Controlling partner now has a serious neurological disorder.

[quirkywords]

I have mentioned about my controlling partner who is wonderful to everyone and to me about half the time.

He has just been diagnosed with a neurological disorder .He was angry as I was away when he got the news and then hung up on me as I offered some practical advice.

I wonder how people cope with a controlling partner who is unwell and will get worse.I want to care for him but am not sure my mental health can stand the stress of his anger and criticism.

I would like to start a discussion on this topic.

[ABC01]

Dear quirkywords,

I guess it depends on how much you can take and if it is degenerative or not. His illness. Love makes us tolerate a lot more than we think. But perhaps in that moment he was seeking emotional reassurance instead of practicality.

Your mental health does have to take a front seat in this too. You are just as important as he is. And there is not any shame in having to step back if you need too. You don’t need to leave entirely, but having a circuit breaker may be needed.

There is also a chance he maybe humbled by this experience and could change depending on what this means for his life now.

It is a good subject to broach.

I hope you get more answers.

ABC01

[quirkywords]

Thanks ABCO1

It is degenerative.I give him lots of emotional assurance and receive nothing in return. 
I don’t think he will change with this illness up but become more  critical and demanding. Of course people here and in my life will see me as a mean and selfish partner . When a partner has a degenerative illness they are see as being needy and angelic and any fault is family or partner.