Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

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Do you have a safety plan?

replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section

replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

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Passive suicidal behaviour

replies: 9

When you dont want your family to know the truth about how you feel or you just want to ensure your family are provided for then passive suicide is what you move into . To increase the risk of harm so that it was an accident is the explanation given.Are passive suicidal thoughts worse than active suicidal thoughts? Because they are so well hidden and masked they are unseen and passed over . When life just is too much ? Thoughts ?

I'm Scared

replies: 3

So I woke up today, people say if you wake up then it's a good day, I'm not convinced. I can't bring myself to talk to anyone about this as yet not even my phycologist, that might change before my next appointment maybe not. I had an episode this morning after waking up where I was laying in bed feeling shit and sorry for myself, feeling worthless, unwanted all the normal feelings. I sat there crying and running through my head all the people that say when they hear that you're going through a tough time just reach out. You know what reaching out is the last thing I feel like doing burdening people with my shit. To be honest if they really cared why wouldn't they pick the phone up or jump in the car and check in, my reasoning is they just don't care. My family that I put so much love into really don't give two shits about me either the grandchildren that I adore wouldn't remember me anyway so all this running through my head the devil on the shoulder telling me fuck it just do it end it all. This time the angels voice was silent so I attempted to do so... it scared the shit out of me and then I stopped myself. I still don't know why I got to this point again or why I stopped myself I just hate where I am and I want it to stop. I'm sick of hearing how I can fix it I just don't have the bloody energy anymore. Thanks for listening.

Without Cause

replies: 1

Hi, I've never put my story out for any to read or have thoughts on except my pyhcologist. I had a work place injury in August of 2022 that required surgery which I had in Feb 23. Between those two dates I started a new job and with the injury came a whole new world of not being able to do anything that I was doing and enjoying previously. I had hobbies like gym, pistol shooting and umpiring AFL not to mention all the household duties you preform without a moments thought. So I found myself in a hole and it was getting worse, I would go into the toilet at work sit there and just cry without reason (in my own mind anyway). This happened a couple of times and I didn't want to think to much about it, then it started happening everyday, then a couple of times a day to the point I couldn't go to work. So my doctor put me on anti depression medication and referred me to a phycologist. There I was diagnosed with adjustment disorder and severe depression, with no capacity to work my new employer let me go in the January of 23 which I couldn't blame them as I couldn't do the job they had hired me to do. I had surgery and was progressing really well until I went to host employer where I unfortunately over did it and re injured the shoulder. I was improving both mentally and physically until this point. The surgeon couldn't operate any further and recommended a shoulder joint replacement. That part of my w/cover claim ceased however I was still being treated for the mental health part as it is a secondary compaonant due to the initial injury. During that time until now I have had 2 episodes (that's what I call them) where I have found myself standing in front of all my pills as I take quite a lot of pills for pain and inflamation along with other drugs for migraine relief and prevention, shaking, crying, and wanting to end my life. I don't know how many other people have had this feeling where it's like the angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other but that's how it felt like a big fight between the 2 and so far the angel has won. I have started a new job into my 4th week and I've had 6 days off with stomach issues (stress maybe) doctor has sent me for a lot of tests so not sure what it is yet. Deep down I think since it's been 2 years that I'm just struggling with the whole normality of life and with a few other family issues on top that I also don't know how to handle I'm starting to feel like that hole is opening up and swolling me.

Disassociation, Alienation Please Help me

replies: 1

I feel I am NOT in the REAL world, I don't care about anything. this world passes. I have NO physical or financial worries but NOTHING MATTERS. I have to buy pleasurable things, get minor maintenance in my OWN home but I don't CARE. i DON'T go out of my home, Don't want to go out except grocery store, Sit on the computer. Want to travel but CAN'T leave my little dog, No relatives or friends BUT enjoy being on my own, enjoy other people but get anxious, Have tried mental health services, drugs, EVERYTHING but am walking in a 'dream'

I'm 13, and feeling like my world is collapsing.

replies: 1

I'm 13, and I do home-schooling. Me, and my mum, had a discussion about whether home-schooling would be better than normal school, because i was feeling depressed and suicidal in term 1 of this year. We agreed that it would be a good idea as my mum described it as a fun experience, due to the 'control' I'll have, and the 'activities' I can do. Fast forward to now. I've been doing home-schooling since term 2 this year, and at first It was fun. Me and my good friends were still very close as we live close to each other, and I'd still ride to school with them. Later though, during the term, I started to notice the amount of work I have to do, the lack of control I have, and the groups/activities were non-existent. This led me to questioning my mum about it, and, according to the website they were doing updates to it. I was told that they would be up soon. They are still down. The lack of freedom and people i have to communicate with, made it very hard to stay motivated to do my full-amount of school work. This inevitably led to me stressing, and struggling to make time to hang out with my friends, which have led to me feeling depressed, as this is my last year with them before they leave. I have expressed my emotions to my mum and dad, but I haven't made it exactly clear to them that I am feeling extremely depressed and suicidal. I recently re-lapsed into self harm again after almost an year without it, and I feel extremely disappointed in myself. I desperately want to tell my parents that I need help, but I'm too scared to. This has caused the following:Feeling unfit and unhealthy Not eating enough Falling behind on school workStressingAnxiety SadnessFeeling mentally sick I'm not sure how much longer I can endure this, and I'm feeling so desperate to hurt myself even more than I already am. I am also an introvert, and that makes it harder for me to communicate my emotions to other people like therapists. I feel so bad, and I'm sure my friends are sick of me having a mental breakdown In there messages at 1am all the time. I regret starting home-schooling.

my mum js died from cancer , im 12

replies: 2

what do i do i rlly wanna kms

Okay to not be okay.

replies: 7

Hi,I am at a point where I have placed myself completely inside an ice-cube. When I look back over my very 'interesting' life, I can only shake my head in amazement.When I really ask myself do I have any regrets, the most clear resounding response is ... Of course! The fact that I was born.I have had some amazing times throughout my life, but unfortunately that amazingness has lost its shine and now I am in a place of icy nothingness. I don't feel any standout emotion - just a void. It is interesting to be where I am and also very mind-boggling considering the good the bad and the shattered broken ugly that is me. I speak to a GP (but not as much as I need at the moment due to his popularity) but that in itself is a burden because I feel that he can't really help me - like anyone he can offer suggestions but any decision is ultimately mine - and I am so over trying to fix what can't be fixed. Time can't be turned back and time definitely does not heal.So where to now?

I didnt think i would be back here

replies: 1

Tw self harm and alcohol Overall, i've been better recently, lifes mostly been moving forward and things have just been better. But i still find myself falling back on bad habits on every bad day or mistake or anything that feels a little too much. I'm 17 and in year twelve, externals are stressful but that stress on top of external factors like friends, family, my future, transition to adulthood and other pointless stressors are causing my brain to crumple. self harm wise i was doing really good for a while, coming from a place were i was harming everyday and too afraid to break the cycle for being clean for over a month at a time. but now ive started more regularly again. when things started getting harder to cope with more consistently i tried to turn towards other coping mechanisms because well its getting hotter, i hate feeling ashamed of what i do to my skin and other people tend not to worry about things they cant see. So i started drinking more then the occasional time out with my friends. not everyday but every few, usually not enough to get me drunk but just something that can dull my head while i can fall asleep without worries. my parents keep spirits and gin in the top of our pantry and i've just been taking a huge mouthful at a time, ocassionally more then five. I hate to admit that i love they way it makes me feel so heavy and light at the same time and i keep finding myself more and more consumed by the thought of just having a drink to relax a bit. Alcohol abuse runs in my family. i've always been told i need to be careful and i definently am not at a point where i would consider myself an alcoholic, but i'm afraid im going down that road. i kept telling myself this is the last time and the last time, one where i drank quite a bit more then i would usually was almost two weeks ago and i havent since. but i still keep thinking about it and now i've made myself stop till after my second last exam, ive started self harming more regularly. drinking feels so easy, so invisible. but soon enough my parents will notice the near empty bottles in the cupboard. i dont want to end up where my fate and genetics are dragging me, but it feels so easy. i keep thinking a couple drinks on occassion is fine, and it is. but its the insentive around it that i know is wrong. in the evening, by myself, just to quiet my head and cope. i'm just moving from one unhealthy coping mechanism to another and i dont know how to stop it.

Help, I guess?

replies: 3

I've never posted to a forum before. I apologise if my etiquette is off. I'm 16, and I live at home with my mother and some siblings. Recently I relapsed into self-harm. I don't want to go down this road again, as it always leads to other behaviours. I don't know where to go to get confidential help without parental permission. For many complex reasons I cannot speak to them about this. I have no other family relatives or "trusted adults" in my life. I want to know how to help myself. Could anyone tell me?

its getting more difficult

replies: 2

Hi, never thought that I would next to post something in beyond blue or something similar but I think after almost 2 decades I’m at my breaking point finally. Im a male, grew up with the mantra that “boys don’t cry”, growing up I was bullied relentlessly, the type that never had friends not being able to talk to anyone about it, as the school would put the blame on me (yes the school put the blame on me) so some times the only option was self harm. During this time I became good at hiding my emotions and feelings and these days I have mastered it. When I left school something came out about a teacher. (Took me years to realise that I was in fact being groomed) as you can imagine depression and more self harm ensued. Fast forward a few years, scars heal and slowly feel better. A relationship opened my eyes up, that I don’t deal with emotion too well and I am truely a lonely person, even if there are other people around me. It’s like I don’t connect on the same way length as others. Rough breakup, leads to more mental issues + self harm. Move forward 6 or 7 years and things start to look better, get married and enjoy life a little bit. Join a volunteer Fire Brigade love every minute of it. Things move along nicely, but I started to keep a diary as I noticed in my self that I have high highs and the absolute lowest of lows and haven’t quit worked out if I’m bipolar or not yet. But move on to current day, I feel as though I am at my lowest possible low. I constantly feel numb, I feel out of place and I question my point of existence. I feel ignored and un-noticed and lonely, all of the time. I have days where they are really good then the emotions come crashing down and feel horribly low and it’s difficult to pick that back up. When I volunteer time to the brigade and local community, I feel great, working on a trail, I feel great. The moment I get in my car to go home that low hits hard. Im posting here because I feel ashamed to talk to anyone, I worry that if I talk a professional, I will get a label that will make me end up in some psych ward somewhere. It’s been a hot minute since I have self harmed, it’s defiantly been on my mind of late. They say that life starts in your 30’s but it feels like it’s ending. There is more I would add here but might keep it here for now .

Do you have a safety plan? replies: 97

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section replies: 0

Passive suicidal behaviour replies: 9

I'm Scared replies: 3

Without Cause replies: 1

Disassociation, Alienation Please Help me replies: 1

I'm 13, and feeling like my world is collapsing. replies: 1

my mum js died from cancer , im 12 replies: 2

Okay to not be okay. replies: 7

I didnt think i would be back here replies: 1

Help, I guess? replies: 3

its getting more difficult replies: 2