Immediate support
Immediate support

Staying well

Support each other to stay well, from mindfulness, sleep, diet and exercise to reducing drug and alcohol use and coping with difficult emotions.

Start a discussion

FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

View the FAQ

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

View the guidelines
Jump to
Community Manager
You can win one of five $100 gift cards. Complete our survey by 5pm, 27 June 2025 AEST to enter the draw. Your response will be anonymous so you can't be identified.
Start a discussion

Pinned discussions

Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

All discussions

Start a discussion

Paw Prints Staying/Getting/Doing Well – Moving goalposts or fixed target?
  • replies: 1763

Hi, this is my first post, though I have been reading the forums for some weeks. I’m probably expressing myself badly when I say that I have found reading about other people’s journeys reassuring. Finding a community of people who “get it” even when ... View more

Hi, this is my first post, though I have been reading the forums for some weeks. I’m probably expressing myself badly when I say that I have found reading about other people’s journeys reassuring. Finding a community of people who “get it” even when they have a wide variety of experiences and lives lived is not something I thought I would ever find. Though people talk about getting well & there is a section Staying Well, I’m curious as to what this actually means to other people and how they manage their expectations. I noticed some people refer to being well as ‘being like themselves before they got ill’, whilst others don’t express an exact aim. My idea of being well has changed over the years. I was first diagnosed as an 8 year old child back in the late sixties. The doctors told Mum that the voices in my head & the sudden crying bouts were because I suffered from ‘nerves’ & I was given meds to calm me. Of course such things were not discussed back then & I was told not to talk about it to anyone, not my school friends nor siblings, just Mum. For decades after my idea of being well simply meant being able to hide my illness from others. A number of events in my life caused my illness to worsen, until some years ago I became so ill I needed to be hospitalised for my own safety. This lead to my current diagnosis of Major Depression, Anxiety & PTSD. I’m no longer in that dark place, but each day is still a battle (though I can now believe in a future). For now only my siblings & one friend know about my illness, though some things they still don’t know. So, what does ‘being well’ mean to me, it is ever moving goalposts. If you had asked me 5 years ago would I be as well as I am now I would have thought it impossible as I couldn’t envision a future. If you had asked me last week (during one of my down periods) I would have said my progress was all an illusion & I was fooling myself that things can get better. For now my idea of being well is being able to believe that things can change for the better, that I will one day be able to manage the everyday things like housework, caring for myself & caring for my dog & maybe, just maybe I will even be able to enjoy myself. Paw Prints **I took the tip to give myself time to write my post by writing on a word doc & then paste it.

blondguy Do You Like Yourself? Your Thoughts are Welcome!
  • replies: 4030

Hello Everybody and new posters especially:-) I have had anxiety since 1983 and depression from 1997. There is always someone that says 'You have to Love Yourself' before recovery. When people are suffering from anxiety/depression this may be the las... View more

Hello Everybody and new posters especially:-) I have had anxiety since 1983 and depression from 1997. There is always someone that says 'You have to Love Yourself' before recovery. When people are suffering from anxiety/depression this may be the last 'advice' they really need. This is only my experience when I am 'advised to love myself' to rebuild my life. I have heard the following from people that cant 'love themselves' which is fair enough as I am a person that cant either. Your thoughts will help me and others learn from your point of view. I can only be 'gentle' to myself to heal...not love. Why should I love myself if I dont in the first place? I am in a dark place, how can I love myself? I dont deserve to love myself I am depressed...How can I love myself? I have mega anxiety attacks..what is there to love about myself? I hate myself and what I stand for...why should I? I love my partner more...I will care about myself 'later' When people have depression/anxiety/denial they dont need to be counseled with ' love yourself'. Thats a huge ask. I dont need to climb Mt Everest by trying to love myself when I cant. It can be an unrealistic and even silly target to achieve having depression I just prefer to be 'gentle' to myself. Same results and way less stress Your thoughts/opinions are more than welcome Thankyou so much Paul

Thelongestroad How to reconnect with people and regain social interaction/make new friends/connections
  • replies: 35

Hi im a 37 year old single man struggling to regain a social life again due to a combination of things such as depression, unemployment, addiction, jail. And life constantly being disrupted and set back time and time again. im constantly isolated fro... View more

Hi im a 37 year old single man struggling to regain a social life again due to a combination of things such as depression, unemployment, addiction, jail. And life constantly being disrupted and set back time and time again. im constantly isolated from people as i live alone. I just feel stuck in life. I wish I could find a way to meet someone and build a new life but I don’t know how.. I’ve drifted apart from all my friends and family but want to move forward and want to life a fulfilling life but struggling with not only being unemployed but poor and depressed and lonely. I’m just tired of living that way I want to live a more fulfilling life but struggling with direction not knowing where to start.

CMF Meditation, Manifesting, Gratitude & The Law of Attraction
  • replies: 733

Hi everyone, Not sure where to start so hope I can express myself clearly and maybe with others' input we can expand on this. I'm interested in people's thoughts/ experience with meditation, manifesting, gratitude & the law of attraction. I've recent... View more

Hi everyone, Not sure where to start so hope I can express myself clearly and maybe with others' input we can expand on this. I'm interested in people's thoughts/ experience with meditation, manifesting, gratitude & the law of attraction. I've recently started using the Smiling Mind app to meditate when going to sleep and sometimes when feeling a little anxious, like tonight. It is something i thought i could never do as my mind rarely stops, however, with persistence, I find I enjoy it. I guess i tend to have a negative mindset which I am determined to change.I always felt uneasy about thinking positive things as i thought i would jinx myself, and that whenever I made a positive comment or felt happy it would go wrong or something negative would happen. So i refrained from allowing myself to be too happy, I guess to 'protect' myself. Recently i have been feeling happier, stronger, expressing gratitude and taking note of when things have come to me when i needed them. Coincidence, or answers to what i put out to the Universe? I like to think the latter. A work colleague one day told me to manifest something i wanted, put it out to the universe , so I'm trying. Example, recently we needed to measure the floor space at reception so we could calculate how many people we could have in at one time. I needed a tape measure, which i did not have. At that moment our handyman walked into the office. Guess what he had? I am getting into the habit of practising positive thinking instead of thinking/expecting negatives. If something 'negative' does crop up, it can be dealt with, it's not the end of the world. I look for the positive in every negative situation. I am becoming more aware of being grateful for little things, things like getting a good car park at work, a warn cosy bed, a tidy house. I feel when i am expressing gratitude I am putting positive thoughts out into the universe and I notice more positives instead of focusing on negatives. Late last week we had internet issues at work and a colleague i found a little annoying. I've been feeling very drained, agitated, negative for a few days. This morning things were not running smoothly for me. A result of my negative mind perhaps? Little things became a big deal, my morning was crap. If i look back, it wasn't really an issue, i just did things in a different order which gave me more relax time this evening. The Law of Attraction, positive thoughts, positive experiences. What are your thoughts? cmf x

Sherpp How do I know if I'm faking a personality disorder?
  • replies: 2

Hai, I'm 16, this is kind of a long vent I guess n some of this probably won't make any sense, and I have no idea if this fits the like forum website guidelines or not either so if ur confused I can probably clarify, and ive tried my best to be as ho... View more

Hai, I'm 16, this is kind of a long vent I guess n some of this probably won't make any sense, and I have no idea if this fits the like forum website guidelines or not either so if ur confused I can probably clarify, and ive tried my best to be as honest and considerate about possible alternatives Usually I'd try to be honest, and I know the things I can do and the way I act can seem outlandish or distressing, but people label me as solely doing or feeling all of those things for some kind of shock purpose? I mean I know I can be cruel sometimes, like since I was basically 7 I used to immediately want to hurt whoever hurt my feelings soo my mum basically just got me tested for whatever neurodivergent stuff she could, and I have ADHD and like a really low thing of autism that barely even counts, and I guess you could argue most of my violent impulse control was just my ADHD or something, but as I kind of got older it felt like I was kind of getting meaner, like I had a dog my aunt had n I used to pull her ears or choke and squeeze her until I heard her screaming... and now that I'm a little older I've had a few run in withs police and been admitted to hospital for mental crisis shit, like I smashed a car window by accident and it cut my arm all up. and besides all of that total psychopath textbook definition stuff I've had like a lot of trouble with work commitments and at school, I got suspended several times at the same school for 'bullying and threatening staff and other students' among just being late to class or skipping n minor uniform infractions, one point they just told me they couldn't have me for the rest of the year unless I had ADHD medication and opted to have me held back... Anyway during this time my aunts dog, the same one I basically tortured had died and my mother had a heart attack so I was moved to a group home until she was physically fit enough to care for me again... anyway the group home I stayed at wasn't really that bad I guess, besides the kid who threatened who stab me to death after I smashed up his tv and started beating him up after he tried to push me over; it was actually just really standard. Even though I ran away in the middle of the night and walked like half way to the other side of the city 3 times, and at one point I just stood on a ledge and said I'd kill myself on a helpline n they called police to drag me down. Actually I ran away when I was living with my mother a lot too, whenever her boyfriend was kinda mean to me I guess, I mean at one point I came up with a story and said that he was abusive and hit me and my brother' I mean he did ACTUALLY hit my brother but honestly I can tell within myself he really wasn't that bad to me..? Or I guess he was that bad to me... so court believed me and had me also moved out of my mothers house, on top of the heart attack shit actually it was like a huge comorbid excuse to disown me... anyway I said he was hitting me and stuff to my counsellor and they took it seriously and my mum was all upset at me driving to court n I had to present there with my brother, who honestly might be more insane than me I guess bcus he used to try and hit my mum and stab us n he stole stuff and took drugs and was always crying over his friend trying to kill themself. He said I tried to drown him in our pool lots growing up though, I cant deny or agree bcus I dont remember. And besides all of that traumatic shit, like my dad also divorcing my mother and having a HUGE custody battle over me and my brother trying to say I was kidnapped n trying to basically deport me I had a weird amount of internet access, like I think I was honestly molested or groomed online but I don't rlly care, like I found communities and met real people and I saw a scary amount of like real car accidents and people being shot to death. Anyway just now that I think about it, how I process it all, even though maybe at one point I was faking a personality disorder or something I GENUINELY think I might have one now, not like It's really distressing to think about or anything, I mean it would b kinda cool to have it like a funny sitcom personality trait, but because Ive been bragging about thinking I have one any actual counsellor I've met already dismisses any kinda conversation I bring up relating it bcus I've "tried to hard to fake one..." like I feel like the more I unravel and learn about myself, and how I just process my own life, other peoples feelings their humanity and everything... I feel like I genuinely maybe do actually have something there... and I also really don't wanna stab someone and go to jail,

Guest_88286063 Self hatred and Anger snaps
  • replies: 2

Hi, I am having trouble with anger. The anger is explosive, destructive and aimed at myself.my anger is mostly directed at inanimate objects. I’ve destroyed phones, laptops, glasses and plates. My anger is always when I’m by myself. I also hurt mysel... View more

Hi, I am having trouble with anger. The anger is explosive, destructive and aimed at myself.my anger is mostly directed at inanimate objects. I’ve destroyed phones, laptops, glasses and plates. My anger is always when I’m by myself. I also hurt myself by banging my head. I think it’s because I believe I’m useless. I have reached out and spoken to someone at BB today. This is the first time of reached out for help with anger.

Anon0 Functional Addict
  • replies: 1

Been on drugs for 6 months now, everyday, keeping up the appearance that everything is all good ie eating, sleeping (max 6 hours a night)working, and working out, I’m only 25, I hate myself. I can’t face my friends so I make new ‘drug’ friends and wo... View more

Been on drugs for 6 months now, everyday, keeping up the appearance that everything is all good ie eating, sleeping (max 6 hours a night)working, and working out, I’m only 25, I hate myself. I can’t face my friends so I make new ‘drug’ friends and work is as you can imagine not great. I’ve been in this position before but just hadn’t been smoking for as long, any tips/advice to staying off the shit? I’m calling in sick rather frequently now just because I can’t be bothered and am too cooked, which is not what I want to be remembered as to people. I love drugs, all of them, my life has and does revolve around them, socialising without them seems weird and just boring. I need to tell my parents and friends what I’ve been doing and that I need help but there’s such a stigma with some drugs and as a male it is hard to talk about our deeper darker secrets. Any advice would be appreciated, this site seems good, hopefully someone sees this before Monday oh also my paranoia is through the bloody roof, I use drugs to combat it and trying to use drugs to get me out of this hole but it’s just easier to reload..

quirkywords Is positivity always helpful.?
  • replies: 89

In the last decade there has bee a big emphasis on being positive all the time. I have had a problem with this and now I am reading articles that agree with me that in some instances being over positive can not be appropriate or even helpful. How can... View more

In the last decade there has bee a big emphasis on being positive all the time. I have had a problem with this and now I am reading articles that agree with me that in some instances being over positive can not be appropriate or even helpful. How can positivity be extreme you may ask? Positivity has a time and place, and if ill timed or relied on in an inappropriate situation, positivity has the potential to be dangerous. However it can be harmful to relationships, particularly when a person is struggling and their partner pushes them to “look on the bright side” without listening to what they are feeling. What do you think? So are ok when someone tells you to look at what you have and not to complain? Or do you find when you are telling people how you are feeling that they don’t listen and tell you to be grateful, that you get annoyed. Let me know what you think. Is there a time and place for positivity?

Jadefire Anger issues
  • replies: 1

I’ve been struggling with anger issues, and only recently I’ve decided to reach out about it, I’ve had many friendships end over one petty argument I’ve blown way out of proportion in a lot of online forums between 2022-2024, I’m worried about hurtin... View more

I’ve been struggling with anger issues, and only recently I’ve decided to reach out about it, I’ve had many friendships end over one petty argument I’ve blown way out of proportion in a lot of online forums between 2022-2024, I’m worried about hurting people verbally both online and in-person, whenever I have an outburst, I feel like I’m a passenger in my body as this terrifying out of control side of me takes over in the driver’s seat, it’s been a massive hindrance on my mental health, cognitive functions and communication skills since my early teen years Any coping strategies are welcome

Love Seeking answers
  • replies: 1

Anyone felt like you stuck in life? Doubt yourself? Felt you are useless and worthless? Don’t know what to do? Where to go? Failing in relationships failing in career failing in self improvement? I’m scared of being lost?

Anyone felt like you stuck in life? Doubt yourself? Felt you are useless and worthless? Don’t know what to do? Where to go? Failing in relationships failing in career failing in self improvement? I’m scared of being lost?