Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

This space discusses suicide and self-harm. Consider limiting the time you spend here. To use the section safely, read the pinned discussion.

FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

Pinned discussions

Sophie_M Do you have a safety plan?
  • replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts wi... View more

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

Sophie_M PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section
  • replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to h... View more

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. ​This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

All discussions

ThoughtsGetToMe I can't help it but feel helpless.
  • replies: 1

During my time in highschool, I've always thought everything would go well. But of course it won't always go well. This year, I've been attending my classes and tried my hardest to study. Until, lightning just kept striking me every single day. My cl... View more

During my time in highschool, I've always thought everything would go well. But of course it won't always go well. This year, I've been attending my classes and tried my hardest to study. Until, lightning just kept striking me every single day. My class isn't exactly the brightest... I've been experiencing situations which causes me to have low self-esteem, depression, lack of self-confidence, and refusing to do specific activities. That's what helplessness feels like, and it's caused by my classmates. Yes, of course I have reached for support to change classes. I've talked to 2 Dean Of Students/Assistant, emailed the principal, talked to my friends to support me, and my TG (tutor group/homeroom) teachers. However, none of them could help.. or were prioritising someone else. I've been crying more than usual at home and school and not wanting to go to my friends due to the fact I didn't want to seem attention-seeking. I thought of coping methods such as self-harm. Though, how is it even gonna solve my problems... No one's there to help anymore and I can only rely on nothing but share my thoughts here. I lack so much motivation for learning due to my classmates being real jerks. My ears would burst just listening to EVERY ONE OF THEIR VOICES because of how disruptive they are. Not to mention they manipulate the teachers and try to "get along" and "bond" with the teachers to get their soft side. Honestly, I can't even learn at this school anymore. My school doesn't permit racism, yet it does at the same time!? I hate this, why do I meet harder paths unintentionally? Nothing's fair.. nothing's justified... nothing can help me fix all these problems. No one helps me. I don't think anyone I know is willing to... why am I living this unjustified life? I've failed to get a grip, failed to become better... That was my goal too... I've even failed my goal, failed to learn easier, failed to stand up for myself, failed to get help...

xYuna Where to from here?
  • replies: 7

I grew up with the end goal of never living past 27, and now I am almost 31 and that scares me. I never made plans, never anticipated living this long. I moved from one country to another in hopes I could find a drive, make a plan, find a life, but i... View more

I grew up with the end goal of never living past 27, and now I am almost 31 and that scares me. I never made plans, never anticipated living this long. I moved from one country to another in hopes I could find a drive, make a plan, find a life, but it’s been a lonely existence here. Making friends - genuine friends - is hard in another country. My sense of humour is dark, my many different jobs have also been dark, and I find myself more alone than I’ve ever been. I find it hard to connect with people when the things I have seen makes me not want to waste time on superficial conversation. I just wish I could make a deep and meaningful connection. I wish I could just put the rose-tinted glasses back on and pretend that my life isn’t mundane, or for nothing. I wake up, I go to work where I sit on my own for eight hours a day, I go home and sleep - repeat. I try to get past my fear of people by going to local events, but frankly I’m so scared. People leave, and I stay where I am. I feel I am just existing. I have nothing to show for my life. No career goals, debt, friends that are in another country with their own lives to lead, people who left when they garnered something better. I am alone, utterly alone. I wasn’t meant to live this long, the constant reminder on my brain as I get closer and closer to my birthday, another year wasted. What do I do here? I am in a foreign country and I can’t keep doing this. I need help, direction - something, anything. Please.

Lilly18 Coward
  • replies: 3

Trapped in the feelings of wanting to die im ready. But something stopping me at the same time. What is this, it's torture. How do I get help when it's a 6 week wait to see my gp.

Trapped in the feelings of wanting to die im ready. But something stopping me at the same time. What is this, it's torture. How do I get help when it's a 6 week wait to see my gp.

LostMojo Just another human who's had enough of life
  • replies: 10

I'm not sure why I'm writing this. Like everything else in my life, it seems pointless. I'm posting my nonsense on a random website so that complete strangers will acknowledge and empathise with me. Nobody close to me has. Not that I've really opened... View more

I'm not sure why I'm writing this. Like everything else in my life, it seems pointless. I'm posting my nonsense on a random website so that complete strangers will acknowledge and empathise with me. Nobody close to me has. Not that I've really opened up about it. How the hell do you do that? I've pretty much decided that I've had enough of my life and it's time to leave it. I imagine those close to me being a little shocked and maybe saddened but not completely surprised that I ended my life, then carrying on like nothing happened. In time I'll be a distant memory, like an old injury. I feel tired, heavy like a burden, a waste of space, useless. Seriously, what's the point in drifting through days and nights filled with conflict, misery and feelings of hopelessness? If I went away, those around me would be free to enjoy their lives without the darkness that I bring. This is from my favourite song: "As my anger shouts at my own self-doubt, so a sadness creeps into my dreams. When you're scared of living but afraid to die, I get scared of giving and I must find the faith to beat it." But I can't...

Barnzey87 What options do I have Left?
  • replies: 3

Hi I'm not really sure what to get from this post as both myself and my mother have no real options. I currently live alone and bought my new house which I should be excited for in late December last year. But I haven't had 1 day of actually happines... View more

Hi I'm not really sure what to get from this post as both myself and my mother have no real options. I currently live alone and bought my new house which I should be excited for in late December last year. But I haven't had 1 day of actually happiness in 6 months due to health complications which keep seeming to go on and on with no answers. I had major surgery called SOD. Since a week after recovering I developed massive stomach cramps which have continued since then. I've only had 1 week of relief from this. I've had multiple "diagnosis" such as fecal impaction, reaction to a 5 year drug, IBS and Pelvic Floor Dysfunction. However nothing has been worked and It's getting to much. Im struggling to work or enjoy life, even living on my own im noticing "I've just had enough". (I've been wearing the same cloths for over a week). I have one last hope this week with a blood test for SIBO. But if that all comes back clean. This is just too much. This cramp and me constantly feeling fatigued is to much. I honestly don't think I Should be driving I'm that fatigued sometimes. What options do I honestly have anymore?

Ally_A So tired
  • replies: 3

I am so tired of fighting to stay alive. All I want is peace and rest. 

I am so tired of fighting to stay alive. All I want is peace and rest. 

Featherless I feel broken
  • replies: 3

I'm really sorry for such a long text but I don't know who to talk to about this at all. I don't have some sort of serious medical issue or diagnosed problems. I'm quite young and on the outside, it would seem like I have a great life. But I have sui... View more

I'm really sorry for such a long text but I don't know who to talk to about this at all. I don't have some sort of serious medical issue or diagnosed problems. I'm quite young and on the outside, it would seem like I have a great life. But I have suicidal and self-harm thoughts. I know I'm too much of a coward to actually do it, but sometimes,. I sometimes just break down and cry, but only quietly and when I'm alone. I'm not under a lot of school pressure, but I always feel a weight on my shoulders. I do dance, and I feel pressured by my mother (whom I asked for help) to be better and try harder. I know I asked her for help first, but I can't take it. My knees are bruised and painful, my shoulder is red, and my heart just can't take it. It sounds shallow. Simple. Petty. But I can't. My work isn't be appreciated. My effort isn't being acknowledged. I'm constantly being told 'you're not even trying that hard' whenever I try to be vulnerable or explain myself. It's right. I'm not trying as hard as I know I could be. But I'm still trying. Spending hours. Until I'm dizzy. Until I hear something crack. And I wake up in pain every day, but keep going. I'm burnt out. It's not just that. Sometimes, I sit in a dark room alone for hours, feeling utterly empty and broken and wanting to end everything for no reason. Every bad thing that happened to me feels like a dream. A nightmare. I don't even have that big of a problem in life. People are out suffering worse. People are dying. And I'm here crying because I'm tired. I need to pull myself together. But I can't. I just want to let myself go and let my mind shatter into a million pieces. I'm so tired. I'm so broken. I want to die but know I won't.

Guest_56045834 Narc partner
  • replies: 2

I have been diagnosed with anxiety, my partner no dobt is an Narc but we are going through with buying a house.After feeling excited about buying a house , having an argument about about him changing and needing him to work more because I pay for eve... View more

I have been diagnosed with anxiety, my partner no dobt is an Narc but we are going through with buying a house.After feeling excited about buying a house , having an argument about about him changing and needing him to work more because I pay for everything explain that he was the boss in front of our kids and we were below him has led to me wanting to self harm and drink

Bigdog72 What do u do when u can't get help
  • replies: 5

Due to PTSD caused by sexual abuse i live constantly with dark thoughts. No a day goes by that i dont think of ending it all. I keep fighting but it gets harder n harder everyday. I have been to my gp and have a mental heath plan but due to living im... View more

Due to PTSD caused by sexual abuse i live constantly with dark thoughts. No a day goes by that i dont think of ending it all. I keep fighting but it gets harder n harder everyday. I have been to my gp and have a mental heath plan but due to living im a regional area and being on a careers pension i cant afford to pay to get help. My dr has sent out alot of referals and cant get me in to see anyone. Presented to hospital a few times which is a 100km drive one way and they just send me home saying u seem ok now. No sure how to get help anymore. Im getting scared that on my own i wont be able to keep fighting. Only thing i think lefyt is to harm myself to get the help. I know this is not something i should be thinking but quickly running out of options. Im sorry to dump this on here i know in the end is my problem to deal with as it has always been. I do appreciate u all.

123gottapose mounting pressure is pushing me to bad actions
  • replies: 1

studying has become overwhelming, moving house is overwhelming, trying to keep up with my relationship is overwhelming, and it's led me to act on self-harmful thoughts. i can't fix anything truly, because i can't afford to, i can't focus on my study,... View more

studying has become overwhelming, moving house is overwhelming, trying to keep up with my relationship is overwhelming, and it's led me to act on self-harmful thoughts. i can't fix anything truly, because i can't afford to, i can't focus on my study, i'm worried that i'll fall apart. it's happened before, i've hurt myself, struggled with my study at the same time, dropped out, and then it's gotten worse. i can't hurt my partners again, but i'm hurting myself as well. i can't drop out, because i've never succeeded at anything either. honestly it's making me want to disappear forever, but i can't do that. and i hate that. why can't i just go away?