I can't find the right place for me to post

[Moonstruck]

I don't know any more where to put a new thread if I make one, or which ones to join in. I always used Anxiety because that is my major condition but that has been relatively under control lately - I feel Depressed today - but I don't qualify for the topics there either. I'm depressed mainly because there doesn't seem a place for me. I love some of the threads and personal thoughts for example in Staying Well, but I can't join in there, because I don't have any tips for Staying Well.

I tend to have almost paranoid thoughts through over-thinking "problems" that I would like to talk over but don't know where to talk them over before they reach the paranoid stage...I want to avoid that. I join in the Social threads saying light hearted jokey things because thats the only place I seem to belong.

I dwell on any problems my adult sons have in various aspects of their life and want to "fix things for them" - our relationship is very loving and close though - they are wonderful to me - so there is no real "problem" with my relationship with them....so I don't seem to belong in the "relationships, family" section either do I?

I worry about them all the time - when I tried to express this on forum I think it was misconstrued that I had "empty nest syndrome" - trying to adapt to my sons' leaving home....No, that's not it...they've been gone for years and years...I am a grandmother.

I liked the Getting to Know You, or is it Me? thread very much - but have been given suggestions how to start my own thread and what section to use etc and get the feeling I'm being steered away from there too.

So I am still confused. I don't feel particularly anxious today, so this shouldn't even be in Anxiety! Do you see my dilemma?

In fact the more I write the more I feel like crying - I don't know where to go next.

[CMF]

Dear Moon,

I think you've earnt the right to take a nap whenever you like. You mentioned you attend your hobby till late in tge evening at times. You've worked & still do, you've raised children, run a household etc.

You can lie down & take a nap whenever you please. You deserve it.

Luv ya

Cmf x

[Moonstruck]

Yes...of course you are all correct. It's almost midnight now and I got home about an hour ago.....fixed myself a late night snack { after a lively evening with my group) gave the cat some attention and some food, not tired in the least....must be running on my stilll high energy......so I guess its understandable that during the day is my "quiet time" the opposite of most people.....some are early morning people, others are night owls. No need to wonder which one I am!!

Social media has had a lot to do with lowering some people's self esteem and make them question their own ways of life I reckon....you know when you see photos posted from your friends or acquaintances at this or that meeting, or business lunch, or family reunion, or on holiday....it's always "blissful"and they always look terrific....it makes some of us think how boring and mundane our own lives are.

It's hard not to compare oneself with the glossed up images we see on fbook.

{ and I reckon you can relax Croix..I can do it!!)

[quirkywords]

Moon I find I am often my own worst critic as I compare apples with oranges. I don’t take notice of social media , I just tend to compare what people my age have achieved and what I have not. I am aware of what I do.

[Moonstruck]

Quirky...you're right about social media...it has its place...but we are all unique with our own beauty and strengths and its pointless comparing our selves with the bright smiling well dressed people posting the beautiful photos...perhaps I am just jealous.

If Croix is reading this, I have to let him know that I am winning my current team challenge and So o o oo relieved and congratulating myself. { even though we were taught as kids not to do this...why was this? why did some parents discourage kids' admiration of themselves and not to "get too big for your boots" sort of thing?

At the beginning of the game I realised there was no one actually physically present to hug me, buoy my confidence, give me a "good luck" gift etc....and the odd thing was I was aware that there was "someone" to be with me....it was "me, myself" A few times I actually said...to myself that is..."I am here, I will get you through this, don't worry, I've got you"............I wonder where that "voice" came from? I suspect it was Me!

anyway I have turned some sort of corner....I think....I hope.....it's a start I guess......

and CMF....yes our manifestations worked...they aways do, you know! Love,Moon S

[Croix]

Dear Moon~

Would you want to be part of that Kardasian set anyway- a bit on the shallow side and so artificial. One would end up bored silly.

Now your bowling efforts that's different, real skill there. And no I don't see why one cannot be pleased with oneself. I know often enough I'm unhappy with myself, so when I'm pleased it's only fair -a balance if you like.

As for what parents discourage, mine taught me all the wrong things which I later had to 'unlearn', so I don't always place a lot of faith in some of those ideas.

"Each class preaches the importance of those virtues it need not exercise"

Dunno if it was CMF's manifestations or your raw talent - maybe both

Croix

[Moonstruck]

Croix...just letting you know if you are still interested...that my challenge is completed and a success and celebrated by all. It did take a lot out of me which I am noticing now it is over, both mentally and physically but the result was marvellous and I am seeing it as a personal breakthrough for me....as evidence the"old me" just might be making a comeback even though she will be a little bit different. The death of someone close to you cannot help but make a mark in some way.

However I am still here and it appears my natural abilities and coping mechanisms have remained pretty much intact. I had to dig deep though and was very doubtful at the beginning, as I think I expressed here. I did not know if Moonstruck was still there and would still be as strong as she used to be.....big signs of relief just now, and gratitude....thanks for encouraging me.....love,Moon S.

[Croix]

Dear Moon~

Of course I"m still interested, though your news is not news to me -or the other readers of you thread, we know you too well.

OK, so the growth can be very painful (the passing of my first wife being an example similar in some ways to your horrible time), but you emerged and can think back with satisfaction on what you have accomplished - despite all -and have confidence in what you are equal to in the future .

I did not do much encouragement you know, just occasionally reminded you of the person you are

Croix

[quirkywords]

I finally found this thread Moon.

I do hope you are still posting, I know it is hard. 

[Croix]

Dear Moon~

I have not seen you around the forum that much recently -I admit it could be me, I'm not navigating very well, or perhaps you have been reluctant ot do so.

Either way I do think of you and care. I wonder how you are getting on?

Croix

[Croix]

Dear Moon

I saw your post in hte thread "How can we improve the forums"  a couple of hours ago

To reach me goto Croix Parler

https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/bb-social-zone/croix-parler/td-p/195867/page/136

If you are not at the end of any thread normally you can scroll down to the bottom post on  the page and you will see below it numbers in squares, click on the highest number for the latest page of posts.

Nice to hear from you, we'll sort out your contacts.

Croix