriage. He has 2 x girls (nieces).Step Sister who I was very close to. We are talking 10 - 15+ years I have had little to no contact and I know its crushed my soul. When so much time has passed and you (think) you no longer have any feelings for them, I often wonder why would I want to connect. To meand any old wounds? To clarify things? I would rather not and honestly couldnt care less if I saw any of them again while I remain on this earth. Frustratingly, I know I have not healed from the trauma connected to each and every one of them and I dont know what to do. Thanks for listening and reading this far if you stayed with me. God bless. Whats interesting was when I lived on the other side of the Country and HAD a dream job and lifetsyle, I was way too busy and fuillfilled that none of these people mattered. Now I am closer I

ecomama Three self-care things you did today!
  • replies: 1672

We can do it BBers, we can do self-care. Sleepy21 pointed out research that shows self-care REALLY helps! Please share what you do for self-care so we can get inspiration, ideas and motivation to do it too. Best wishes EM

We can do it BBers, we can do self-care. Sleepy21 pointed out research that shows self-care REALLY helps! Please share what you do for self-care so we can get inspiration, ideas and motivation to do it too. Best wishes EM

Akitagirl landlord issues
  • replies: 2

hi all,I've been struggling with my landlord over the past month. everything seemed fine but last month she gave me a notice for a rent increase, $100 per week , so now from $350 its gone to $450 per week. she knows I'm on Centrelink benefits so now ... View more

hi all,I've been struggling with my landlord over the past month. everything seemed fine but last month she gave me a notice for a rent increase, $100 per week , so now from $350 its gone to $450 per week. she knows I'm on Centrelink benefits so now she's basically asking for 90% of my benefit. i did have $200 per week to live on, but now that's shifted to $100 per week, I also have a dog. so I'm not sure how I'm going to afford it. she handed me the notice and walked off and since then I've noticed an unmistakeable change in her demeanour. she gives me one word answers to texts and has changed her routine to basically avoid me at all costs. I don't know what I've done wrong. last week I was away, overseas and my gut told me to lock the house up and take a photo of the door when I left. i put a piece of grass in the door jam so I would know if anyone had been in the house.I got back today , took another photo, and sure enough the grass was missing and the curtains had been moved. only someone with keys could have entered, so I'm 100% sure it was her. I don't know what to do. if i confront her, she's likely to say I threatened her, she doesn't feel safe or whatever, and have me removed immediately. I don't want that. if I say nothing, I live with the knowledge that she comes and goes in my house which is illegal. I really don't know what to do at this stage. I don't want to move back to my husbands house, (which is an option) but comes with its own challenges.... (my god its a slum now, since I left it).... I also dont want to live in my car with my dog. thoughts?

Catawasers I dont think anything really makes me happy anymore
  • replies: 3

Hello, my name's Cat. I just turned 29, so I feel a bit stupid doing this, I really thought I'd be better by now. I struggle with going to therapy, it's really hard and my brain always cuts my appointments short, and I end up quitting, I wish I dont ... View more

Hello, my name's Cat. I just turned 29, so I feel a bit stupid doing this, I really thought I'd be better by now. I struggle with going to therapy, it's really hard and my brain always cuts my appointments short, and I end up quitting, I wish I dont do that, but I dont know how or why my brain just stops me from going. My cousins wedding was a couple months ago, and I am beyond happy for her! I feel horrible thought because i started thinking about how nice it'd be for me to experience something like this, but I fear that I am Aromantic, I dont think I'd ever be able to love someone like that. Not that I'm unable to BE loved, but unable to feel it. It hurt a lot that they had a teacher from high-school, for some reason upset me a lot, my head immediately thought "I wish I had a mentor figure like that that had cared enough to stay like that"We went to the same school, and a lot of the teachers disliked me and I had struggled with a lot. Of course I am happy for my cousin! It just made me really reevaluate and somewhat hate myself moreso. I feel selfish and I know I risk posting this, but this is how I feel. I love my cousin a lot but I feel so bad, I have dreams all the time, and I'm so full of shame that any opportunity to see my family I freak out at and avoid. I dont know why I'm posting this, I've been diagnosed with bpd/cptsd, which i think caused me to have a bad dream about the situation. How do you fix things when you're already older and should have it figured out already? I barely know enough about myself. Sorry again if I seem selfish, I dont know why I'm like this.

amd1953 Beyond the Blue Horizon
  • replies: 92

I sense that I am approaching the blue horizon. Even so, it retreats further away from me as if trying to conceal something important from me. What is there to hide that is worth so much subterfuge? What is it I need to know in this final stage of li... View more

I sense that I am approaching the blue horizon. Even so, it retreats further away from me as if trying to conceal something important from me. What is there to hide that is worth so much subterfuge? What is it I need to know in this final stage of life? Who knows? Who cares? Well, I certainly do. I want to understand everything that comes my way whether it is meant for me or not. Life is short enough without the sensation of feeling cheated and deceived. The challenge is to discover how to cut through the nonsense that cloaks its true meaning. If I were a camel, I would feel at home in the desert. If I were a dromedary, I would, indeed, feel cheated. See Wikipedia for camels/dromedaries. Spoiler alert! A dromedary only has one hump. If I were searching for a new home, I would look to the exoplanets. Cosmologically speaking, a much better place to permanently reside. The moon would be much too close for comfort. I am thinking another galaxy would be great. Certainly within a short drive to the restaurant at the end of the universe for tea and crumpets. Like Albert Camus, I am a rebel without a cause. I choose the absurdist rather than the existentialist philosophy. Everything in this life is engineered towards those with skills, talent and the will to succeed. I have now lost sight of the blue horizon. I am in freefall back to earth where I will lie quietly in the lush meadows and star at the blue sky.amd1953

Rubaiya I don’t know
  • replies: 9

I am unable to do anything. Specially I can't study. I have assessments due. instead of doing that I am doing everything. I struggle with getting things done. Even if try to somehow starting the task I just need to do it perfectly or either not at al... View more

I am unable to do anything. Specially I can't study. I have assessments due. instead of doing that I am doing everything. I struggle with getting things done. Even if try to somehow starting the task I just need to do it perfectly or either not at all. When I can't do perfectly I just became sad and leave the task. My to do lists and never getting ticked. Even I don’t have a to do. I don’t have any list. I can't make a list. I can't plan anything. Even if I do I can't finished it. There is a lot of voices in my head. They always argue. I can specially hear two voices one is the voice of current me and another is 2 year old me. The 2 year old me to trantrums, take implusive decisions, don’t want to wait, have big emotions, meltdowns and my older self try saying no no don’t do it..Toodler me always wins and current me is just tired and frustrated now. Want to run. It feels like having a giant head on you body that gives you pain, wrong directons, confused directions. I am always confused, having multiple options in my head..Being in relationships that you know don’t serve you, But keep going for more than 10 years, there is someone is me that says stop!! this are the signs!! I do Stop.. But when I cut connections , I get implusive, even if that moment they are hiding anywhere in the world I would find them.. Don’t know what to feel, what to do, what to expect myself..I am not consistent in anything in my life.. I hate myself..I don’t deserve anything

Paw Prints Staying/Getting/Doing Well – Moving goalposts or fixed target?
  • replies: 2076

Hi, this is my first post, though I have been reading the forums for some weeks. I’m probably expressing myself badly when I say that I have found reading about other people’s journeys reassuring. Finding a community of people who “get it” even when ... View more

Hi, this is my first post, though I have been reading the forums for some weeks. I’m probably expressing myself badly when I say that I have found reading about other people’s journeys reassuring. Finding a community of people who “get it” even when they have a wide variety of experiences and lives lived is not something I thought I would ever find. Though people talk about getting well & there is a section Staying Well, I’m curious as to what this actually means to other people and how they manage their expectations. I noticed some people refer to being well as ‘being like themselves before they got ill’, whilst others don’t express an exact aim. My idea of being well has changed over the years. I was first diagnosed as an 8 year old child back in the late sixties. The doctors told Mum that the voices in my head & the sudden crying bouts were because I suffered from ‘nerves’ & I was given meds to calm me. Of course such things were not discussed back then & I was told not to talk about it to anyone, not my school friends nor siblings, just Mum. For decades after my idea of being well simply meant being able to hide my illness from others. A number of events in my life caused my illness to worsen, until some years ago I became so ill I needed to be hospitalised for my own safety. This lead to my current diagnosis of Major Depression, Anxiety & PTSD. I’m no longer in that dark place, but each day is still a battle (though I can now believe in a future). For now only my siblings & one friend know about my illness, though some things they still don’t know. So, what does ‘being well’ mean to me, it is ever moving goalposts. If you had asked me 5 years ago would I be as well as I am now I would have thought it impossible as I couldn’t envision a future. If you had asked me last week (during one of my down periods) I would have said my progress was all an illusion & I was fooling myself that things can get better. For now my idea of being well is being able to believe that things can change for the better, that I will one day be able to manage the everyday things like housework, caring for myself & caring for my dog & maybe, just maybe I will even be able to enjoy myself. Paw Prints **I took the tip to give myself time to write my post by writing on a word doc & then paste it.

sherlocks Injured Mental Health Worker
  • replies: 4

Hello I am a work place injured victim. Is there anyone out there that is similar and what’s your experience with the work cover system. I would love to hear from anyone going through work cover and there recovery? Support experience. I am a complete... View more

Hello I am a work place injured victim. Is there anyone out there that is similar and what’s your experience with the work cover system. I would love to hear from anyone going through work cover and there recovery? Support experience. I am a complete example of a Broken System that has been abusing me for twenty years now. Suffering my injury I have been slaughtered stripped of human decency life. My treatment is a very serious urgent concern and I really would love to hear from anyone. thank you dead girl walking

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