- Beyond Blue Forums
- Caring for myself and others
- Long-term support over the journey
- Re: Alone..Depressed..Sad..
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Mark Topic as New
- Mark Topic as Read
- Pin this Topic for Current User
- Follow
- Printer Friendly Page
Alone..Depressed..Sad..
- Mark as New
- Follow Post
- Mute
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Permalink
- Report Post
- Mark as New
- Follow Post
- Mute
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Permalink
- Report Post
Hello Dear Paws, Moonstruck, Deebi👩❤️💋👩 and everyone…
Thank you so much for your posts…I did reply yesterday to wish everyone reading here a Merry Christmas…with my internet going off and on all the time it didn’t get delivered…this internet problem has been ongoing now for around 12 months and it’s so frustration…..
My son turned up alone, daughter in law and grandson changed there mind at the last minute…which was and is very disappointing for me…but I suppose Karma got me because of my anxiety of feeling like not looking forward to seeing them…which now they didn’t come I am sad….but I am grateful my son came down and we are doing a few repairs to my home…..well he is……, I’m just a spectator, wish so much I that I could be physically healthy to help him….doesn’t matter how old our children get, we still don’t like to see them do physically hard work…He is going back home tomorrow afternoon.🥲…
I do hope everyone is doing both mentally and physically well….
Lots of love, hugs and care to everyone…🩷🤗🌈🌹.
👩❤️💋👩Grandy..
- Mark as New
- Follow Post
- Mute
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Permalink
- Report Post
Hey sweet Grandy 💏 and everyone ✋
Darling lady I was feeling a bit ugh because I'd posted to you a a couple of days I think before Xmas and realized I'd forgotten to wish you and all a Merry Xmas. Yikes 😮 just checked back and realised I hadn't even sent it. Roight. On the positive side maybe I can improve on it. Deendy and I worked on some of it together.
Geez darlin I hope you didn't wonder where I was or worry. It's tucked away in notes so soon I"ll touch it up which was why I originally put it there and post it.
Although I"m sorry you felt sad not seeing the rest of the family hun esp when you were planning on them coming I do love you've had quality time with your dear son.
Sounds great getting some home jobs done. I know how you feel with the physical side of things, I do on occasion ask. Its's another part of our lives coming to terms with not being able to do things isn't it. Another part of our independence that we lose along the way esp if we're as I know you too for sure are the people that like to pull our weight.
On the other side as you'd no doubt often have experienced, it's satisfying and a good thing helping others. I would imagine your dear son would have felt that esp for you dear lady 🤗 It's easy to do things for someone that's so lovely and grateful.
So here's a belated Merry Xmas to all the dear people here including you bbff 💜 I do hope your Xmas was a nice one and feel for and understand for those who have sadness esp at this time.
I love the good cheer and pretties about Xmas. SO many people may not say Happy Xmas etc and New year to someone else. It's really nice people connecting even in small ways.
Grandy and other lovely people we've met along our meaningful journey including lovely BB staff thank you always for being you and for the amazing support that speaks volumes.
Love always Grandy 💗💚🐉 - Deendy and I'll BE BACK soon. Really am sorry lovey. Nearly got it posted struth how the memory goes with 🙃 and tiredness. Ha will always love our emoji fun. Our Croixy comes to mind not being a fan but I know it's hard with eyesight dear man is why I try at least at times to explain what it is.
Pawsy it might be in the new yr darl that I pop in for a cuppa to yours and Croixy man, know you're both in my heart as well 💗
Peace 🕊 wished for all 🤗🌞🐣
- Mark as New
- Follow Post
- Mute
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Permalink
- Report Post
Heya lovely wishing you and family a great new year for everyone too
I dearly hope you're feeling a lot if not at least a little lighter than you have been hun. Poor soul
Always heart thoughts and concern Grandy 🤗
Our lovely Dendy came this morning very early... joy... to pick up your gift
Knowing how fast she travels ...vroooom...putt putt cough..uh oh she had to use the 3 wheeler bike 🚜 cause the go go mobeal packed a sad but her mighty wings remain in tact.
This land trip is to a far farrr away secret place deep in the Amazon forest that's bursting with Tulips amidst moss covered branches lays soo peacefully Grandfathers beard displaying just enough Silver glitter throughout hanging off tree branches without trunks.
The Snapdragons (Deendys family) in certain lights can be seen opening their mouths revealing tranquil...glitter holograms (Glittergrams being the technical term 🎓) A pop up menu allows you to pick your colours.
I love the deep Red/Crimson & the Violet ones look spectacular with the deep yolk Yellow around the lacey floppy edges which took me a little longer to sew on. 3 seconds of my life not wasted though thankfully.
Grandy you'll love them cause a mighty gigantisaurus 🌈 appears around the flowers creating a feeling of peace & belonging.
How lucky we are to have colour in our lives. It'd be pretty bland if everything was just one or none at all.
Deendy was sure to include your fave coloured ones that I grew 1.38 minutes ago.
The glittergrams are all in one single perfect flower. Half has shades of Purple while different Greens spiralling up and out on the other side. Bang In the centre sits a sparkly Golden 3D 💛 just like yours.
To help you sleep & enjoy beautiful dreams be sure lovey to find & feel the serenity from the White dove 🕊 resting peacefully in the middle. It glows in the dark emitting peace love & happiness for the rest of your life dear friend.
Endless love and appreciation knowing you darlin 💏
- Mark as New
- Follow Post
- Mute
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Permalink
- Report Post
Hello Dear Deebi👩❤️💋👩 and everyone…..🤗..
Thank you Deebi, I’m feeling mentally better then I have been for a few months and physically as well…not working for the past few months seems to easing off the aches and pains of old age…
I loved reading about our beautiful Deendy 🐉…we have had some great adventures with her, haven’t we….I think the Amazon is a first time destination…my type of place, trees, rivers, birds little creatures scurrying around the forest everywhere…
After reading your post, I went back into my fantasy world…( I forget the name my psychiatrist called it)…I imagined myself sitting with you one Deendy back, no helmets or seat belts…. peacefully flying through the air with our hair blowing with the gentle breeze caused my Deendy’s wings….I forgot how much I miss my fantasy world….anything is possible with an imagination that I can physically feel….
Glittergrams, now they sound beautiful, I like glitter very much especially with shades of purple, Snap Dragons, I remember playing with them as a child..if you gently squeezed them in the right spot…it looked like they opened their mouth….I haven’t seen them for years and years….not much grows out here..it’s to hot and dry….Im not one for wasting water watering
- Mark as New
- Follow Post
- Mute
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Permalink
- Report Post
Oh no….silly me I accidentally pressed post 😂😂😂…feel a bit useless doing that…..
anyway water can get very scarce during drought times…which we get very often..
Oh I lost my line of thinking now…fantasy zapped away by that post button….
Hope everyone is doing well and enjoying their days the best you can…
Sending my love, hugs and care to everyone…🩷🤗🌹🌈..
Grandy…
- Mark as New
- Follow Post
- Mute
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Permalink
- Report Post
Heya precious friend 💏 and other dear people 😊
Grandy it's SO good hearing you're feeling better than you have been in a long time. Thankfully we eventually seem to come out of the downs. Not much chop at all.
Yes we haven't done fantasy for a while so well it was Deendy that whispered in my ear to do some. Good fun aye. We sure have had many incredible fantasy trips. Love em.
Glad it's got your imagination flowing again too. Really is quite neat delving into anything goes.
I reckon we never really see January, it's no time and we're into Feb. Struth half way through Jan already.
Time not stopping fascinates me.
Think we're time travellers and here to learn.
Dear Mr Darling 😍 and I have increased our walks lately, woah it's not so hard when there's some energy to be found. We'll be having rain soon so might soon go for another.
Ok lovely one, just flew in for a quicky cuppa...tia Maria and milk goes down a treat, thanks for that. I'll leave the Kahlua for our next visit.
Stay happy and well what a treat having your body healing too. You wouldn't know yourself hun. It's a huge relief being free or having less pain isn't it.
Love you dear Grandy and that you just keep pushing on. Go girl you're an inspiration.
😎🤗✊👀💗💜
Thoughts everyone 🗯
- Mark as New
- Follow Post
- Mute
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Permalink
- Report Post
Hello Dear Deebi👩❤️💋👩,…and everyone…..🤗,
Thank you for your posts…
I have been in hospital for 2 days….got home this morning….Monday at work I did something that really hurt my back…I was in the shop alone because no one else turned up…Thank goodness Welfare turned up and helped me up and called an ambulance to take me to hospital…They kept me in hospital until I could at least get up from bed and walk around a bit….Nothing serious has happened to my back, osteoarthritis mixed with moving the wrong way caused me to tear a tendon in my back, which made it painful to walk, bend over and even sit down was impossible, the pain was incredible, still very painful but I can walk around slowly now and do things….getting out of bed or off a chair is still very hard but I’ve been told by Drs. that each day I’ll feel a little less pain and be able to do a bit more…and I am not to go back to work for a month…This afternoon I rang up the shop and told them I will not be working there anymore…I feel teary and emotional….it has been a part of my life now for many years..
Now since this happened…and management has been notified…I’ve been told that management is looking into putting a Shute from outside to inside the shop into a huge crate so the donations don’t need to be manually loaded into trolleys and wheeled along the footpath and up the shops ramp any more…..
My best real life friend, knowing what happened to me hasn’t even asked me if I needed help since I got back home….she rang me to say she has painted her front fence and now has a sore back…..she only painted her fence because she knew I was going to paint the new timber railings my son fixed at Christmas for me on my back veranda…..I feel so hurt by her….My neighbour Mrs nsc as soon as she found out she bought me some basic shopping needs, came over and made me a cup of coffee and stayed with me for an hour….she made me cry with her kindness….yeah I’m really emotional 🥲…(don’t like that about me)….
Seems that I can’t get a break, either mentally or physically these days…I’m really over the constant pain my body is giving me and the way it’s making me an emotional mess…I need a break from life…life is hard right now…
Hope you all are doing better then okay…hugs live and care everyone…🤗🩷🦋🌈.
👩❤️💋👩Grandy..
- Mark as New
- Follow Post
- Mute
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Permalink
- Report Post
Hello Dear Grandy and Everyone,
I’m so sorry to hear you had the back injury. It does seem like a sign that it was time to finish at the shop, but I do understand the feeling of loss of something that has been a part of your life for so long.
Please don’t be hard on yourself for feeling emotional about it, or for feeling emotional about the kind neighbour either. I’m so glad she gave you support, getting you some shopping items, making you a coffee and staying with you for an hour. I’m sorry to hear about the friend who hasn’t been supportive. I think it’s in these kinds of situations we learn who our most genuine friends are, and it does sound like your neighbour is a more genuine friend and support to you.
Your unsupportive friend reminds me of a certain type of friend I used to have in the past. It seems she is sort of emulating/competing with whatever you do - painting the fence because yours was painted and now has a sore back like you. It’s a bit like they don’t have their own centre and identity and sort of feed off the friendship in a way that’s not necessarily seeing and supporting you. I used to attract these sorts of people because I was patient and kind and they wanted someone to latch onto. And you are so kind Grandy I can imagine such a person may attach to you. I hope you can focus on the lovely people who can really see you, value you and be there for you, because you really deserve that kindness Grandy.
There may be some services that can help you at home if you need it. Something like Silver Chain may be able to help with household tasks if your back isn’t up to it. Would something like Meals on Wheels be a help for a little while so you don’t have to think about cooking? I had a ligament injury to my right forearm in 2019 and I know resting it was what improved it.
Perhaps there are some nice movies to watch as a distraction, maybe some DVDs you could borrow from the library? I’m sure, if we could, we’d all love to come and have a cuppa with you and give you support.
Sending you gentle hugs Grandy 🤗
- Mark as New
- Follow Post
- Mute
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Permalink
- Report Post
Hello Grandy,
Oh lass you are in the wars aren't you. How awful being in the shop alone when you hurt yourself, I'm so relieved to hear that the welfare lady came by & found you.
I think feeling emotional about everything shows you care. The shop has been a big part of your life & not going back will be a big change for you. Try to focus on how much better you felt physically when you last took a break from the shop. Once your strain mends then hopefully you will find that again. I know you now have a person come & help you with the mowing. I think Eagle Ray may be right & you would find it helpful to get some help for inside as well. Especially as you are still waiting for your shoulder surgery.
It is sad that Betty hasn't been there for you, I'm wondering if with her advanced years she may be getting a bit dotty & not fully understanding things. The two of you have been such close friends over the years I would hate to think she meant to be so thoughtless & unsupportive.
How lovely that Mrs nsc was so wonderfully kind. You should be so pleased that over time you were able to get her to trust you & help her break down the thorny side of her nature that she had built up to feel safe around people. You did her a great kindness with your persisting in being kind to her. How much it meant to her is evident by her kindness back to you.
Be gentle with yourself lass.
Biggest 🐻 hug
Paws
- Mark as New
- Follow Post
- Mute
- Subscribe to RSS Feed
- Permalink
- Report Post
Hello Dear Paws, Eagle Ray and everyone….🤗🩷..
Thank you so much for your beautiful support, yes I can get aged care agents “Live Better” to help with my housework but the thought of someone coming into my house to do something that I will be able to do myself in a week or so, gives me both anxiety and shame…eventually I will clean and tidy my house…if I don’t drown in all the dust and the grass my fur girls bring inside 😁..
I have been talking to Betty since Christmas about painting those boards of wood…now that I can’t do it right now because of pain, she decided to do her fence and tell me about it…I have noticed over the years that she has to do whatever other people do…buy what other people buy…Don’t get me wrong, I do love her but have been feeling emotional unstable since hurting my back…and feeling a bit helpless within myself…plus Betty is upset with me that I quit work…I went back for her….the last time I quit..but not this time…I told her gently that she should continue working like she always has and she doesn’t have to do what I do….
Paws, I was offered to have my shoulders operated on last June/July, but another cortisone shot into both shoulder joints has helped with the pain and most importantly my movement, I have around 95% of movement back now without pain, so I opted out of the surgery…(which wasn’t guaranteed to fix the problem long term)…
Today, the real deep inner pain is better…although getting up hurts like hell…I can get up from sitting down without screaming in pain….using my walker to get around safely in my house is a bit hard but I think gentle walking will help it heal quicker….?…I have all my life been very fit…until the past 5 years..and it’s so hard to accept that with my older age I have to limit myself on doing things….my mind says I can do it….but my body doesn’t agree with my mind 😢…
Eagle Ray, I have had a few of those frozen meals from the supermarkets….most of them are ewe..I had them for a few nights……Cheese and tomato toasties are easy to make so I’ll try that tonight…just milk and cereal for the past few days has been my go to…Can’t wait until I’m able to move around freely again….really want to try to make Sweet and Sour Pork…I bought all the ingredients a few days before my back decided to attack Me…
Enjoy your day everyone the best you can….Love, hugs and care to you all..🩷🤗🌹🌈..
👩❤️💋👩Grandy..
