Hi everyone, I am a first time mother and I really feel desperate to deal with my husband. Could you please give me some advice?
We met online at 2010 and married at 2013. On January 2014, I had our first baby. On February he was made redundant by his company which he worked there for 13 years. He went to depression episodes since March: he was missing twice, he was taken away from home by police once; he was admitted by psychiatric ward in hospital twice.
I felt very sad to see him suffer and I tried my best to support him: took him to see GP, searched the websites to find the treatment and psychologist for him, accompany him for the medical appointments, running between home and hospital to see him and support him. At meantime, I need to look after my baby and adjust myself as a first time mother with all sorts of pressure from life…
In September, he was diagnosed by psychiatrist with Dysthymic disorder (more than 20 years), Superimposing
major depression episode and Avoidant personality traits. And since October, we decided to go to private mental hospital for Day program training and his depression has been controlled. However, his personality started to change from a gentle person to a very picky and aggressive person. And his behaviour has become erratic and unpredictable. Under huge stress for nearly one year, my body started to show warning signs to me: my heart started to have extra heart beat and I can not breathe property but only with shallow breathing.
While I found difficulty to cope with the stress in life, he was so focus on “speak out his voice” and “fix the problems” on me. In December, he did family violence (emotional
abuse and isolation) on me. Under the help of social worker, I moved out with my baby and rent a property. And I took the advice from social work and applied intervention order from court. But on the hearing day, I decided to withdraw the application as I don’t want to hurthim. After I moved out, he has been very angry with me and he claimed to see baby and looked after baby by himself for 3 days a week. I scared about him and proposed supervised access. He did not like it and he did not allowed me to travel internationally with baby to visit my family until baby is 18 years old...we can not sign the parenting plan and I do not feel safe to take baby to him. Both of us felt frustrated! I do not know how to solve this problem except go to court.....
