Hi, welcome
Well, you are a jewel, caring for your sibling. I honestly dont know how you juggle it all and maybe that's part of the burnout reason?
Have you tried to obtain respite? I know you can get it for aged care. So, I'd try local council, NDIS even your GP.
The balancing scale of - obligation, routine, study, responsibilities is heavier than - fun, laughter, social contact etc. When this occurs some people with low tolerance fall in a heap to a point when they have intrusive thoughts as you are having now. One important thing- you are likely NOT to have these thoughts once that balancing scale is righted. I know this from experience, life can turn around so easily with a couple of changes. Such changes, whatever they have to include, are worth such alteration to your life.
So - who cares for the carer? Your GP for a start- best to have regular visits (yes, expensive now) or just one visit. Discuss everything.
I dont know your siblings disability but seek out organisations that come under his/her umbrella. Ask them how you can get a break.
Last year we have my MIL with us. She was elderly, had Parkinsons and was in aged care the last few weeks. Sadly she passed away but I dont mind saying that we were both exhausted caring for her as much as we loved her.
Who cares for you the carer- you. There's no one else. Care for yourself, make sure your diet is good, exercise and be proactive. You are worth it.
https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/depression-and-the-timing-of-motivation/m-p/149724/hi...
https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/staying-well/meditation-words-of-wisdom-it-helped-me-for-25-year...
TonyWK
