Not in a good space

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

It's like a feeling just bubbling up to the surface. It's panicky and disgusting and I dont' know what to do with it. There's no thoughts associated with it. It's a feeling. A really gross one. I called the Suicide Call Back service. I didn't find them helpful. What do you do? What helps you?

[Hanna3]

Hello Katy! I am not often on BB in the mornings but I happen to be now and saw your message. Well done for getting to Uni and to yoga! I'll write more later tonight but just wanted to send a hello which you might get if you're working online. I hope you go OK this afternoon and I'll chat later on. Sending hugs!

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy, hope you made it today to Uni. I have a friend who moved to bear nearer to her son and his family - she moved to another state - and now she says she hardly ever sees them. So I always warn people about moving to be closer to family! Glad your son keeps in touch on the phone I think it is a young man thing too..

I'm tired tonight so just a quick hello and hope you went OK. I'll check in tomorrow, hang in there xoxoxo

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy, Glad you and that other student who is struggling with CFS have got to know each other - you'll understand how each other are struggling with the prac - and it's nice she's helping you a bit too. Hope it goes well this week and that you're having a nice weekend break. xooxo

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hi Hanna

Yes, I'm feeling blessed to have her there. She's really lovely, and will make an amazing social worker.

My weekend is ok, but just feeling super lonely again. I'm writing an assignment at the moment, and then might go browse the shops just to get out from between my four walls and be around people. We're supposed to get a whole lot of rain today and I can hear the wind building already so won't be getting out with Stormy today, I don't think.

I wonder what you and Sam are up to, and whether your weather is pleasant. Thanks for popping in xoxo

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy,

Sorry I haven't been around here today - I hope you got outside it's better to be around people I find.. lonely here too, yesterday was a lovely afternoon and we sat outdoors listening to a performer playing guitar outdoors in the park which was lovely, lots of people sitting around enjoying the sunshine and music..today rather lonely, did housework and took Sam for a walk this afternoon. I hope tomorrow goes well for you, pats to Storm, sending hugs xoxoxo

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy, I hope today went OK at your prac. Just popping by to see how you're going, I hope you're OK and were nice and rested after a good weekend, hope you did something nice to treat yourself. Furry hugs xoxoxo

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy,

Just wondering how you're doing, haven't heard from you in a while. I hope you are OK. xoxoxo

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hello

I feel like all I do is whinge, so I haven't come on here. But I'm just so unhappy and can't work out what to do about it. Uni is just a week of stress and then weekends are lonely. Not sure what's worse really. I've kept myself super busy to pass the time, but it makes me wonder what the point is. I'm trying to pass the time to get to Monday, but then I don't want to be there either. I've just walked around the block to try and shoosh my mind, but I can't walk fast enough to get away from myself. I wish I were a dog and my only worry was not getting my dinner at exactly 5pm! Storm is happily sleeping next to me, with not a care in the world.

What is the point? I know no-one can help me but me and I can't. I'm tired.

[Sophie_M]

Hey Katy,

Thanks for keeping your friends on the forums updated on how you've been feeling. We're really sorry to hear that you're feeling lonely and tired. We can can hear that the stress from uni on top of all of this must be really tough to cope with, but please know our community is here to help support you through this tough time.

Please also know that the friendly counsellors at our Support Service (1300 22 4636) as well as our friends at Lifeline (13 11 14) are here for you 24/7 if you're wanting a little bit of extra support tonight. 

We hope you always feel free to post however you are feeling here- this is a safe space, free of judgement and we're all here for you.

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy!

It's good to see you back here! Sounds like we are both having a c..p time lately - pity we can't get together and have a cuppa and a good chat... but anyway here I am, little Sam is curled up beside me... Lonely today here too...

So what's happening with the Uni prac? Is that other woman still being friendly/helpful? Is it that it's generally stressful? I get lonely, that's been my day here for sure... more lonely days ahead. Oh heck.

So I'll come by again later and see if you've replied.. I'm wishing I hadn't moved, am darn lonely and don't know how to cope with this house etc etc - yep I'm whinging too... so whinge away, we can whinge together... how many more weeks of Uni prac to go? What is the main worry with your prac for you? Anxiety generally? Something more specific?

Fluffy hugs from the east state to the west.. I hope you write back... xoxoxo