Chronic instability/ moving house growing up and the repercussions now

Justaperson
Community Member

Hi I'm a 22 year old guy and this is my first post on these forums. I wasn't sure which section to write this in but I think at least what set off my mental health problems is rooted in the trauma I experienced primarily in my early teen years and teen years in general. So this is where I decided to start.

Let me go over my past as concisely as I can.

When I was 11 I was in the last term of primary school. Coming into my final term of primary school, my mother impulsively decided to pack up our lives and everything we'd known and move interstate for a new lifestyle. We sold most of our belongings or put them in storage and within a few weeks of chaos we were driving up interstate against our will for mum's new life.

Due to the word limit I'm going to greatly summarise the next year and a half of hell that was my and my siblings life. So we moved interstate with no long term house arranged to move into. We literally arrived at a short term holiday accommodation with just our suitcases to spend the next 6 weeks until my parents could "figure it out"... They didn't.

I spent the last term of primary school at a school where I knew no one. We had to move again shortly after. I started high school a term late and then left a term and a half later after barely making friends. We became essentially homeless, and due to a bizarre combination of factors, we were moving all over South East QLD, from temp accommodation to temp accommodation, in dodgy units that could barely fit us. I had to share beds with my brothers or sleep on a blow up on the floor. This went on for at least 6 months. Packing up our suitcases and taking trains to another unit or apartment every week at most. During this period we moved roughly 26 times, no exaggeration. And I missed the rest of grade 7.

When we finally settled for a few months, it was after another failed start at school that my panic attacks and dissociation started.

I'm at the word limit and have left out a lot of detail and haven't gotten into my future issues but initial responses would be appreciated as to whether this counts and trauma. I can tell you as a 12 year old, I was stressed and scared all the time not knowing where we were going next and waiting in the cold sometimes at night at train stations for my parents to find somewhere to stay. It was really distressing and disorienting for my brothers and I.

 

 

10 Replies 10

Sadonsmith
Community Member
Hi Justaperson, wow you have been through a lot in your life and I can relate to much of the trauma of having a mother who through her own issues, caused such pain. My father died when I was 10 years old, my mother remarried and when I was 13, her and my step father decided to 'start a new life' and move to country vic from Melb. I lost all of my friends and cousins (we were very close) I stayed for 4 years and moved back to Melbourne. The hardest thing for me when we moved away at 10, was to make friends and feel safe, so for you to have to go through this so many times breaks my heart. My hope is that you can continue with therapy and find some peace and calm in your life. It is hard for me to forgive my mother for what she put us through (there is a whole lot more stuff that she put us through) but I try to do the best I can to accept it and my therapy is a very big part of me being able to understand. I am glad that you have reached out in this way, again, I am hopeful that you will get lots of help and support.