Hi everyone, I'm back.

[Guest_4643]

Hi everyone, mb20lover here. I wasn't sure where to post this.

It's been a while since I was on the forums, so I just wanted to make a post saying that I'm back. However, I'll try my best to limit my time, comments, etc on here.

I won't bother tagging anyone, and I'll try to keep this as my only open thread that I have created.

I've missed everyone I've spoken to on here, and I hope to talk to some new people. I have been using my offline supports - my Psychiatrist, GP, Parent support of course, and a Social Worker. I'm in the process of finding a Psychologist but I'm having no luck.

Anyway, I just wanted to pop in and say hello, and also I hope I haven't upset anyone on the forums or anything like that because nothing was intentional, so I deeply apologise.

An update on me, I recently turned 21, can't do much with COVID though, it's a hard year for everyone unfortunately.

I also have a milestone, an achievement, I've been seeing my Psychiatrist for a year which is the longest I've stayed with a therapist. And I also finally have a GP I feel comfortable with. I'm on different meds that seem to be working a little but I still of course have my moments, but these meds I've been on the longest for out of any of the ones I've tried.

Other than that, please don't feel pressured to comment anyone, although it would be nice to connect with some people, old or new, but like I said that's okay. I just wanted to check in.

If you've read this and made it this far, thank you. Stay safe and take care everyone, as much as possible with the unfortunate COVID circumstances.

Thinking of all the Beyond Blue Mods & Users. I've missed everyone.

- mb20lover.

[Matchy69]

Hi Tayla its the nature of this site and seems to go quite on the weekend.I haven't had anyone on my threads at all this weekend.

[Guest_4643]

Yeah it's weird. I'm usually on the forums a lot because I don't have much else to do. Well tomorrow I'll be up early seeing my Psychiatrist then my GP.

[Matchy69]

Tayla what it's like I come on here just to talk to someone.No one really to talk to out of these forums.

[Guest_4643]

Me too Mark

[Matchy69]

Tayla I don't know if I help anyone but I do understand what people are going through.I wish I had sites like this when I was younger at least I would have had someone to talk to and express how I was feeling.

[Guest_4643]

Hi Mark, you do help.

Saw my Psychiatrist today and then my GP. They're not mad, I don't know why I always think that. My Psychiatrist asked why I thought he might be mad, I said because he's busy, has a personal life, etc. And he said yes that's true to a certain extent but he's here to help me.

He was concerned for me and said it was traumatic and to be careful, which I try to be, online and including places like this. He asked me if this helps, I said 50/50. If I find something that's triggering or whatever then I'll report it & go offline for a while.

My GP asked if I could bring in the conversation that happened on eHeadspace. I realised that the stuff that was said would be deleted but I can try. The mods didn't care. eHeadspace and the Headspace centres are nothing but a joke - they never emailed me or asked how I was after it happened. They never stopped it, they banned them and they came back as someone else. They should've banned them when they were saying overweight people are trash and should d**. Why they let that crap happen I'll never know. So it's on them, they never stopped it. They're basically saying bullying is ok.

They were both concerned. Got the receptionists to contact the clinic about my bladder, I asked if the clinic (GP) could contact me if they hear from them since I had to get lunch and didn't want to wait around since I wasn't feeling well in the stomach (probably anxiety).

But yeah the sessions were fine. My GP cancelled since he had his own Drs appointment so he cancelled his appointments that day.

[Matchy69]

Hi Tayla and thanks for the update.I knew your phychiatrist wouldn't be mad out you.He would be glad you told him what has happened so he can help you.He sounds like a really compassionate person and dedicated to his job in helping people.
The headspace thing was really bad.I don't know much about headspace but to allow that to happen and not follow up is bad.It should be a safe space for you to go on.
I hope you can hear from them about your bladder soon.I know just waiting for people can make you very anxious and thoughts of have they forgotten about me or did they get the referral enter your mind.I think they are just busy thats what I have found most times.
Take care,
Mark.

[Guest_4643]

Thanks Mark.

Not sure who the person is liking stuff but not replying?

[Matchy69]

Lot of people just read and don't reply.Sometimes you forget everyone can read your comments.So hi to everyone reading.

[Guest_4643]

Yeah true Mark. *TRIGGER WARNING FOR THIS AND STUFF BELOW, SORRY I DIDN'T PUT IT LAST TIME.*

I was reading back on another services group chat, my Doctor asked if I could print it out and give it to him in our next session. My Psychiatrist and GP said it was extremely unprofessional and highly unacceptable, and it was traumatic, they said they're sorry it happened and they're concerned, and sympathise with me about it.

However, the stuff that was said was deleted, so it would look like I'm making it up but I'm not. They said they blocked the person but they didn't, they're still on the chats, even that old one, under a new username. The mods and users were acting like I did it, like I made it up and it was a misunderstanding because they typed it and it came up after I said something. It seemed like it was directed at me. 

How is this person still allowed? I guess I can't print it out because the stuff is gone and it would look like I was making it up. I don't know what to do.