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Grief and loss

Support and advice following the loss of a family member, partner, spouse or someone close to you.

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Sophie_M Welcome to the Grief and Loss section
  • replies: 27

Everyone’s experience of grief or loss is unique. You might experience all kinds of difficult or overwhelming emotions, and you might sometimes wonder if the sadness will ever end. This is a normal reaction to loss. There is no right or wrong way to ... View more

Everyone’s experience of grief or loss is unique. You might experience all kinds of difficult or overwhelming emotions, and you might sometimes wonder if the sadness will ever end. This is a normal reaction to loss. There is no right or wrong way to grieve, but it can help to allow yourself to: share your grief, and let others support you. This forum category is for all discussions relating to how grief and loss has affected you, providing a space for you to express your feelings, discuss difficult moments and anniversaries, and honour the memories of your lost loved ones. Please be aware that threads in this forum may contain discussions of self-harm and suicide.

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Michelle_19 Grief of both parents along with mental health
  • replies: 2

Hi my name is Michelle I lost my mother 4 months ago and Thursday last week. I find him dead and finding it hard to deal with and that not been diagnosised with any mental health conditions. I am asking for help

Hi my name is Michelle I lost my mother 4 months ago and Thursday last week. I find him dead and finding it hard to deal with and that not been diagnosised with any mental health conditions. I am asking for help

Lynda Early grieving
  • replies: 2

Hi ..my name is lynda and my aunty passed away 2 weeks ago but only found out a day ago,my emotions are through the roof,i lost my brother to suicide and i am scared of the future.

Hi ..my name is lynda and my aunty passed away 2 weeks ago but only found out a day ago,my emotions are through the roof,i lost my brother to suicide and i am scared of the future.

OllieA_TransKid I believe i dont have a reason to be here
  • replies: 3

So, around 4 years ago, my great grandmother died, and i'm not over it. It's almost her passing anniversary soon and along with my ex girlfriend breaking up with me and calling me a bad person... I want to join my grandmother in heaven... I can't dea... View more

So, around 4 years ago, my great grandmother died, and i'm not over it. It's almost her passing anniversary soon and along with my ex girlfriend breaking up with me and calling me a bad person... I want to join my grandmother in heaven... I can't deal with my ex's bull crap and i feel like I'm drowning in quicksand of toxicity...

JamesCarer Mum is gone and I'm broken
  • replies: 9

That's it. I cared for her for 15 years. I knew she was thirsty before she needed a drink. I knew when she was in pain. I could understand her eyes. I never wanted her to feel like she was a burden. I wanted to provide what she needed before she even... View more

That's it. I cared for her for 15 years. I knew she was thirsty before she needed a drink. I knew when she was in pain. I could understand her eyes. I never wanted her to feel like she was a burden. I wanted to provide what she needed before she even knew she needed it She was the most gentle, loving, caring and compassionate person I knew and I will ever know. She loved her kids above all else and she deserved to be cared for. I would do it all again in a heartbeat She didn't speak English well and she would hear me practising the piano often. When she was under palliative care. I made sure she was at home with me. It took some time to find the right doses of medication to keep her calm but her delirium had set in far earlier. I had the Greek TV playing in the background and played her recordings of my piano playing. As her breathing slowed and I felt her pulse, I thought my pulse had sstopped too and wished she'd taken me with her. "Where are you going without me!" I cried. I held her hand and sat beside her for three hours talking to her and thanking her for being the perfect mum as family arrived. My younger brother was already there. I remember waking to my brother holding me down after having a semi-seizure. Psychogenic Epilepsy they called it. With neds I started thinking about my future and work. I was a secondary school teacher before caring and I knew the vultures were coming, and they did. From my own family. Now, I don't want to move. I'm forced to sell my house (vultures), I'm scared, lonely as I was cut off for 15 whole years, and there's this pain in my stomach that won't go away. Sometimes it feels hollow too. I'm 44 and I feel like the bigger part of me has died. It's too intense sometimes. Sometimes it's softer but when nighttime comes, my soul starts to ask for my mum. My beautiful mum. I promised to lead a happy life before Ivrealised how hard it would be. I know it's onky been 3 weeks but It seems impossible. I miss you so, so much.

Neildowne Lost..
  • replies: 3

Hi allwell.....last November my partner asked me to leave our home of 16 yearsmy dogs..my garden..my home gonei moved in with friends for 6 weeks,,,they stole from me....abused me...emotionallynow im with my niece and husband for a while im missing m... View more

Hi allwell.....last November my partner asked me to leave our home of 16 yearsmy dogs..my garden..my home gonei moved in with friends for 6 weeks,,,they stole from me....abused me...emotionallynow im with my niece and husband for a while im missing my life i had.....i just cant seem to move oni did my back in 7 weeks ago.....slowly getting betterthankyou all xits a long story......ive lost my forever home...Neil

Guest_34179805 My only child committed suicide on 12 November 2024
  • replies: 6

I am so lost I do not know what to do, our only child Ash committed suicide on November 12th 2024. We knew he suffered with his mental health for many years but his wife was always able to bring him back from the darkness. He had so many things go wr... View more

I am so lost I do not know what to do, our only child Ash committed suicide on November 12th 2024. We knew he suffered with his mental health for many years but his wife was always able to bring him back from the darkness. He had so many things go wrong for both of them over the last 3 years, from losing a baby and being told they could never carry another one, losing their beloved dog of 14 years, serious accidents landing both in hospital at different times, financial worries. Both my husband & I tried our best to help but for the last 18 months he started to distance himself from us and his friends we kept trying to make contact asking if we could pop in and see them, we felt not loved at the time, I wish they would have both reached out to us for help, but Ash & his wife were very private people and kept it all to themselves. Its only after his death that his wife told us he had started hearing voices in his head and had stopped taking his medication (we always told him we would pay for his medicataion if he was short of money) he had a good job and loved his work mates who all told us at the funeral that he never said nor displayed any issues, he kept it well hidden. I miss my boy so much it hurts to carry on every day. I have taken time off of work until the end of Jan 2025. My husband has gone back to work he said he feels better for it. I dont have any family here in Australia, although my sister came out from the UK for the funeral she has now gone home. This is my first day on my own since it happened, im so lost and lonely. Is there another mum on this site that has gone through the same with an only child that I can talk with?

Jasper I almost lost my dad
  • replies: 3

My dad had heart surgery a few days ago, and while I’ve been aware of the fact that it could’ve easily been so much worse to the point where he might’ve died, it only just hit me tonight. And I’m not okay. It’s especially heard because my dad and I d... View more

My dad had heart surgery a few days ago, and while I’ve been aware of the fact that it could’ve easily been so much worse to the point where he might’ve died, it only just hit me tonight. And I’m not okay. It’s especially heard because my dad and I don’t have the greatest relationship, and we were going through a particularly difficult time leading up to all of this. I just feel so guilty. If he put off getting his chest pain checked out even just a couple days longer, he would’ve died, and the last thing we would’ve done was have a fight. I hate this. I might not have a great relationship with him but the thought of him dying is so scary and it was so close to happening

string_cheese Grief about dreams never realised
  • replies: 5

Hi, My work, relationships, living situation, hobbies, beliefs, family and values have all changed over the last few years. Some of the change is objectively really awesome, and some was sort of out of my control. Either way, I'm feelings my feelings... View more

Hi, My work, relationships, living situation, hobbies, beliefs, family and values have all changed over the last few years. Some of the change is objectively really awesome, and some was sort of out of my control. Either way, I'm feelings my feelings and problem solving my way through the change. Growing etc. I'm so much happier. But I've got all this grief. I think about all the possibilities, the things I never did in the hobbies I gave up, and the things I didn't say to the people I'm not speaking to anymore.My psychologist recently labelled this as grief and I had to agree, sometimes I feel like I've got this heavy loss and heavy thoughts that builds up inside. I have only ever associated grief with death. Has anyone had experience with grief that doesn't really relate to death?

Guest_49458722 Miscarriages
  • replies: 3

Hi All, I’m struggling with depression after having 4 miscarriages. I’d like to get support how to find happiness in life again.

Hi All, I’m struggling with depression after having 4 miscarriages. I’d like to get support how to find happiness in life again.

OhmeOhmy I miss my Mum and Dad
  • replies: 2

Both my parents have passed away and yesterday was the two year anniversary of my Dad passing. The grief still hits me so hard and raw at times. It rips through my whole body.I miss their unconditional love, I miss being known and understood so well,... View more

Both my parents have passed away and yesterday was the two year anniversary of my Dad passing. The grief still hits me so hard and raw at times. It rips through my whole body.I miss their unconditional love, I miss being known and understood so well, I miss having someone completely in my corner, I miss their faces lighting up when I walked in to visit them, I miss their compassion, I miss their loving investment in my life and wellbeing, I miss how safe they made me feel, I miss their voice, smiles and hugs. I'm so grateful to have had parents that gave me all these things to miss.