my life

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Originally posted by: rebekah on 30 December 2012

basally Ive been bullied my whole life my parents complain that im never happy but when ever they speak to me i start crying my mum doesn't understand my life she found out i harm myself and she keeps making stuiped comments like ''you should focus on work in class instead of harming'' or ''you stuiped bitch you think your so cool because you harm'' i can't take school any more i cant that my parents its just to much i just want to barry my self in a hole . even at school i get called emo and attention seekers half the time from a girl who harms her self and she told me she does it for attention so why call me an attention seeker half the time when people yell about my teachers here do go so good after that.

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Originally posted by: Neil on 20 February 2013

Hi Rebekah, I'm sorry to hear that things aren't travelling along smoothly for you. I'm also sorry to hear that you and your boyfriend have split up. It's never an easy time when this happens and things like this do hurt deeply. I know it's such a cliche and it probably sux to read this, but you've just gotta keep on battling away; take one day at a time. Have you had any luck with being able to get back to your counsellor that you had before? If not, do you have a doctor that you can go and see? I'm assuming you meant that your parents won't let you take on art, agriculture and music if your grades in maths and english don't get better? Before I ask about whether those subjects are mandatory or electives, can I ask, whether it's possible for you to seek out some assistance with maths and english? Like some after hours tutoring or even some lunchtime tutoring? I think at some schools, some teachers on different days offer things like that for students who find that they are struggling? I know it's probably the last thing that you'd want to do with your time at lunch OR after school, but it's just a suggestion and if you can take a minute to look at the bigger picture, if you were able to do something like that, for the amount of time that it 'might cost you', you might just end up with a real good result. Cheers, Neil ps: I hope this message didn't come over as being too hard; it sure wasn't meant to be that way.

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Originally posted by: David Charles on 20 February 2013

Dear Rebekah, How long did you go out with your boyfriend ? Don't worry about HSC electives - you can change them a bit and if you have trouble in the year you can always apply for the PATHWAYS programme and do Yr 12 over 2 years. Take the pressure off your life. My son had severe derpession and had to do the PATHWAYS programme and today he's at UNSW for the first time having scored 96 on his ATAR. Last year he couldn't even have a shower by 2pm or breakfast by 3pm. My query regarding losing your boyfriend and the length of your relationship is just a perspective thing. Would you have preferred he ditch you after a LONGER relationship ? I don't think so. He may have done you a huge favour by moving on and you now have a million other fish to swim with. Love should be mysterious, don't you think ? Unexpected ? Adios, David. PS If you self harm over all your boyfriends who ditch you it will just be reinforcing YOUR lack of acceptance. Not the boys - they are all gone. For good. Boys like that won't even be thinking about you so why give them any time / mind space ? Try and be mature about it. You are obviously worth it.

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Originally posted by: AnonAnon on 20 February 2013

hey Rebekah, I know you're only thirteen and the world you know is one very small bubble (applies to everyone growing up). So when something goes 'wrong' in that bubble, it's within such close contact to you that it becomes very uncomfortable and hurtful because you keep seeing it, because that's all you see. But... as we all grow older, the bubble expands and that world that you 'know' gets bigger. Things that once bothered you appears as an unimportant speck of sand because you now see that there are bigger and better things out there. Like what?? It's different for everyone. What do you like doing/tasting/smelling/doing that is nice? Do you like people? Why/why not? Do you want people to TRY to get to know you? Why/why not? Do you want to make friends? Why/why not? You have the power to make these decisions. Keep in contact, sweety. No one said growing up, or school was easy. That's why growing older is interesting and it ensures that we keep learning something new (about ourselves/others) everyday and year. Take care of your body because you'll need it 🙂 Best wishes

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Originally posted by: rebekah on 20 February 2013

Hi its fine ive been fine give it time.. i battle away. i am talking to eheadspace again but school cousllar im trying to aviod. my parents dont really know.yeah .math and english are core subjects music,agriculture and art are electives and what im good at my parents arent going to pay for a tutor and my english teacher and i are in each others bad books my old maths teacher that i had for 1 month has tutor group on wesnday cant do lunch because of argrucutlure and art interfere with lunch its like ive had two maths teachers samework sheet each have different answers

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Originally posted by: geoff on 22 February 2013

dear Rebekah, I am interested in how you feel about 'headspace' and what they are helping you with, as I have an elderly chap who speaks little english but he too goes to headspace. Google this and see if it may help you, and if it provides something for you that's great but if you need help on understanding it please reply to us, the site is 'any government help for kids who need tutoring in aus.' I have kept this in my bookmarks, so in the mean time I will look over it myself, and I will keep looking at ways to help you. Love Geoff. x

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Originally posted by: rebekah on 1 March 2013

i know my other reply didnt post but basically im not over my ex boyfriend, im not happy with him but i have to get over it i started self harming again

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Originally posted by: AnonAnon on 2 March 2013

dear Rebekah, we all want to help you and provide you with any support we can. Are you finding it helpful? It hurts to hear that you're self-harming again. Of course, there are other ways to deal with the hurt besides self-harming. If you keep cutting all over your body, marks will begin to show. What would you think of those scars in the near future? If you keep doing it, then that's your decision and we can't stop you. We're only here to support you. Keep in contact, sweetie. Find another way to deal with the hurt if you can. Maybe watch a comedy movie? Read a book? Practice singing? Best wishes

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Originally posted by: Neil on 3 March 2013

Hi Rebekah, Firstly, definitely not good that you've started self-harming again. I guess that's due to the breakup with your ex, yeah? With the other kids at school, have you kind of formed a friendship or two with some others?? I sure hope so, as this can definitely help with a lot of things; ie: going to school, having friends to talk too at lunchtime, etc, so it helps to occupy your mind and so you're not thinking about your 'ex'. I can't remember at all, but are you into sports at all? What about running? I personally find doing something physical is a great way to relieve stress and tension. Sure it doesn't always get the results that I'm after, but even just getting out for a walk or a run can be a good tonic ... for health, both physical and mental. I hope to hear from you soon again Rebekah, please take care of yourself and try to focus on something else when you get the urge to self-harm. THAT might be the time to head out of the house for a walk or something? Cheers, Neil

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Originally posted by: geoff on 4 March 2013

dear Rebekah, it probably wouldn't be appropriate for me to call you an affectionate name like the girls can do, so I won't, but you know what I mean. The medication I take plus the aspirin make my skin very sensitive, so when I scratch it from an itch it marks it badly and is 'on display' for people to see, especially in summer, but it soothes the itch when I do it, but then I have to wait a week or so for it to heal, so really I am doing virtually the same as you. Now I only rub it so that no skin is broken, it does soothe the itch. People used to ask me 'what happened' so I tell them 'it's the medication I take' but I do feel guilty after the event, but it's too late, the damage has been done. Is it possible for you to think of 'the after results' and the damage to your skin, and remember over your life span you will encounter many boyfriends that you love, and unfortunately lose them, but then find someone else. I know that I can sign off the usual way. Love Geoff. x

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Originally posted by: rebekah on 5 March 2013

I dont like sport really I dont but im going rollar skating again for school.im trying really hard not to self harm.