Is it too late?

[FragileFamily]

I believe my partner (or ex) and mother of my children to have traits that resemble someone with high functioning BPD. She has kicked me out of the house and I have the children most of the time. I really care for her and want my family back together more than anything. I've removed myself from the situation because she refuses to work on our relationship but is still making demands and contacting me almost daily. If I don't reply the texts keep coming. Im awear we are both responsible for the relationship breakdown not an illness but I'm prepared to work through it and she refuses to believe my concerns.

She wont let me back in the house and won't work on the relationship. I guess what I wanted to ask is it too late to change anything between us now I am out of the picture or try to help her work through what she is going through?

[nickypee]

Hi Fragile Family,

Sorry to hear what you are going through. BPD is definitely a complex disorder. I think you have done the right thing my moving out and asking your partner to work on the relationship. A relationship is a two way street and both parties need to work on it. Maybe it would be beneficial for you to get a mental health care plan done via your GP so you can go talk to a psychologist on your own? They can sometimes help you see things in a different light. Don't forget to care about yourself and do things to make yourself feel good. It's easy for everything to become about your partner as she sounds demanding and wants an answer right here and right now.

It's hard to say what the right answer is but if she is unwilling to work on the relationship, then I don't know what else you can do. Ring the beyond blue helpline as they are really helpful.

Good luck and let us know how things pan out.

[FragileFamily]

Thanks nickname

Yes I'm already seeing a psychologist and doing all the right things to look after myself. I just can't seem to let go or believe what is actually happening. I feel like there is nothing left I can do except let it take its course.

[FragileFamily]

I'm still really struggling and not much has changed. My ex wants to be "civil" in Co parenting but she's still very much trying to control me. I was really hoping for some more support from the forums.

[MishnLinc]

Sorry to hear this, I am in a similar position but just starting the journey. My Hubby is suffering depression and left. I am trying to ride it out but it is taking over me. I am struggling to believe its happening as we were a happy family at one stage and would love to have that back. Although I am starting to think it might not come back.

Take care of yourself.

[FragileFamily]

The situation just keeps getting worse.