Not in a good space

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

It's like a feeling just bubbling up to the surface. It's panicky and disgusting and I dont' know what to do with it. There's no thoughts associated with it. It's a feeling. A really gross one. I called the Suicide Call Back service. I didn't find them helpful. What do you do? What helps you?

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hello

I agree, bleak weather is unhelpful for lifting spirits. I'm feeling very glum here today, so just a brief check in. I have my period and can't afford any supplies, so that's fun. I'm going to have to get better at asking for help. I'm glad your computer is working again. I hope you email your brother and ask for help with Sam. It's definitely a worry when our pets aren't well. Hugs to you both x

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy,

I hope you feel a bit better today. I wrote a reply but gremlins ate it. The chemists here all give out supplies for periods free to women in need - they all have a sign up saying just to ask and they will give you what you need - it's great that they do that. Keep warm and fluffy hugs from little Sam oxoxoxo

[Guest_1643]

Hi Katy

hope that doesn't get u down 😞 it is not nice to have a need we can't meet and i reltae to it being hard and upestting juts the concept. There are places that give coles vouchers out I think like st vinnies and others which I've used before for things I'd like to afford but can't like cleaning supplies or even the newspaper every so often. Mine are running out now as well, they gave me a few.

Sending warmth and hope u get to do something fun today!

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hi Hanna, Sleepy, anyone else popping by...

It's been the most gorgeous day but I've not managed to get out at all. I've just sat in bed and I'm still here. I did my own tarot reading, just a general one, and it says I'm overwhelmed and feel ready to break - so, not really telling me anything I don't know. Wish I at least had some company or support while everything feels challenging, so I'm glad I have you guys here.

For anything to get better, I need to work on me, so I'm going to attempt to get to GROW tomorrow. Even that's challenging, as with no petrol I'll have to ride, which will require good weather and motivation. Fingers crossed for both!

I hope things are going ok for you. Thanks for being here x

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy,

Good on your for thinking of giving GROW another try! Did you manage to get outside at all today? The sort of winter day here today that I really like - no wind, just crisp cold air and the bare tree branches looking rather lovely against the sky, and everyone out and about walking their dogs, and sitting having ice creams or coffees and hot chocolates in the pretty park - I enjoy days like this, they are lovely for walking - but i seem to have overdone it so I'm resting this evening..

I have a sort of friend here who suffers from bad shyness and social anxiety, and I managed to find a couple of books in the library today about it, so I will look at those to see if they have any ideas to help...

Sam looks very tired in his little face now, but earlier today he was enjoying the day and all the people and other doggies around...

Pension day tomorrow thank heavens. How are you going, do you get paid tomorrow too?

Anyway checking in to say hi and thinking of you and do let us know if you get to the meeting tomorrow and how it goes! Good on you! hugs.

[Paw Prints]

Hello Katy,

You did well getting out in the garden on Friday... getting stuck into the communal area sounds very enjoyable... though I will pass on having a dirt shower...

Lass have you googled the various support services that are in your town... not just the biggies like Vinnies or the Salvos... sometimes the smaller services can be of more help for things like sanitary items, food for you or the pets... I discovered this week that the local community hall here can provide food/grocery hampers... it was not a service I would have expected from them... often church groups provide help as well... another thought is have you checked out what assistance your uni can provide... even if it is just free sanitary dispensers in the ladies loo...

Don't be embarrassed to ask for help lass... it's not your fault the government sets support payments below the basic survival level... the people who offer these services know that...

My motivation has been missing for ages... like you I have been spending most of my days in bed... only making it as far as the couch when I do get up.... I do hope you can make it to the GROW meeting... getting some in person support... think how lovely that would be

Gentlest of hugs

Paws

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hello

Well I didn't make it to GROW yesterday as I ended up with a migraine and spent the day in bed. Never mind. Today the weather is glorious and I've watered the pot plants, walked Storm, and put some washing on. Pay day thank heavens, as none of us have food! I did some googling and there are a couple of churches and orgs that provide assistance, so that's good to know for future reference.

Paws - I'm sorry to hear your motivation has gone walkabout. I hope you can find it again soon. It was sounding like you had made a good start on getting your kitchen sorted. Does it help to set super small goals? Sometimes mine are as small as throwing one item in the outside rubbish bin.

Hanna- I love that you mentioned the bare branches against the sky backdrop. One of my favourite things - my camera roll is full of shots of just that!

Well just a quicky post as I'm stiff and sore but currently full of painkillers, so best to do stuff while I'm ok to do it 🙂

Hugs, hugs, Katy

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy,

Sounds like you had a productive day! Good on you.

Yes, yesterday was the sort of winter day I just love - and the bare branches against the sky were lovely....

I had a lovely long email from an old pal in coastal town - two of my old friends from there, her and another friend, are moving - one to New Zealand where her brother lives, and the other to an inland town up north (cold like here) to be nearer her partner - they always lived apart in separate houses and travelled to stay with each other, but my friend is retiring and buying a smaller place in the same town as her partner so they can be closer. I am glad for them but it's sometimes hard to be away from people I miss... but it's good to hear all the news

I am having a chicken wrap and cup of soup for dinner and settling down to an evening in front of the telly... with Sam snuggled up on a blanket beside me. Nice! oxoxox

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hi Hanna and all

Lovely that you still keep in touch with your friends from old town. I'm sure that perks you up.

Big day here - whipper snipped the back lawn, read a bit of my book and then went for a 5 hour coffee date with a uni friend lol. Sat at a coffee shop by the water, as it was such a lovely cool but sunny day. Ready for bed now.

Hope everyone's well x

[Paw Prints]

Hello Katy, wave to everyone,

You have been busy lass... the 5 hour coffee date sounds like it was fun... a definite bonus being by the water... I'm so glad the migraine didn't hang about & that you are feeling up to doing things...

I think with all you have been up to the last few days you have been sending motivation vibes all the way over here... I actually managed some cleaning in the kitchen this morning... little steps (well ladder steps) as I cleaned all the hard to reach bits...

Is the book your reading for uni or for pleasure?...

Belly rubs for Miss Storm

Hugs

Paws