What do you fear (today)?

[The_Abyss]

In line with my "when were you last truly happy" post, I wondered about what other people fear?

Is it an "every day fear", or is it a "just today" fear?

Do you fear getting out of bed? Do you fear opening the mail? Do you fear the phone ringing? Do you fear being alone? Do you fear the darkness descending? Do you fear confrontations? Do you fear rejection? Do you fear not feeling anything at all?

I wonder if just voicing that fear, sharing that fear, will help to take away it's power? Or will it give it life?

For me, my big fear at the moment is being found out. Fearing my kids or family will come across my posts. Fear a colleague will recognise my writing style or circumstances. Fear that someone will see through this big brave front I put on to get through the door each day. Fear that someone sees my vulnerability.

[CMF]

Hi Zenobia,

We haven't met so firt of all, nice to meet you :-).

I love your post to our beautiful Moon, it makes so much sense. I love this line

'Things change but in that moment your choice was right for that moment and therefore, if it turns out to not work, it is the circumstances that have changed but the decision was right at the time.'

If you don't mind, i am going to keep a copy of it to look back on. I think i needed to hear this also as i look back and think why did i do this or what did i do that, or i should have done it differently but you know what, I am still here and still trying and i have options and choices. I may be scared to try the other options but at least they are there.

Thanks

cmf

[Moonstruck]

Zenobia....I simply adore the song in French by the famous Edith Piaf.....Je ne regrette rein..

meaning "I regret nothing". I also have a quirky little ornament thing on my coffee table saying

"Life is short, break the rules - Forgive quickly. Kiss slowly Love truly. Never regret ANYTHING that made you SMILE." And yes I can hear the judgmental holier than thou perfect people tut tutting and shaking fingers at me....

yes I have suffered pain and heartache with several major relationships/love affairs in my lifetime. And you know what - I don't regret any of them! Do you know the song Love Changes Everything from Andrew Lloyd Webber's musical, Aspects of Love? I love Michael Ball singing it at the Albert Hall on u tube.

"Love makes fools of everyone...all the rules we make are broken...Yes Love , Love Changes Everything...brings you glory, brings you shame.. nothing in the world will ever be the same"

[Zenobia]

HI cmf,

Nice to meet you too 🤗

It is an honour that you think something I said was useful and that it is something to keep. Looking back at your posts, I see you are worrying about work next year... you have children starting school next year?

My workplace lost their contract and I will be out of work come the 1st July and It is one of the added stresses that sent me here to the forums.

Maybe we can share our job hunting adventures...

Zenobia

[The_Abyss]

Hello Moon, Zenobia, Gen and CMF

Gen, those fears must be truly overwhelming for you. Good on you for having the courage to voice them.

CMF - a very real fear. No matter what change we make in our lives, the change itself can be scary. What work did you do b.k. (Before kids)? It may be tough initially, but you'll be amazed at how quickly you adjust. Did you work between the others?

Zenobia - I love that line too. Makes so much sense.

Moon - so sad when we are separated from our pets and then neighbours make things so much harder for us. Good luck.

Now, my big fear today, is going back to work tomorrow. I have actually felt "normal" for the past 5 days and I'm dreading going back to work and potentially undoing all the good work. I don't like the person I have been for the past few months, and I am terrified of rediscovering her when I go back to my usual routine.

[topsy_]

My fear is for tomorrow. It will be an 8 hour drive home from the coast with me as the only driver. Driving makes me unbelievably tired. After awhile I can't distinguish tired from depressed. They feel the same.

We've been on holidays for a week & my father died a couple of days before we came away. He molested me for years as a child/teen & we had no relationship. I'm surprised at all the conflicting feelings I've been experiencing.

So I fear the drive & the "thinking" time while driving.

[The_Abyss]

Very real fear yellownanna.

I do a lot of long distance and I find it to be a danger time as well. Too much time to think. A good talk back radio station helps, loud music you can sing along to, the BB and other numbers you can call on hands-free and talk through your concerns, a trusted friend to talk with hands free, the games kids play - number plates, car colours, what ever else helps distract you.

I am sorry to hear of the death of your father and the history. No wonder you are conflicted at the moment. It would be a good idea if you can speak to someone on your drive (such as BB or Lifelife - pre-program the numbers into your phone) to help you sort out your feelings.

Good luck with your drive. Stay safe.

TA

[The_Abyss]

I fear falling back into old habits and regressing back into the abyss....

[geoff]

hello, my fear has always been birds flying over my head, and there is no way I would go into an aviary, I often mention desensitisation to many people but I never seem to have the time and I'm not currently seeing a psychologist. Geoff.

[Moonstruck]

I guess you'd rather not help me feed the beautiful lorikeets in my garden Geoff?

[Moonstruck]

I often fear making phone calls. I imagine how the call will go and play the words over in my head - mine and the other person's before I even dial the number. Sometimes I put it off till tomorrow, till later, till whatever - I'd much prefer texting or emailing.......something about the phone.....anyone know why it's scary to me?

I practise over and over how I'm going to open the conversation - I try to prepare the words before I pick up the receiver.