Not in a good space

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

It's like a feeling just bubbling up to the surface. It's panicky and disgusting and I dont' know what to do with it. There's no thoughts associated with it. It's a feeling. A really gross one. I called the Suicide Call Back service. I didn't find them helpful. What do you do? What helps you?

[Paw Prints]

Hello Katy,

Whoops.. say sorry to kitty for me for calling him she... my bad... I'm glad he has his appetite back.

After having so many months without restrictions.. making your own masks might be the way to go... I wonder if the chemists etc would have enough in stock for everyone all at once.

Woofa did a very short canter back & forth the length of the verandah earlier & managed to sit for his meals... so a definite improvement today... I hope it continues... his final needle is this Friday.

Hugs

Paws

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy,

Nasty fires outside the big city in your state....

Did you manage to find some masks? They're everywhere here now. Or did you make one?

I hope the headache has stayed away and you're feeling a bit better. hugs.

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Good morning

I've put a hold on some masks that are supposed to be becoming available this morning from a store in town. I'll feel more comfortable with properly made ones, if I need to go the shop. Yes, it seems we were all a bit unprepared over here in the west, having had such a good run thus far.

The fires on the outskirts of big city are awful. They look to have lost a few properties already, and my son said it was in the high 30's yesterday. There's talk of a cyclone sliding its way down the coast later this week, but hopefully they have things under control before then.

Happy to hear that you're finding the treatment helpful, Paws. I'm on the hunt for doggy sunscreen. The one I've been using for years is no longer being made, and I can't take Storm out without any. Oh, and kitty says he forgives you because he doesn't know what he or she means anyway 😉

Well, the only bummer about lockdown so far, is my book came in at the library, but I can't pick it up. Will have to read one of the 30 I have here, I guess 🙂

Hugs, Hugs x

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy,

I'm here rather late after harp.. did you get the face masks? I use the disposable surgical ones, and it helps to put the strings at the sides in a figure of eight around your ears as they're less tight that way and you don't feel as much as if you can't breathe.

A shame about your library book! I've had a book on reserve for months now, and it was due back on 18 January and whoever has borrowed it has kept it overdue and I'm still waiting for it to be returned, rats! It had to be the book I really wanted!

I hope you're feeling a bit better... I am tired after Sam being sick and losing my phone yesterday and now harp today and Sam still poorly...but I hope you are managing OK there.. yes WA has had a good run so far, I guess this virus can get out anywhere... none of us can be sure we won't have another lock down at some point... I even bought extra loo paper yesterday just in case we had a sudden lock down here - nothing like being prepared!!! hugs.

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Well I've finally accepted the Honours offer and enrolled. I've been putting it off because Honours AND placement seem HUGE and SCARY! As soon as I just wrote that I was reminded that my psychologist would suggest not using those words, as words are powerful lol. Sometimes in my peaceful moments, I'll think it's all going to be ok. But then my anxiety kicks in and I'm back to panicking. It's not the workload. It's the human interaction. There's going to be a lot of it. I decided to let the Honours co-ordinator know that I have anxiety, but I'll do my best to meet expectations. I've asked her to let me know if she wants to discuss it further (ironic, right? asking if she'd like to have a verbal discussion about me being uncomfortable with verbal discussions. Ha!).

Well, that was step 1 - enrolling. Even that was hard, and I've done it. So, go me! I deserve a lollipop. But seeing as we're on lockdown and I'd rather not go to the shop, I'll use the remainder of my allowed hour of daily exercise to go for a quick rollerskate instead 🙂

Hope anyone reading along is having some wins (even little teeny ones!). Hugs, Katy

[Paw Prints]

Hello Katy,

Yay You!!! That deserves more than a lollipop.... especially telling the co-ordinator about your anxiety...

I hope you enjoyed your rollerskating...

Huggliest of hugs

Paws

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Thanks so much, Paws VC 🙂

Will be thinking of you tomorrow. Big supportive hug xo

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy,

Well that sounds good. Do you think a chat with the Honours co-ordinator might be a good idea anyway, as it might help you to feel less anxious if the academic staff understand your anxiety issue and try to help you with it re the prac components of the year? I think it might be a good idea to ask to have a talk with them about it? I know that makes you anxious anyway, but I think it would be worthwhile. Just my thoughts anyway.

Is there a niche area in social work you could work in at the end of this that wouldn't require so much face to face dealings with people?

Anyway, you're enrolled so all set to go, that's great, I'd have a chat with the staff about things before it all gets rolling, just to help put yourself at ease.

I am off to do some lap swimming at the aquatic centre here and have music lesson this arvo. My computer is acting up again and keeps freezing so sorry for the late reply! Hugs.

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hi Hanna

I'm nervously awaiting a response from the uni, so will see what they say. I'm not sure if they're at work at the moment, they may be having the week off, given the Covid situation. I'm not really looking beyond finishing my degree at this stage. I haven't worked for over a decade, and I have other challenges that I don't talk about here, where that's concerned. I just want to gain my qualification at this stage, so it's not a waste of the last few years.

Well, another day with no new Covid cases here. Interesting. Considering the person that got it, got the highly transmissable strain and was active in the community before testing positive, it seems strange that no new cases have been discovered. Things may go back to normal this weekend.

Swimming and music sounds like a great day. I feel a bit lonely today. Ho hum.

Katy

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy,

I'm on here rather late, I'm sorry you've been feeling a bit low, I hope that improves for you! I went lap swimming this morning which was so nice - being back in the water was great! - and to music this afternoon, then took little Sam for a walk.. so a busy day!

I understand just wanting to do your Honours, looking that far is enough at the moment. It's something to look forward to, getting that! I think have a chat with the staff at the Uni... maybe they can be helpful about your prac placements? I think they would do their best to try to help you as much as they can, you're a high passing student and they don't want to lose you. I hope they get back to you. You might want to go on to more study at the end of your Hons - who knows. Lots of options which is always good!

I listen to Dr Norman Swan's coronacast on the ABC - he was talking about why it hasn't spread.. I think he was talking about the case in WA the other night, he said the man hadn't been to any enclosed places for a prolonged period of time - only a supermarket and a couple of other places.. not into a club or restaurant or anything like that - so he thinks it's just incredibly lucky - he said the virus needs enclosed spaces and a lack of ventilation and a group of people to spread and this man hasn't spent time in those places much. Phew! You can listen to it online.. I Google it.

Well I am off to have some dinner and relax, I'm not used to days being so busy it's been great!

Really wishing you good luck with the Uni people, do let us know how it goes and if/when they get back to you...

Sending lots of fluffy hugs from little Sam oxoxoxo