Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

This space discusses suicide and self-harm. Consider limiting the time you spend here. To use the section safely, read the pinned discussion.

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Sophie_M Do you have a safety plan?
  • replies: 92

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts wi... View more

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

Sophie_M PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section
  • replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to h... View more

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. ​This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

All discussions

GB3000 Correctional Services toxic workplace
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone, I’d like to tell you my story of how I was a victim of workplace bullying. I worked for the department of correctional services in a high security prison. I have been with the department for well over 7 years and have seen some very inte... View more

Hi everyone, I’d like to tell you my story of how I was a victim of workplace bullying. I worked for the department of correctional services in a high security prison. I have been with the department for well over 7 years and have seen some very interesting things. I’m a 6 ft 31 year old man of aboriginal heritage. During my years with the service, I have been assaulted, threatened to be killed, have had piss and shit thrown at me, all these things have happened to me but I accepted it as part of my job, dealing with the worst of society. But nothing has brought me to my knees as bad as being victim to cruel and inhumane workplace bullying at the hands of my work colleagues. Just recently my ex girlfriend had taken her life due to circumstances I can’t comment on and it’s left me in a state of grief, thoughts of whether I’m to blame for her demise and could I have done more to help her. I had found some sort of level of peace and had come to terms with it after a few months. Until one day, I decided to have lunch at the staff, the first time I have been to the staff mess since the passing of my ex. I was sitting down enjoying a nice hot bowl of soup when my supervisor walks in. He immediately begins to crack his jokes and dark humour, takes one look over at me and says “Geez mate, you’ve got a pretty shit track record of women” and I pause and say “How’s that mate? To which he replies “Well you’ve gotten one pregnant and ya last one killed herself” those words completely breached my thick skin and cut into my soul, it was as if I was glued to my seat, I couldn’t move I couldn’t speak when all I wanted to do was get up and leave. To end this conversation my supervisor laughs and said “I bet you raped her to? I was In complete and utter shock! I knew this man for 7 years of my working career in corrections, he was like a mentor, a friend, a brother whom I had confided in during the loss of my ex. He used it all against me to grandstand himself in front of all our peers at the staff mess. I wrote him up the next day which is a cardinal sin according to the Blue shirt code. It still hasn’t given me peace and has caused nothing but anxiety and worry! I can’t sleep and I’m not eating, I feel so on edge all the time. I’m hoping this investigation will give me clarity. Thank you for allowing me to voice this story. Anyone else have a similar story?

allthecolours It shouldn’t be this hard
  • replies: 2

Hello I am struggling to find hope and I don’t know why it is so hard. I have just come out of a long term relationship with the man I thought I would end up with. I moved cities, forgave lies, forgave him when he left me in a room to do drugs while ... View more

Hello I am struggling to find hope and I don’t know why it is so hard. I have just come out of a long term relationship with the man I thought I would end up with. I moved cities, forgave lies, forgave him when he left me in a room to do drugs while I had an abortion, calling the police while I had a cigarette to avoid his alcohol psychosis - due to the constant begging for forgiveness and the empty promises. All of it took years of recovery and ended when he told me he couldn’t deal with his actions and he wasn’t okay when he entered the relationship. He tried still but I couldn’t be with someone who was unsure he could be with me and wanted to set himon a path to find his happiness as he expressed. A bruised ego shows no soul and no respect, or so it seems. I now find myself leaving the home I created with nowhere of my own to go, a career that suffered at the expense of his and am now being sexually harassed at work. I have no energy left to keep on trying. I tried for so long. Why won’t this end? All I can think about is the peace of death but my family would never recover. I don’t really know what I’m asking for other than a safe space and hopefully some helpful words, because I can’t go on like this. everyday I think about death and every day I breathe, I feel like the oxygen is almost gone

Centaured The constant struggle.
  • replies: 241

Why do I wake with thoughts of wanting to die...the struggle of the previous day hasn't stopped and it has already started from the moment my eyes open and will last til I close them again and then continue to go on until sleep takes me or I give in.... View more

Why do I wake with thoughts of wanting to die...the struggle of the previous day hasn't stopped and it has already started from the moment my eyes open and will last til I close them again and then continue to go on until sleep takes me or I give in. I have found nothing really seems to give me relief from these thoughts. So what is so bad about my life you may ask. What is so wrong or bad my existence that is the only thing ever in my head. Well nothing really, so I don't know why I want to die. I just do. I just need every to stop. I want the only permanent solution to my life. I'm tired of dealing with this all the time. I'm tired of fighting that person in my head that tells me to do it. I'm just tired.

Chris_Tas Suicidal constantly
  • replies: 247

Hi all. Like others I think of suicide basically constantly. It's like a someone whispering in me ear that I can't stop as my life otherwise is (mostly) ok. I told my parents again but they just said Im an attention seeker that using it as an excuse ... View more

Hi all. Like others I think of suicide basically constantly. It's like a someone whispering in me ear that I can't stop as my life otherwise is (mostly) ok. I told my parents again but they just said Im an attention seeker that using it as an excuse not to work. That is far from the trust as when I tell them I'm suicidal they laugh and then get angry. It's so difficult as it makes my suicidal thoughts worse but they seem completely oblivious. Anyway stay safe all. Chris

Bbydoll I hate this time of year & everything about my life
  • replies: 133

I'm suffering from chronic pain issues; auto immune related issues and a body that is basically falling apart. I have no family around except for a brother (and sister in law,and niece), who would rather spend time with their friends - even though I ... View more

I'm suffering from chronic pain issues; auto immune related issues and a body that is basically falling apart. I have no family around except for a brother (and sister in law,and niece), who would rather spend time with their friends - even though I pushed myself to be there for their daughters birthday. My teeth are rotting because of pain meds and I have no way of paying for them to be fixed.. some are now are in my smile line and the idea of loosing teeth there destroys me. My extended family wanted me to join them on Christmas day except for the fact it would be just breakfast as they want to visit their significant others family (not to mention it's a 4 hour round trip for me on public transport on a public holiday), and I can barely function as I'm suffering from tinnitus and vertigo at the moment on top of my usual health issues. I'm struggling to get through to the rest of the year. I've been reaching out via text message to my closest friend - but he's been avoiding me. My other friend just doesn't believe how bad my mental state is; despite having her own issues with depression and suicide. Every year is another year where nothing is achieved and my "bucket list" is further away from ever happening. Even on the rare occasions I'm out socializing; people avoid me. I seem to just repel people. Having had years and years of people leaving me, it's not like I haven't tried - organizing parties at my place; inviting friends out for a girls night out etc... no one ever bothers returning the favor. No one checks up on me. My online friends only respond to me messaging them - and even that's not a guarantee of a reply. I'm tired of struggling with no support. I'm not living, I'm barely surviving. .. it's like I'm not even here. And I'm sure it wouldn't matter if I wasn't because people in my life just don't seem to care! And it's not like I have anything keeping me here - no partner, no kids, no pets. . Nothing at all.

Shy_beyond_all_reason When family say hurtful things. Trigger warning *mention of suicide
  • replies: 6

So I was having a discussion with my parents about something I had just read about. Mum doesn't want to hear about anything that goes against the covid narrative but that's just for reference. Anyway mum asked me where I was getting my info from but ... View more

So I was having a discussion with my parents about something I had just read about. Mum doesn't want to hear about anything that goes against the covid narrative but that's just for reference. Anyway mum asked me where I was getting my info from but knowing that would start an argument I didn't answer. Dad and I kept talking about the topic at hand. Mum then said to me, why don't you s%^$# yourself and then you won't have to worry about it I love my Mum more than life itself but I couldn't believe she would say such a thing! She doesn't know I struggle with self harm or that I have been suicidal in the past but what a thing to say to your child even if they are an adult.Thankfully I have an appointment with my psych next Monday so I can move past this but I just needed to tell someone as her comment has triggered me and I just need to write this out.I don't mean any malice or anger towards my Mum, I still love her I'm just really hurt and shocked by it.

ladus You ever feel like life is meaningless at a base level
  • replies: 4

Like given how insignificant all of this is what’s the point? im not at the end of my rope but it seems like if you want to get anywhere with mental healthcare you have you be busting into the emergency room threatening to off yourself there and then... View more

Like given how insignificant all of this is what’s the point? im not at the end of my rope but it seems like if you want to get anywhere with mental healthcare you have you be busting into the emergency room threatening to off yourself there and then and MABYE theyll give you a spot on the waitlist its got me thinking mabye they’ve got the right idea, life’s clearly not scared to the powers at be so why bother, all just seems like we are keeping going because that’s what someone else wants us to do, why can’t I just take the long nap and try my luck at whatever comes next?

nib Poor Mental Health... Again.
  • replies: 3

Living with this condition is terrible. I'm only 24. I feel like I was born with it, and that it is slowly getting worse as time goes on. I am experiencing severe side effects from the medication that I am taking, and absolutely nobody will listen to... View more

Living with this condition is terrible. I'm only 24. I feel like I was born with it, and that it is slowly getting worse as time goes on. I am experiencing severe side effects from the medication that I am taking, and absolutely nobody will listen to my concerns in regards to this. I clearly have no purpose here - so ending my life could be an option, although I don't want to do it. No one wants to be friends with me/be my boyfriend either because I am not NT. And before people ask, yes, I am seeking help for my Schizophrenia - from an excellent psychiatrist and psychotherapist. But unfortunately, my psychiatrist is moving on to a different mental health centre at some point in the near future and I am going to struggle again. I am hoping to seek psychological assistance from the head psychiatrist of the state, at my local mental health centre - boy aren't I lucky? On top of that, my mother is a perfectionist and my father has no understanding of mental health - even though they both suffer from it. I am often at fault for a lot of things - such as my parents drinking and gambling problems. I've also been reminded consistently that I need to move out of home so that I am basically not a nuisance to my parents anymore. I have been having nightmares about my mother and I arguing. I have self-harmed. I was bullied in school about my hair. I've been groomed and I had another man lead me on, making me believe that he had he liked me for me when really, he is a narcissist who has a ex-wife and daughter on the side. I have tried to be a bit more extroverted, to no avail. I am sick of being rejected. I also tried receiving closure about something from a psychic medium. She turned out to be a charlatan, and she ripped off a family member of mine, taking her money as well. I have had a gutful.

PocketRocket88 Constantly in this negative train
  • replies: 24

TW Suicidal ideations, urges I honestly don't know where else to get help from... My local hospital seemed to not take the necessary step to help me out with my problem... Whenever I present to their ED they just do all the ED stuff and then just dis... View more

TW Suicidal ideations, urges I honestly don't know where else to get help from... My local hospital seemed to not take the necessary step to help me out with my problem... Whenever I present to their ED they just do all the ED stuff and then just discharges me even when I still pose a risk to myself... I even verbalise to them directly that I am not safe to go home... I feel so rejected and defeated right now... I'm actually afraid to go home nowadays coz of how strong my ideations and urges are lately... Plus how vivid these ideations are... I have community mental health support but I just feel that I'm not supported enough or for them my problem is not as bad as I feel or imagine it to be... I feel like I'm going more mental and that I'm making all these things up... The only way I sort off have to keep myself safe is by either forcing myself to sleep as soon as I get home or if I'm just at home OR I have to keep busy with work (which depends on how much shift they'd give me)... I am trying to take on a new hobby which is bejewelling a portrait of a rose that I bought in Big W the other day... I can only do so much, so what do I do when I ran out of options to distract myself? Or what do I do when I'm so stuck in my head that I can't stop myself from going thru the plan which btw is always in play it's just a matter of trying to put it off every waking day... ive been diagnosed with Borderline personality disorder, depression and anxiety. I was on meds but due to conflicting information between different doctors I decided to stop taking them for months now... Due to a very limited number of psychology sessions under Medicare, I had to spread my appointment very thin specially now that I'm only left with 4-5 sessions for the year... Just got approved for NDIS funding just waiting for the allocation of budget. I have a community mental health support worker that's under my local hospital... Even with all these I still feel unheard, ignored and/or not taken seriously specially when my suicide plan is pretty serious... Also I live alone so if I do anything without telling someone no one would ever know... It scares me a little bit but each time I get rejected and ignored my fear seemed to slowly disappears and I know that one day I won't be scared I. Feeling this way because I feel exhausted

BobbyOz Suicide help
  • replies: 2

I’ve got so many problems in my life caused by anxiety. I’m underweight and can’t eat much without nausea. I get panic attacks every day. I can’t get my driving license because I get panic attacks while driving which means I also can’t get a job. I f... View more

I’ve got so many problems in my life caused by anxiety. I’m underweight and can’t eat much without nausea. I get panic attacks every day. I can’t get my driving license because I get panic attacks while driving which means I also can’t get a job. I failed University and am in huge debt. I always get rejected by women. I have no friends. What should I do? I’m on medication and I’ve seen tons of psychologists but nothing seems to work. I feel like ending my life.