Tired of fighting this battle.

[Beaser]

I hope im ok to post as ive posted so often on other  forums  but im feeling very desperate lately. 

Im just so tired of fighting. I left a job i was in for many years last year. I have since had some part time work that didnt work out.  Im lonely and going broke.  I was desperate and called triple o last week only to be left to my own devices again. I may be going into a facility called parc a non acute inpatient service but that thought scares me. I dont know how much more i can endure. I hope every one is well and thank you for reading      Brett

[Eagle Ray]

Hi Brett, you never know, something else may come up that suits you better, maybe another opportunity at the hospital but not on weekends, or flexible in a way you can still be active with the footy club. I'm sure the people at the hospital greatly appreciate your volunteer work. It is a good thing to follow what you know feels right for you.

Take care,

ER

[Beaser]

Hi and thanks ER.

Youre right maybe something may come up that suits my life balance a bit better.  Im off to my volunteer role today so thats a positive.  

I just wish i hadnt told friends that i went for the job as i hope i dont disappoint them or lose them by pulling out of the job.  Its been a roller coaster week to be honest and it has triggered me a bit .   I spoke to my physycologist yesterday  and he was understanding i might make an apointment with my DR if i can .

Thanks again ER wishing you a happy day.      Brett.

[Eagle Ray]

Dear Brett,

If they are good friends they will understand. It is very important to make the right decision for yourself. You don't need to please them or have their approval. Remember it is your life and it is ok to prioritise what works for you. I am glad your psychologist was understanding.

I understand it being a rollercoaster. It is challenging making these life decisions. I am having to make ones now in relation to the DSP application process and I'm finding it very triggering. But I think if you keep coming back to listening in to yourself and what feels right, that is what helps. I am trying to find that inner voice in myself at the moment.

Anyway, I am proud of you Brett. You are always showing courage trying to find the best way forward and you are a good human being, which is an achievement in itself. So I hope you know that about yourself and you can feel proud of yourself.

Take care,

ER

[Beaser]

Hi and thanks again for your kind and encouraging words. 

I hope you are going ok  yourself and im sorry to hear that your DSP application is triggering you. 

You are obviously a very caring and good person and you deserve any assistance you can get.  

Im going along slowly , and hopefully a break through in some form will come.        

Take care and have a Happy Day.        Brett

[Beaser]

Feeling a bit stressed today. I had a meeting with my other group of volunteers and i just felt so out of place. 

Im worried about what the future holds workwise and how im going to cope . I suppose we all have down days.        Brett

[Eagle Ray]

Dear Brett,

I understand. Sometimes when we don’t know what the future holds it is unsettling at times. I think probably the most helpful thing I’ve found when this happens to me is coming back to the present moment now and finding something today that is fulfilling to do or connect with. I love photography, so it might be going out and doing that. Or going for a walk somewhere nice. Or chatting to someone I feel comfortable with. Sometimes when I do those things the future starts to take care of itself, if that makes sense. So by being present now it’s like you are creating positive future moments. I know it can be easier said than done. I worry about my future too and how I’m going to manage. But if I come back to today and what I can do to manage today, it’s like things become easier now and therefore in the future too. I think so much of our worry in life is about the past or the future, but when we are caught in that we cannot live in the present moment. So if I am able to do it, I find coming back to the present moment and just being with that can really help. I hope maybe you feel a bit better today.

Take care,

ER

[Beaser]

Thanks again ER.

Sorry for the late reply as i havent been on for a few days. 

You are right so much of our worry comes from the future or our past .

Its always good to be around good people who we trust and care about. 

Im trying to remember this.   I think  ive struggled a bit with the very hot weather as i find it very limiting to what i can do.    It was 40 years exactly on Saturday that i lost my mother it was 3 days after i turned 18, and theres been a bit of reflection about that . I know that we all go through that and like everyone some anniversary's can hit us a bit.   

Im off to my volunteer role tomorrow so that is my thing to look forward too.   

Thanks    ER. 

[Eagle Ray]

Dear Brett,

Yes, hot weather can really be trying and add to feelings of vulnerability. I'm lucky it's not so hot where I am but I know it has been very hot for extended periods in many places.

That's really understandable regarding the anniversary of your mother passing. That was such a young age to lose her and it would have been very hard. My mother died three years ago and I have also been affected at the anniversary of her passing. It is quite complicated grief and I'm not sure I have any definitive answers yet about how best to deal with it, which is of course always a personal journey. But the one thing that comes up is always the need to be kind and gentle to myself, so I think if you can find ways to do that it may help you too. I know it's not always easy to do.

I hope you have a good day tomorrow in your volunteer role. Yes, it is great and important to have things to look forward to. I think if we can keep finding those things it gives us a sense of purpose and that life can be enjoyed.

Take care and all the best Brett,

ER

[Beaser]

Thanks ER.        

Im up and ready to head off to my volunteer role so thats a positive.   Im sorry to hear you lost your mother and yes it does affect us when anniversaries come up.  I hope youre going ok with things .

Hoping for a good day today for you and myself.          Brett 

[Eagle Ray]

Thank you kindly Brett. Have a lovely day 🙏🌟

ER