Alone..Depressed..Sad..

[Ggrand]

Hi..I'm new here..just need to put my feeling down..no one to talk to makes depression and anxiety so hard...the last 4 days I have either been in bed crying or on the lounge crying..I can't seem to get out of this...I am becoming a prisioner in my own home as its getting progressively difficult to go out.. I have to go out Tuesdays so I do everthing on that day but it's like I'm holding my breathe all day until I get back to the safety of my home then I can let go and that starts the cycle again of spending the next 6 days at home either in bed or on the lounge sad and depressed...I really feel like just giving up.. My husband passed away 4 years on This coming Thursday. My children live 6 hours drive away and have small children so I don't see them that much.Bad mum and grandmum I am on there last visit i was pleased to see them but I just wanted them to go home. I feel so aweful and numb atm..

[Ggrand]

Hello Cala,

Thank you Cala..I am at a loss as what to say..your words are very kind..

Grandy..

[Speak Your Truth]

You don’t have to say anything Grandy, ❤️

But if you could think about it, a lot, and let the good, positive vibes flow gently over and around you like that silk scarf or a soft breeze on a warm spring day that would be so wonderful, so good for you.

You deserve it Grandy.

Cala 💖

[demonblaster]

Nigh nite my sweety darling 🤗😚

After you have that oh so good hot choccy and your baby marshmallows I'll tuck you in, gently hug you pat your back and sing 😨 which is guaranteed to put you in a coma 😴

You're staying at mine tonight ☺🤗

Always love you Grandy 😍💜

💑

🕊

🐣

[Ggrand]

Hello Dearest Deebi,

Thank you for the hot chocolate and tiny marshmallows, my favourite drink, thank you for letting me stay at yours 💜..You sing 🎶 beautifully by the way Deebi.., you put me to 😴 sleep..

Im giving darts a miss today, I'm emotional, confused and well I just don't know how I feel atm.....better I sleep my day away again..

Love you to Deebi, very much 💜🌹..

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩💜Grandy....xx

[Guest8901]

Dear Karen,

I'm sorry you dont feel up to darts today. But its okay to miss it this time, as you have been doing so well with a lot of other things. So dont feel bad for missing this one.

Please try to do something other than sleep your day away though. 😴 What else can you think of to do for the day?

Maybe you wont get too many more sunny days this week as I heard on the news a couple of days ago that the inland areas of NSW are likely to get some decent rain soon. Fingers crossed your area gets a fair share of that. Soon you may be able to sleep to the sound of rain on the roof.

So that being the case, perhaps its a good idea to get out in the sun with the doggies while the dry weather lasts. Its a beautiful day here today - warm, sunny, no wind, bright blue sky. I was out on the deck earlier soaking up a bit of Vitamin D while having a nice hot cup of tea, straight out of the teapot. Yep, when I make tea I always use loose leaf tea and proper teapot. Only way to have it. Otherwise I have coffee.

Sorry you're feeling emotional again and confused. Is there anything which brought this on that you're aware of? I too am very sad and emotional the past couple of days. I will explain on my thread when I feel up to updating.

Stay on top of things Karen. You're doing well, so keep it up and dont allow anything to bring you down. I'm sorry I havent been around much through the weekend. I realise you were a bit lonely with Deebi laying low, which I read on a couple of other threads. I should have come on and spoke to you, but I didnt really feel as though I could have helped much. Sorry. At least it sounds like Deebs is on the way back up. Hi Deebs. 🌹

Amanda 💜

[demonblaster]

Hi everyone ☺ and dear Grandy 😊

🤗 you need the extra long hug darlin. Ahh so your not travelling so well lovey. I'm guessing you're not sleeping well still because of sleeping in the lounge. Hoping your bursitis isn't causing to much grief and causing added sleep disturbance.

Something I'm going to get stuck into while I've got oomph happening which I hope can help you too is to update more positives in a list of anything and everything that gives or has given pleasure.

• Your fave colour is Purple
• Your fave drinks, hot choccy and Tia Maria
• lavender and vanilla scented candles and candles lit
• Rainbows the colours and 🦄
• the feel of cool air on your face
• looking at the cows and sheep that appeared
• stars
• Fantasy trips
• Crochet
• Your gorgeous fur buddies
• Times with Betty
• Sunny days

Now with each one take your mind to how you feel when you see or do them to put positives in instead of beasties dribble of lies. Maybe write the feelings they give you

I'm realizing we automatically listen and believe our first thought. What we can do is hear that (no choice) not feel it and think then on something good to break the rythym of downs only.

Don't forget to breath through pain focusing on counting in 1 to 5 and on exhale saying relax, you taught me that 👌

You're very welcome for hot choccy and care and thank you so much for your support and gorgeous meal you cooked me and looked after me and for the beautiful blanky what a thoughtful kind lady you are.

My turn to stay at yours, I'll top up jet propelled turbo Tina 🛴 with Weetbix and be there in .3 seconds. Wow when you 🛠 fix something you do a good job, I installed seat belts and an inflatable life jackett so I don't fall 🤕 off again and see 🦅🕊 birdies and ✨ circling above my head.

Love you sweet friend 💜👀 holding you tight and returning your kindness and care for me with my invisible wings around you. You're safe hun and we'll walk through this together 💑 🤝

Thank you from deep for being here for me when I shut down. I have 🎵 a lotta lotta work to do 🎶 and will succeed eventually in remaining open and communicating better. I'm here for you now sweety girl 🤗😚

[Tess2]

Hi Karen,

i hope you don’t mind if I call you Karen too. I am concerned that you feel so low and like Mandy would encourage you to try to get up and just sit on your lovely veranda and look at the world.

I drink mostly coffee but when I do drink tea I brew a pot too, I agree with Mandy that it is the best way.

I would not mind hiding in bed either, but have to do stuff to do with selling the house etc. It is very hard for me to do.

I am thinking of you

tess

[Ggrand]

Hello Deebi, Amanda Tess and everyone,

Thank you all for calling in...

Amanda...If I went to darts today and even if one of the snooties looked or talked to me in their uppity voice I would have cried..best I stayed at home....I'm fine..so please don't worry...

Tess..I usually make a pot of tea when I have one, thank you for calling in I appreciate your words very much..

Deebi...That list you gave me, thank you..I done what you said, I looked at each one then wrote out my feelings, thank you so very much, they helped to get me grounded today...I have been getting thoughts and images passing through my mind of some bads I went through since that trigger a couple of weeks ago..I was on top of this for months, That trigger a couple of weeks ago has started like a chain reaction to memories...I really needed your post today thank you...🌹🦋💜🦄..

Thanks for staying at mine tonight,,🛴..weetbix oil of the 🌲, 3 seconds, geez Deebi, too long to wait for you honey.,.Im fine Deebi, please don't worry.....I have to get back on top of this..I will..I did before I will again...

I have been working on part of your special gift last 2 nights.. I will deliver to yours later tonight...This 🎁 tonight is part 1 of three parts..

Love you so much as well Deebi.💜🌹.. I'm sorry this post is all over the place...I need to get a Demonblaster and Deendy together and shoo shoo shoof...the beasty away from me....

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩🌹Grandy...

[Ggrand]

Hello all,

i have posted..Not landed yet.,

[quirkywords]

Hello all,

Karen I have been reading as usual but I don’t post that much . you have lots of support here and a lovely caring community.

How are you Going?

I am always thinking of you and wishing you the best.

Quirky