Not coping after disclosure

[startingnew]

Please help me. Im really struggling.

last night i disclosed something that ive kept with me for 2 years now. Im already struggling with ptsd anxiety and depression but the event that i disclosed also comes under ptsd.

I rang a hotline and the first time in 2 years ive spoken about it and im so embarrassed and ashamed. I hate myself and blame myelf for it. And im terriffied! !

[demonblaster]

Hey our darlin Starts 🤗 dear Grandy 👩‍❤️‍👩 and readers 👋

Big Aunty Deebi hugs sweet girl. You've dealt with tremendous pain over the yrs I've known and cared deeply for you and you've always pulled through. Your staminas a credit to you lovely one.

If you're up to talking you know you have friends here.

If not sweety we can sit here and just be here with you.

I couldn't find your new thread the other day hun let us know when you do if you like.

It's good seing you back. I wish some light could be in your life. You deserve 🤗

Laters darl 💗🦋💗✨

[startingnew]

I just worry so much. I worry excessively over everything and over everyone even over minor things. Sometimes i worry so much that i feel physically sick.

I have even more diagnoses to manage too. All lifelong illnesses that require medications and so much management. Its how my days are spent now.

[demonblaster]

Hey darlin Starts you'e doin it hard aren't you.

I feel sorry that you really don't have much or any reprieve from mental pain and you've had a lot of physical too.

I guess but don't know for sure that anxietys causing you a lot of grief worrying about so much. One of the things the mindspot course said was to question thoughts along those lines. Will it be likely to happen? It kinda pulls us back into the now and encourages more rational thought that depression/anxiety hold us back from.

The trouble is our needed energy gets used on negatives which if we can learn to redirect can help towards belief in ourselves towards more positive outcomes.

I've wondered often how you are dear girl. It's good seeing you 🤗

You know we're listening and always when we can here for you.

You are deserving hun what makes you think you're not?

Sending love peace and light dear girl.

🦋✨💭🌞🕊

[startingnew]

Thank DB xo

It is quite tough atm. ive done a few mindspot courses and they were ok. I know my mh is going down hill when i can find anything that helps. at the moment im having more bad days then good.

I am trying to manage 5 different food allergies, 4 of which are main food groups and 3 of which are basically ingredients in everything so its really hard. On top of that i also have severe IBS and a digestive system that doesnt work properly most days so im always having to manage it. I also have been diagnosed with a health condition which means i likeley wont have kids and to manage it i have to be on medications that cost me $90 a month plus extra medication and suppliments. Just recently its also been confirmed i have 2 permanently damaged nerves in my face and i also have a few nerves damaged within a muscle in my back/neck from a horse accident.

its just getting really hard right now.

Oh and my new thread is called 'Struggling with anxiety and self doubt over good opportunity'

[Doolhof]

Hi Sartingnew and greetings to all reading,

I am so very sorry that you have so much to deal with. It can be extremely tiring, exhausting and overwhelming when there is so much to deal with.

Is there one small thing you can do for yourself right now that might help? I know it may seem pointless when you have a mountain of stuff to deal with. It can make a difference, even if it is just a fleeting pleasure.

Your struggles do sound very difficult and it is understandable you are struggling. People here care for you so much. It is a wonderful place to reach out knowing people validate what you are experiencing is tough.

Wish I had some wise words for you. Thinking of you and hoping you have a glimmer of hope today.

Sending you kindest thoughts, regards from Dools

[startingnew]

Hi Mrs D, nice to see you

Atm where i live we are in a strict lockdown so it makes it hard to do anything right now and i found out i was classed a a casual contact and had some cold symptoms so ive had to go get covid tested. lucky its a weekend where its crappier weather so its better to stay inside and do nothing. hopefully i hear back today sometime or tomorrow morning.

ive just been studying and watching tv atm. im quite fatigued so a break for the weekend would probably do me some good. feel like i should be spending the time cleaning up rather then wasting the day though.

[Doolhof]

Hi Startingnew,

I've just had a chat with you on my thread. I might repeat myself here. I am in quarantine for 2 weeks so need 3 Covid tests, is this the same case for you?

I have found it helpful to make some plans as to how I want to spend the day. If I don't do anything on my list that is okay as well.

Depression and mental health issues don't disappear just because we are in lock down or in quarantine. It may be mentally impossible to achieve much at all some days, so just do what you can.

I know what you mean regarding wasting the day. I feel like I should be using this time to clean the house, tidy the shed, weed the garden, clean the gutters, cut some fire wood, wash the windows and do a hundred other jobs I have not been able to do anyway due to my depression!

Hope you are able to plan a balanced day today! Cheers to you from Mrs. D.

[Doolhof]

Hi Satrtingnew,

Just dropping in to say Hello and to hope that you are okay!

Thinking of you and sending you kind thoughts and comforting wishes. Hugs from Dools

[startingnew]

Hey Mrs D

thanks for stopping in. sorry for not responding earlier. My studies are proving to be harder then i thought and taking alot of time and brain power. takes me nearly 4 days just to do an assignment. the last assignment was 10 pages long!

And ive spent most of today at my drs clinic as i was injured by a horse. under going some tests.

Thankfully mine was a precautionary test so i could just get the negative result and come out of isolation after i got the results.

its so hard sometimes. we need to keep busy to manage the depression but sometimes the depression stops me from doing things!

i hope your day has been pleasant. we have some beautiful weather here. its so nice to just soak up abit of sun but without the heat so much

[Doolhof]

Hi startingnew,

Hope you are okay after the horse injury. They certainly are large animals!

Wishing you all the best with your study. I have not studied for a while now, but know how much I struggled with it at times. Hope you do well with your assignments.

We had a dull day yesterday and unfortunately my mind matched the weather and I achieved very little.

its so hard sometimes. we need to keep busy to manage the depression but sometimes the depression stops me from doing things!

I so agree with this comment. I struggle with this myself.

Hope you have another moment in the sunshine. All the best to you.