Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

This space discusses suicide and self-harm. Consider limiting the time you spend here. To use the section safely, read the pinned discussion.

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Sophie_M Do you have a safety plan?
  • replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts wi... View more

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

Sophie_M PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section
  • replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to h... View more

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. ​This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

All discussions

Tamrby strong urges
  • replies: 44

i have been clean for almost 2 months now, im super proud of myself, but after not really thinking about it for days I will randomly get really strong urges? AAh i know its probably normal but its really not fun, anyone got any tips to deal with urge... View more

i have been clean for almost 2 months now, im super proud of myself, but after not really thinking about it for days I will randomly get really strong urges? AAh i know its probably normal but its really not fun, anyone got any tips to deal with urges?

Eagle Ray Suicidality and perimenopause
  • replies: 143

Has anyone else experienced severe suicidality in relation to perimenopause? Did anything particular help? There is apparently a strong association for some women. I had a major drop in oestrogen a year ago resulting in severe anxiety/depression/suic... View more

Has anyone else experienced severe suicidality in relation to perimenopause? Did anything particular help? There is apparently a strong association for some women. I had a major drop in oestrogen a year ago resulting in severe anxiety/depression/suicidal ideation then. It’s re-occurring now. I have complicating factors of c-ptsd and complicated grief. Saturday was the anniversary of my mother’s sudden and distressing death. I was extremely bad on Friday and early Saturday. I’ve been calling helplines and had some practical help. It helps regulate me for a few hours then I start to disintegrate again. It’s a feeling of totally failing apart. I do have a psych appointment on Thursday and I’ve booked a counselling appointment with the Australian menopause society as well. HRT may help but I have to look at how it will interact with my liver disease which can be a complicating factor. It’s a rare disease and not well understood or even known about by most medical practitioners. I just feel totally overwhelmed.

Atomic_Wolf_Boy I can't face anymore injustice. I'm a tragedy.
  • replies: 26

1) I am 29 with no active payed work history. I've never wanted to be a apprentice, do a traineeship or anything in construction or the trades. I would struggle with Year 12 VCE and I couldn't be suited for University. I never wanted to work the typi... View more

1) I am 29 with no active payed work history. I've never wanted to be a apprentice, do a traineeship or anything in construction or the trades. I would struggle with Year 12 VCE and I couldn't be suited for University. I never wanted to work the typical industries like hospitality, sales, factory and retail. I've never known anything beyond the limited scope of conventional work and nothing of that seems suitable and desirable for me. 2) I never had a close relationship with my father. I've hated him ever since I was little, It started with him trying to make me follow his AFL football team, or he would be overbearing and verbal to my mother. He only understands himself, His selfish, arrogant, un caring, ignorant about many things. He can be devious and talk behind your back if he wants to, because if things are kept secret he won't have a guilty conscious. He prevents me from having valid feelings and problems and sais I'm on holidays because I'm un employed. He wants a house of peace and doesn't let me talk to my mother if his bothered about the volume of his T.V. His told my mother that I shouldn't be driving and that I don't want to work. All during high school my father was complaining to him about school feels and that I was taking days off and his friend was saying to pull me out of the only ideal private high school I could go to. I was bullied all during high school verbally and even physically degraded. I hated everyone in that school everyday for six years. Generally any issue that isn't his own problem, He just said why are you telling me for, or what does it have to do with me.

Guest_39137288 I don't really see a point in living at all. Existential/nihilistic crisis, I guess?
  • replies: 1

I don't see any meaning in life and don't really want to live anymore. I've been questioning why I do anything at all since I was a young teenager. At some point, I think I came to the conclusion: "I should live to make myself happy and/or make other... View more

I don't see any meaning in life and don't really want to live anymore. I've been questioning why I do anything at all since I was a young teenager. At some point, I think I came to the conclusion: "I should live to make myself happy and/or make other people happy" And that must have worked for a while... But now, I'm questioning: "Why does happiness matter?" After all, suspending any beliefs beyond the physical world, when one abstracts happiness to its basic components; is it not just "The right neurons releasing the right neurotransmitters at the right time"? Why do I even exist in the first place? Being an atheist, I believe I came from a line of species that was most fit to survive in their environment at the time. I believe that line of species originates from some kind of primordial soup. In that primordial would have been a simpler form of life, such as bacteria: Cells without a brain, without will, "alive" because the metabolic reactions taking place in and around them sustain themselves. That's all I think they were, self-sustaining metabolic reactions. The result of the laws of chemistry just simply existing. This is what I believe I am. This makes me think there is no point in life and I'm just the result of natural selection after the laws of chemistry/physics. But, I'm not just some unembodied consciousness drifting in a void, I'm a human in a body, a brain: I have emotions. I still feel sadness and inevitably will, but I don't see a point in suffering through it. So, why not just die? I mean, there's totally more questions to be asked though, like: How/Why does this universe even exist in the first place? How/Why are physics and chemistry like that? If happiness can be abstracted to a bunch of chemicals (i.e. neurotransmitters) at the right place/time, what can the particles that make the atoms that make those chemicals be abstracted to? (I have no clue) Is there any meaning in the answers to these questions? On a more personal note: I began socially withdrawing 2 years ago, I started SHing about 4 months ago and I feel like I might allow myself to die if I can't see a reason to live or at the very least, feel motivated enough to live. I have people in my life who miss me and be affected by my death, so I'd like to avoid going through with that... But I guess, if I look at what I've been typing, It wouldn't really matter... If you guys have anything to say; philosophical, anecdotal or otherwise: Please do, I would love to hear it. thx 4 reading my super long post.

Guest_45363671 Why do I feel like this
  • replies: 2

I don’t get it why do I feel this way, I just want to feel loved and appreciated again, I have no one but myself it feels like. My parents don’t care they rather let me do it then help me, I don’t want to put my love through this bc it’ll hurt him as... View more

I don’t get it why do I feel this way, I just want to feel loved and appreciated again, I have no one but myself it feels like. My parents don’t care they rather let me do it then help me, I don’t want to put my love through this bc it’ll hurt him as much as it hurts me and I can’t see him do that to himself, I just hate life I hate how much control my family have over me

Alel Can masterbation be a type of self harm?
  • replies: 2

Ive been struggling with masterbation since I was really young. When i get the urge, I start feeling dizzy and shaky. My heart beats fast and I feel nauseous. After I feel disgusted and angry with myself. I noticed that, most of the time, I masterbat... View more

Ive been struggling with masterbation since I was really young. When i get the urge, I start feeling dizzy and shaky. My heart beats fast and I feel nauseous. After I feel disgusted and angry with myself. I noticed that, most of the time, I masterbate when I am not doing mentally well that day. But there are times where it just comes randomly or triggered from somthing I've seen/heard. I was sa by my cousins when I was younger, but I don't know if this is the cause of it, due to not having any memories of that time.

nadine trapped
  • replies: 8

feeling trapped. feel like my family would be better off with out me. I make so many mistakes. My husband says he hates me and that the children would be better off without me. I really cant blame him. I want to run, but i would miss my beautiful chi... View more

feeling trapped. feel like my family would be better off with out me. I make so many mistakes. My husband says he hates me and that the children would be better off without me. I really cant blame him. I want to run, but i would miss my beautiful children too much. if i die, i wouldnt miss them and they would not be involved in a horrible divorce. I destroy everything i do or touch. i hate it, i hate myself so much. but when you talk to me in person i am extremely defensive and come across as aggressive. I am ADHD/ASD and BPD. the world simply hurts too much, but i dont want to hurt my beautiful children. I love them more than anything, but sometimes im not a good mum as they see me cry alot and that is trauma to them. i want them to be happy. their dad is a brilliant father!!! they dont need me. i make too many misakes

Guest_13761429 shit
  • replies: 2

i know that i have a lot to live for but i really want to end my life right now, idk im just trying to distract myself from the thoughts

i know that i have a lot to live for but i really want to end my life right now, idk im just trying to distract myself from the thoughts

Trans22 Is recovery from long-term severe depression possible?
  • replies: 6

I've loving my life since accepting that I was born with a female mind (& male body), however I am struggling to overcome 40 years of depressions with almost daily thoughts/dreams for my life to end. As part of my attempt to heal, I reached out to a ... View more

I've loving my life since accepting that I was born with a female mind (& male body), however I am struggling to overcome 40 years of depressions with almost daily thoughts/dreams for my life to end. As part of my attempt to heal, I reached out to a woman that I went thought high school with (only person from school that I have ever reached out or responded to). I then spent the next hour in tears and wondering whether my mind has been damaged beyond repair.PS. I have a proven method of recovering from such situations - rereading my transition journal has always brought be back into the present.