Tired of fighting this battle.

[Beaser]

I hope im ok to post as ive posted so often on other  forums  but im feeling very desperate lately. 

Im just so tired of fighting. I left a job i was in for many years last year. I have since had some part time work that didnt work out.  Im lonely and going broke.  I was desperate and called triple o last week only to be left to my own devices again. I may be going into a facility called parc a non acute inpatient service but that thought scares me. I dont know how much more i can endure. I hope every one is well and thank you for reading      Brett

[HelloGail]

Hello Beaser

Hope you don't mind me asking what caused you to leave your long time job last year? It must had been a hard decision? I have left so many jobs due to stress caused due to clashing with colleague/s. I had some really good jobs. I eventually was placed on DSP as it was just impossible esp as I was on medication. I was 31. Now 63 what a waste, but I had moved from the city to a small country town and it was tough competition even getting a job interview. I was happier when I was working in administrative work. Anyway, I can't turn back time. Maybe this break may help you to regain some strength.  I did try to get my job back in the city but it had been filled. I was employed there for 5 years, colleagues were great, we socialised a lot too together. I hope you are okay. Will you consider learning a course eg TAFE. I have done three courses with TAFE but have zero inspiration now at 63. I am still in my pj's and it is in late afternoon. Mothers day yesterday was too much, my daughter is estranged from me since March, blocked my number so I thought to try emailing her and she then rang but sounded reserved. It is hard when your heart is breaking and you can sense she has moved on. She is leaving Australia in 2 weeks to live in UK. I never thought we would hit this low as we were so close, right up to age 18, we would give each other a hug while watching a TV and our three dogs they were family too. They are all gone now. I am worried for my daughter as I was a good mum. I hear bad stories of some people but their kids still love them. If I did not care, I would not be so heart broken. Well we spoke yesterday, I won't pressure her but will see how tge next two weeks go. I may travel to the airport to see them off but maybe not as I keep thinking, she is free, leave her be.

[Beaser]

Hi Gail 

Thank you for your thoughtful reply and telling me a bit about yourself too.

I left my job last year due to feeling stressed by other colleagues behavior and a lack of direction. I look back and regret it ,but my mental health also began to fail and made the decision to leave.  Another cost ive had to pay from overthinking and stress.

Im currently in the process of applying for jobseeker / sickness benefit as i have a Dr certificate.   Ive just turned 57 and want work again so its all a bit scarey as im wondering can i still apply for jobs.  

Im sorry for what your going through with your daughter i have a similar situation with my sister and her daughter. I was wondering have you been able to to work since being on a DSP or is that not allowed.   Thank you again for telling me about how things are for you ..     

Maybe you can relate to me being tired and fed up with this battle and all its cost me.     Hope to talk more     Brett

[HelloGail]

Hi Brett

Thank you for your reply. 
Yes, I have worked since being on DSP, you can earn up to $180 and it won't affect your DSP but anything more, your DSP payments will reduce, it will not cancel your DSP, only reduce it. I had a casual cleaning job for a short while. Keep us posted here on how your doing. 
Gail

[HelloGail]

Hi again, Beaser

I forgot to mention, if you can get a referral to a social worker or through Mental Health, they will do an assessment and they have social workers who can help with your DSP application. I am seeing Mental Health for a few weeks and they asked me if I needed help with any paperwork but as I am already on DSP and in Social Housing, I said no thank you but it showed me just how far there social workers can go by helping you, they not only just listen but are active in your care. I hope for the best for you. It is hard doing the application on your own but if you can have a friend or family member or a social worker to help you will help take some stress out of it. Sometimes when people who are obviously disabled and are rejected the DSP, I have to wonder, did the applicant just happen to unfortunetly get a centrelink officer on a bad day? I was helping a neighbour with her DSP application, she had a lot of ailments including high anxiety. We submitted her forms and she later was given a phone assessment appointment. We were so hopeful, she had her paperwork ready on hand should she be asked anything and so on the appointed time her mobile rang and after she confirmed her identification with the accessor; the accessor said that she couldn't continue as she had left her glasses at home and she would have to cancel the interview and make another appointment. When I became aware of this, I asked my neighbour to pass me her mobile. I was angry, I said to the female assessor, my neighbour is very unwell with acute anxiety and has been waiting and looking forward to this DSP assessment for so long and you are cancelling it because you left your glasses at home! I passed the phone back to my neighbour, my outburst gave the assessor to give a little more time but another appointment was made but it wasn't until three months later it was approved. So, just warning you but your business skills may be better than mine lol.

[Beaser]

Thanks Gail  

I have to go up again today for more paperwork etc    Im getting very anxious and scared about the whole process.     Best wishes for the day  Brett.

[HelloGail]

Hi Brett

If you can manage, please keep us posted here, hoping for the best. When you write your answers, answer them in great detail, to define (I am trying to think of the right word) for example apart from naming a diagnosis, explain it's symptoms etc. best of luck 🙏 Gail

[Beaser]

Hi and thanks Gail.

I will try to be more detailed in my answers sorry about that.    I have a phone appt today between 8and 9 am  with centrelink i must admit its making me edgy.    Its for jobseeker in relation to a medical certificate my Dr wrote its for up to 24 weeks. So not the DSP at this point.

I understand your Neighbours frustration with the centrelink appt where the lady forgot her glasses i seem to find that everyone i speak to tells me something different. 

A bit more about my symptoms . I have battled severe depression/anxiety since childhood  ive been to hostpital countless times and had countless medication changes.  At the moment i spend my days on the couch only going out to do shopping or visit a friend or attend DR apointments. I will let you know how things go this morning with my appt.  Please feel free to ask anything as im happy to share.   Best wishes       Brett.

[HelloGail]

Hi Brett

That's fantastic, wish you luck but I think with your many visits to the hospital and proof of medication, and you have a letter to support this from your GP, it sounds like you will be okay, fingers and toes crossed.🙏 

Cheers, Gail🌸

[Beaser]

Im feeling quite distraught today . I seen my Dr yesterday and he believes i need to go onto the DSP .   Im 57 and worked since i was 16 and now its come to this. How do i tell people about this and what will they think of me . I just dont know how to handle this ....        Brett.