I always do things ass about

[velvetfaerie]

My first introduction thread after being here FOREVER..... because I always do things backwards...

Velvz. Bipolar.... type? Not sure. I walked out of the psychiatrists office the day he tried putting me on more meds. That was a decade ago.

Anxiety issues. OCD issues. Occasional SH concerns. Checkered history of substance abuse.

I manage for the most part by exercising, good healthy food and good sleep practices. Substances these days are 3 drinks maximum and I'm rat assed.

I work full time. Study part time. Bought my own house years ago. On my own. Ok the bank helped lol!!! Most days for me are 10-14 hours depending. That's work and study and house things and exercise.

At the moment I'm struggling because I believe I've burnt myself out and pushed myself into hypomania. I'm all over the shop. Been here before but no psychosis stuff. Woo.

Oh man I don't know what else to say. No kids. Love kids. But conscious decision not to have my own. Love men. But sadly I'm intolerant to relationships after a while. Moody 😁😁

Animals and music are my passions.

Yeh so..... **** awkward silence***

velvz.

[velvetfaerie]

I just spat it at him.

im over it. Over being last. All the damn time. I’m over his lack of investment.

I cant handle it anymore

[CMF]

Sometimes we want to hold onto relationships because we are used to being in them and we can't see beyond them. I know the feeling of not being worth fighting for too. Big red flag for the future, it wont just be this situation, it is a trait..

From outside looking in it seems clear what you need to do, but easier said as i am not in the situation. I have been in my own life but I can't speak for your feelings.

[velvetfaerie]

IS ok.

Thanks for your support CMF you’re awesome.

I am very upset atm and can’t communicate well.

[CMF]

Hey you,

how are you doing?

[velvetfaerie]

Not good.

mums here.

[CMF]

Ok, I'm glad you have your Mum with you. I don't like the thought of you being alone feeling so upset.

im off to bed but vent here as much as you need to.

Hugs and take care.

cmf x

[velvetfaerie]

I’m broken. How hard is it when two people want to be together? I obviously wasn’t good enough for him to stand up to her manipulative ways. You can’t have a relationship based on texts and a couple of hours together a month. My self esteem is in tatters.

We were best friends.

I don’t know how to stop the pain.

Once their house is gone we may have a chance.

Until then she uses the house and kids to stop him doing anything. He can’t even see his friends. Yet she gets to go out, socialise etc.

That breaks my heart too.

It hurts so much. I can’t sleep. I ache all over.

Thank you friends for being here. I’ve been neglecting you all. Mentally, emotionally, physically I’m shutting down.

[velvetfaerie]

Just found something.

He and his “ex” have been over for 9 years.

A public post on a buy and sell page has him referring to her as the Mrs last year.

i feel sick and can’t stop crying.

[Guest_1055]

Ah Velv, I am so sorry .

Me xx

[CMF]

Oh Velvet,

How long have you been together? I ffeel your pain and I know it, been there, in a different way but similar situation. It shouldn't be that hard. She is very controlling, this is what makes it harder as it's a third party causing this. All he has to do is stand up to her, it makes me sick, I've been there.

what was the public post for? I know how sick this makes you, I've been there too finding something on the internet. I totally understand how you feel. Are they actually divorced?

Sorry to ask so many questions, I'm baffled. Sounds like you need to sit down and have a good talk, get everything out. I find I'm really shut down if I do these things at home. I used to find it easier in a public place. Maybe I felt safer with people around. You need answers and then need to work out if he has really actually let go of his marriage and is ready to move on. Of course his kids are priority but the ex isn't.

my heart breaks for you Velvet, here for you.

cmf x