Feeling trapped with narcissist partner

[Purple4]

Firstly I don't even know why I call him my partner as I don't even feel like I'm in a relationship. I feel really stupid saying this out loud as I am a 46 year old woman who should know better.

I have been in a 'relationship' for 6 years, a very one sided relationship. He takes and I give. I just don't know why I stay with him. I'm so unhappy but yet I stay.

My partner is also my boss at work which complicates everything.

He is sucking all the joy out of my life and I dream about life without him. My doctor asked me why do I stay and my response was that he needs me. He wouldn't cope if I left him.

I'm so down tonight after another hurtful degrading arguement with him and I just try to put my relationship in the too hard basket and ignore my feelings.

I dont have close friends or family I trust to talk to so I am very isolated .

Has anyone broken free from a narcissist? I'm just so exhausted.

[Guest_1643]

Hi Elsam

I'm sorry you're finding your life so entangled with this narcissist. Sometimes they really do sneak up into our space and then take over.
I would advise you to slowly build your self up - a change could really help with this, and I think soon you will find the strength inside, but i understand it isn't easy alone.
Obviously we are limited now with COVID but i would be recommending otherwise a trip without him or something totally seperate, to build up your idea of a life without him.

i would also gently challenge the idea that he needs you - as this is a common narcissitic ploy that they do. I found the idea of "supply" very interesting as it relates to abusers, they are looking for a fill or supply of energy from their victims, when the supply is used up they get it elsewhere. So it is not true need of that person, but just a need to feel propped up and soothed by a human.

[Guest_1643]

sorry purple21 i meant to direct that to you not elsam x