Alone..Depressed..Sad..

[Ggrand]

Hi..I'm new here..just need to put my feeling down..no one to talk to makes depression and anxiety so hard...the last 4 days I have either been in bed crying or on the lounge crying..I can't seem to get out of this...I am becoming a prisioner in my own home as its getting progressively difficult to go out.. I have to go out Tuesdays so I do everthing on that day but it's like I'm holding my breathe all day until I get back to the safety of my home then I can let go and that starts the cycle again of spending the next 6 days at home either in bed or on the lounge sad and depressed...I really feel like just giving up.. My husband passed away 4 years on This coming Thursday. My children live 6 hours drive away and have small children so I don't see them that much.Bad mum and grandmum I am on there last visit i was pleased to see them but I just wanted them to go home. I feel so aweful and numb atm..

[demonblaster]

Grandy darling we hold eachother up and look out for eachother, we're in this together.

IT is not going to destroy you honey you're much stronger than it is. Remember the thoughts are ours, it's up to us to direct which we feed and which we pay no attention too.

Sweety don't allow emotion to pull you down please Grandy try hard. I can't do this without you, we all need you and want you to be ok.

Remember you reminded me to be mindful. Darlin you can get past this, we're with you every step of the way.

Please Grandy try and rest and distract your mind. What about that excellent water app you said changes when you touch it. I got the one with the ones you can choose sounds its nice and its got your wind chimes.

What about a game of bubbles.

You can get on top dear Grandy. I'm right here darlin. You're going to be ok sweety lady, really big hug. 🤗

Love you Grandy. Please hold on 💜💑🕊👼🦄 we've only just started our beautiful friendship 🌹

💗

[Ggrand]

Hello Deebi, Amanda and everyone,

I just came in to thank you for your help and understanding today....I'm sorry about being a problem..

Im still in hospital, and I'm under the blankets hiding my tears 😭...I have this feeling that has come back to me of being trapped and theirs no escape.....

Im worried about my dogs..I told Betty to please open my back door enough for them to get inside when they want to...at least they can sleep inside tonight..I'll never forgive myself if anything happened to either of them...because of me being so stupid.....

I will prob be awake again tonight..I can't sleep in hospital and a strange bed and I need my pillow..it's a special one..

I will answer all of your beautiful Everyone has written me as soon as I can..right now my mind is one big blob of mashed potato I'm can't think, I'm confused...

Love you deeply Deebi....💜🦄👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩..

Sending my Love and hugs to everyone...💜🤗🤗🤗...

please... sleep well tonight....dream sweetly.....and wake up refreshed tomorrow....

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩🌹Grandy🦄👼..

[Guest8901]

Dear Grandy. Just read your post to Depression thread. Obviously Deebi did too.

Very concerned about you lovely. I know most new ADs are very tricky initially, and for you they started at a terrible time, re anniversay. Its combined to leave you very vulnerable right now.

Deebi has provided some wonderful advice, and I hope you feel in a position to follow some of that advice. This will not destroy you Grandy. The way you feel right now is not permanent, its merely a transition period.

Please stay with us, and we can all fight this together. There is strength and safety in numbers. And you have an abundance of us here willing you to hold on tight.

Did you make it home, or are you still in hospital?

Amanda

[Guest8901]

Oops sorry Grandy, we must have been posting at the same time.

I see now that you are still in hospital. Im sorry thats the case, but perhaps its best for now. Hopefully things will seem better tomorrow and you may get home.

At least you have made arrangements for your dear little dogs to be warm and snug tonight in the house. I hope you feel better knowing that.

I guess there are times we must learn to accept what we cannot change, and remaining in hospital is one of those things.

Try to rest up, gain strength and try again tomorrow to get home. Your MHN may be of assistance then too, being a weekday.

I will check in on you during the night, so please post if it helps.

Sending love.

Amanda

[Ggrand]

Hello Deebi, Amanda, Everyone..

Deebi....your post made me cry very hard..I wanted to give up trying...I want this constant hurt to end...you are right Deebi.....I'll try harder I promise.....We pull each other up...one without the other won't work....I'm sorry, I wanted to stop trying, it's easier to go down with emotions..Deebi, you and Amanda are both right, I'll try harder to pull up...

Amanda...Please please don't sit up or check on my thread tonight...You need sleep, as much as you can get...I'll not be posting on my thread tonight...So please rest your mind and sleep...I Ve already made to much fuss about me and I hate being fussed about..im sorry really sorry about that...geez, everyone here has problems, without adding mine on top.... I should learn to 🙊..

Special hugs..and really thank you both very much...thank you everyone....you all mean a great deal,to me....

Grandy....

[demonblaster]

🤗 Good girl thank you that you're going to try harder. So pleased to hear that.

Sweety how bout counting back in threes from 1000, worse scenario it'll bore you to sleep. You'd be pretty exhausted I guess so you may not get to 0 this time.

Be ok beautiful friend 💗💑💜👼

Love you sweety lady, you have some quality sleep now and wake feeling fresher and stromger precious lady 🤗😚🕊

🌹

[Tess2]

Dear grandy,

i am so sorry that you are having such a hard time and feel so low. Being away from home is awful and you are so worried about your little dogs. I wish I had something I could say that would make you feel better, but I don’t know what to say. But please hang in there and listen to the love that is being sent your way . You mean a lot to people here. And they want o help you through.

love to you. Tess

[Peppermintbach]

Hi lovely Grandy and all,

I read that you’re in hospital and feeling very overwhelmed, feeling trapped and missing your dogs. My heart goes out to you...I feel the sadness and pain...I’m sure your dogs will be okay though...dogs are very resilient and they will wait for you.

I’m glad your lovely friend is helping out though. If you haven’t already, could you maybe ask her to take care of them/check in on them daily while you’re in hospital? I know how big your heart is, and that your fur babies mean the world to you...

I’m with you in spirit and my heart is enveloping your fur babies with love and affection ❤️

Much love and care,

Peppy xoxox

[Guest8901]

Good morning Grandy. How are you feeling this morning? I've thought of you all night, but didn't want to overwhelm you with messages.

Anyway its now a new day, and hopefully a much better one for you.

I wont outstay my welcome, I just wanted to drop in a couple of gifts for you. A bunch of beautiful pink and white fragrant roses 🌹🌹 and a life sized soft fluffy toy dog to sit on your bed 🐩 🐕. Perhaps your 2 will claim it as their own when you get home.

Right'o can't stay, breakfast to get ready here. Left you a few treats to eat too. ☕🍰🍔🍞🍤

A quick hug as I leave.

Amanda 💕

[demonblaster]

Hey beautiful friend 🤗 how are you feeling today. Hoping you managed to count a few 🐳 before you got some sleep.

So hope you're feeling more oomph and stoking that 🔥to get on top treasure.

Have you been eating and drinking hun. Sneaking in some of that amazing 🍰 you made for us all, oh it's beautiful. Of course it is, it was made from your heart💗

What beautiful gifts and posts our darling Mandy left you and lovely Tess and Peps visiting too. People wouldn't be bothered if you weren't such a beautiful person Grandy.

Love you very much sweety lady, please be ok so we can continue our journey 🤗😚💜💑🕊