Alone..Depressed..Sad..

[Ggrand]

Hi..I'm new here..just need to put my feeling down..no one to talk to makes depression and anxiety so hard...the last 4 days I have either been in bed crying or on the lounge crying..I can't seem to get out of this...I am becoming a prisioner in my own home as its getting progressively difficult to go out.. I have to go out Tuesdays so I do everthing on that day but it's like I'm holding my breathe all day until I get back to the safety of my home then I can let go and that starts the cycle again of spending the next 6 days at home either in bed or on the lounge sad and depressed...I really feel like just giving up.. My husband passed away 4 years on This coming Thursday. My children live 6 hours drive away and have small children so I don't see them that much.Bad mum and grandmum I am on there last visit i was pleased to see them but I just wanted them to go home. I feel so aweful and numb atm..

[Peppermintbach]

Hi gorgeous Grandy (waves to all),

I agree with DB and Lee about perhaps just focusing on taking care of yourself for now...

Everything else can wait...now is Grandy’s time...your time...

Like everyone else, I’m by your side peacefully and keeping a caring eye on you. But I’m not saying much for now to let you rest and have some calm...

Much love and comforting hugs plus some treats for your fur babies...

Peppy xoxo

P.S. Wonderful Mandy, I know how much you’ve been struggling lately. Perhaps just take your time with posts and visiting people’s threads. Just whatever you can manage/feel comfortable with is more than enough. Sending love and hugs...

[demonblaster]

Hey lovely/s 🤗

Hope todays a bit brighter for ya darlin and that you're getting more quality sleep.

Just wanted you to know you're in my thoughts with love and care.

Oh Grandy thank God for ph: reminders yikes was considering not going to MH group woke again at about 4 ish took about 2 and half hrs doing a post and woah forgot I have 2 other appointments today. Phew. So no hope of back to bed like I was thinking to do.

Point of this rabbiting on is I'll see you later today.

Yes seriously look after you hun I'm enjoying staying at your place oh and breaky and hot pot of tea brewing for when you wake.

Much love huns. Sounding like your strengths kicking back in to pull back up lovey. We've got it there haven't we.

So much love ☺💑💜

Hi back Lee 🖐 and Peppystar 🤗 for all who wants 💗

[demonblaster]

Look after yourself precious Grandy.

Love you (( xx ))

Hope you're travelling better.

[demonblaster]

Hi beautiful friend 💜 and all you lovely people 🤗

Sweety girl I know it's incredibly hard for you even in your ok times let alone now.

Your deeply lodged with so much love in my heart 💗 and I know so many others here feel so much for you too because of the beautiful person you are.

It's a shame we're not allowed to put pressure on eachother here 😆 because not having a dose of you in my daily routine of life 😢.
BUT ... I get it sweetheart.. you need time to process and work through it all. Oh God do I get it.

Darlin RUOK?
Would it be ok if you could just do a winsy widdle tinsy thing for me (on top of the thousand things you've done for me to make me feel so loved and secure in our growing friendship)...

Our emoji status code. Just one or even just a single word so I/we know you're ok Grandy please.

Honey I loved you saying you've gotta pull yourself up, that's right. SO hard but we've got the goods to do it and as we know if we don't it deepens.

Always UBOK Grandy miss you but understand. 💜 you deeply sweet friend 💑🦄

🤝 never letting go. We don't give up on ourselves because then beasty wins!

[Lee lee 73]

Morning dear Grandy ..and everyone.

I do hope you are ok too beautiful..you are important to us, you are in our/my thoughts lovely Grandy.

I hope you are able to smile at least once today...! Lots of self care beautiful lady.

Love Lee

[Guest8901]

My very dear friend Grandy,

Please ... there is no pressure whatsoever to reply. Just take as much time out as you need to get yourself stable. I am just here to let you know I am always thinking of you, and willing you to get back in control of your life. You said you know how to do that and what you need to do. So please use this time to ensure you give yourself every opportunity to do that.

You have definitely had a hard time of things these past months - both mind and body. I hope the past couple of nights have enabled you to get some decent rest, to help promote recovery.

Have you been able to contact your younger brother yet? How are your two little doggie companions? Have you been in touch with your MHN, and has she been helpful to you? I'm very grateful to your friend Betty for being there for you during your times of need. I only wish I could physically be there for you too.

You can see that your many good friends here are all very concerned for you. I know you have gained comfort and clarity through posting on the forums in the past. A brief post when you're feeling up to it would be wonderful. But please do it for you, not for us, and only when you feel ready.

Much love and care coming your way.

Amanda 💕

[Ggrand]

Hello Deebi, Lee, Amanda...and Everyone,

Im sorry Deebi and all, I really am....I feel so trapped....I’m hurting really bad.. my neighbour yelled at me yesterday morning about my friends, I defended them.. Then my neighbour laughed at me and kept yelling at me putting me down so much....
Im struggling very much to stay here....I spent a long time yesterday up at our Beautiful look out just sitting there looking and thinking about things and my life....Then I spent an hour or so with metal Health helpline and they patched me through to my doctor, speaking to both of them..while I was up there... They wanted to send an ambulance up to get me down...I’m too scared to go outside incase my neighbour is around...

[Ggrand]

Honestly..you people don’t need this or me...atm...

[Guest8901]

Thats not the point Grandy. You are always there for so many others, whether you need to hear all our problems, or not. Thats just you ... you like to help people, to be there for us. We all want to be here for you now Grandy, in whatever capacity we are able to be. I know that is limited, given the nature of anonymous forums, but Grandy ... let us give something back for all that you have given us in the past. Now is when you need us, and we all need to feel useful, to believe that we may actually make a difference to others.

Please ... if there is anything any of us can do ... just let us know. Even if its just to listen, and allow you to release your thoughts and fears. But meanwhile .. please ensure you have your phone charged and handy so you can call a help line if things start to go downhill too badly.

I am so sorry everything is so bad for you right now. But you know you can get through Grandy, you have in the past, and you will again. You're getting good at this now! Have you ventured into your coping box lately? Perhaps now is a good time to do so. Remember to breathe, and absorb the sights, sounds, touch and smells of nature around you.

A gentle understanding hug to you.

Amanda

[demonblaster]

Oh darlin 🤗 that horrible neighbour! If she knew you she'd be the last person on earth to say a bad word to you.
Hey so proud of you defending your friends. Now use that for yourself, she's clearly got issues as hard as it is to believe it's her not you Grandy.

So glad you rang MH and hoping you got a load of pain out with them.

Good on you Mandy 🤗 I thought but forgot to mention your grounding box sweety.

Can you ring your MHN. Hope you can get onto your brother soon too

Precious friend I know you're in a terrible place atm and everythings mounting up. It's awful not being able to physically be there with you to look after you but virtually we all are. Let it out darlin we know how dangerous stress is when it stays in.

Sweety do you think it might be best to try and get to hospital so they can give you something again to calm you and help with sleep. We don't want you going furthur down

Please don't feel we don't need this, it's why we're all here to look out for eachother, lean on us lovey.

We need you more than you know and it's your turn for us to help you

Grandy the way through is to keep pushing on. There's only one choice from here and it's up. 🤝 Draw on your strength honey it's there. Breathe nice and deep and remember not to accept first thought, look deeper and find some positives they're around

Love you Grandy you mean the world. Please be ok. Talk when and as often as you need darling 🤗💜💑

🦄

🕊