Help..what help??

[Guest_1573]

I am totally disillusioned and over everything. My teenage son has been wreaking havoc. punching holes in doors, threatening to kill himself. I rang ambulance and 50 minutes they still did not come. He was then losing it more so I took him to my GP who I have known for years. He wrote a referral for a psychologist. That was one week ago. I rang today to enquire and apparently he has a two week wait. What is the point? Meanwhile I am suffering severe anxiety and depression....it is ridiculous. There is no help anywhere!!!! The one time I did call for help I got sent off to a revolting hospital where I was treated like a criminal?

This world is a disgusting place. I do not want to be here. I do not want to have to deal with my aggressive head case son. Nothing I do for him is good enough. He might be happy when I am gone as he will at least have a lot of money. I have nothing to look forward to at all. Just more and more of this everyday. I know I will be contacted by BB but again it is all lip service. Nobody cares and that is the truth. So...BB...don't contact me because I won't answer your call and I certainly won't be sectioned in a revolting hospital where I will be treated like trash.

I don't know the answer by any means but I can truly say that asking/begging for help and being ignored by everybody certainly DOES NOT HELP.

[white knight]

Hi, welcome

I'm saddened by this post because, frankly, I don't know the answer either. Best to be honest eh.

We here on this forum are mainly sufferers of some sort of mental illness so we are also limited. Effectively we have life experience in replying to your post unless a member has had a teenager carrying out similar behaviour.

Does your sons father have involvement in his life?

How old is your son?

Does he have any natural talents ?

What is his preferred future career?

Do you think he uses any banned substances?

Does he have siblings?

I'm sorry for all the questions.

At this time you likely can't say or do anything correctly in your sons mind. This can mean that you shouldn't blame yourself for his actions.

You are indeed accurate when you say "the world is a disgusting place" if you have to endure the negatives of society and its flaws like beauocracy, corruption, cruelty etc but on the flip side we often get opportunities later on in life that is the reverse of that. This usually occurs when problems blow over and in your case hopefully it will come if your son turns the corner on his actions.

So there is hope and that's my simple message.

I'd like you to try and care for yourself.

I'm here usually every day and members simply post when they feel the need.

TonyWK

[Guest_1573]

Thanks dear Tony for your response.

My son is almost 18. He has next to nothing to do with his father. I have tried to get help from his father but it has never ended up being help. If anything my son retreats further.

He does smoke weed but I figure if that is the worst he does I will let him be. I know that probably sounds crazy but anything to keep the peace. It is not meth or heroin......:(

He has struggled big time with Year 12 but after my making many calls it transpires he only has to do 12 hours contact per week as I spent a lot of money for him to attend a Cert 3 course last year. Which he excelled at. So that at least was worth the money.

He now wishes to attend uni midyear and if he plays his cards right he can do that. I know he is extremely clever. He is just feeling lost and troubled as most teenagers do. I am daily helping him move forwards and I truly hope he will excel at the subjects he has until July then he can leave school forever and study for Bachelor of IT or similar. Which is where his forte lies.

I love him to death do not get me wrong. Since I posted that a lot has changed for the better. I have been struggling with the school and the SACE board since October last year for answers! I only got them after hassling them daily! Seems every thing in my life has to be hard fought for. I do not give up and I told him that; he knows that very well.

We also have a new foster dog in the home. We lost our beloved girl 6 weeks ago and that tore a massive hole in our family unit. This new cherub is bringing us much joy and laughter (and I will be adopting her!).

As for me...well this has been my life for 55 years so I am well used to it. I know deep down that the only person who can help me is ...me.

Thank you again for your response. Much appreciated.

[james1]

Hey Panicmerchant,

I'm so sorry to hear about the struggles both you and your son are going through at the moment. I understand there's just so much going on at the moment and you haven't been able to get much help.

I also don't know the answer, and I imagine there's probably not one answer. There are probably a lot of strategies, a lot of attempts, a lot of pain, but also a lot of positive moments. The new dog, your son's Cert 3 course last year, and hopefully him going to uni mid-year.

Mental illness is exhausting, but my experience has been that once we can find ways to enjoy the good times, there is often another one waiting for us. And then we look for the next, and the next, and the next. It doesn't make the bad times any less bad, but it's a change and, hopefully, it's a slowly building reason to keep getting up the next day.

I think you are right in saying that the only person who can really do anything to help you is you, but I also hope we can be here to give you support when you need it.

James