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[Fiasco]

I think I'm going crazy. Can someone please help me?

[Fiasco]

Hi Mary!

im sorry I haven't had a chance to read through any threads or anything so I am not sure of what's been happening. I hope you're well?

my grandfather is dying. We found out on Father's Day when he went to hospital. Constant strokes and TIAs. Just waiting and waiting. My dad flew up on Wednesday (it's his dad). My grandad is 93. Good long life but still so hard. He's in cairns. We're in brisbane. I wanted to fly up with my dad, but I decidedh daughters need me here more. And who knows how long I'd be there for? He could last another day, or another week. And then to wait for funeral. So we'll all fly up together. Except they don't offer bereavement flights or anything anymore and we stupidly spent our money on home project and now will have to redraw on home loan. Been very silly.

and I believe that misss 6 and I will miss the state competitions for dance that are on next weekend that our teams have been preparing for all year. And we will let them all down. I let my coach know it was a possibility straight away but at rehearsal nothing had changed. I honestly don't see how they can go on without me. And if we actually are here for the comps, I am going to be crap as I just don't care anymore and haven't practised or kept up with the changes in choreography.

We've all been sick for weeks with cold/flu, so feeling bad, having little sleep and dealing with bad behaviour of kids.

im having a big pity party.

just tired and stressed and sad and overwhelmed and over it all.

[White_Rose]

Dear Fi

I am so sorry you are facing this loss. It's always hard no matter how much you think you are prepared. As you say 93 is grand age to reach and he would have lived through many changes in Australia. Even though he now lives in Cairns the bond is still unbroken and that will still be the case when passes away. He will live on in your memory.

When my mom died she was in England and I was in Australia. I wanted to go to her funeral, in fact I wished my family had told me earlier she was fading so I could say my goodbye. It is a great regret of mine and one that was almost greater because I thought I could not get to the UK in time. It was Christmas and even funerals are put on hold for the week so I went and my daughters came as well. Good job as I had no idea what I was doing.

I don't know how close you are to your grandfather but I feel there is a close bond. Let me remind of this bond. You have one chance of seeing him and making your farewell before he passes away. If you can get yourself there you will be doing yourself a favour and saving a life time of regret. You said you think you will not be an asset in the competition so why not go. Loyalty to your dance group is great but family always come first and they will understand.

Perhaps the whole family can go as school holidays have started I believe. Or let dad look after them. He must be aware of your distress. My sister-in-law said all these things to me. I knew it was best to go so I went into work and organised my leave and flew off to say goodbye as best I could.

If your coach knows you are going he can make changes to the routine to cover you. Is a dance comp more important than saying goodbye to your grandfather. I would have no hesitation in leaving immediately if I thought I could have seen my mom before she died. It has always been a deep grief for me even though there was no way I could know. Please rethink your priorities.

I had to borrow my air fare from my husband but I knew it was too important not to go. You are not having a pity party, you are faced with a dilemma and you are unsure what to do. Go with your heart, let dad take Miss 6 to the comp. I'm sure another mom will help her dress etc and you can organise this before you go.

I've had my say and I'm almost out of word allowance. Sending you a hug.

Mary

[Guest_3712]

Hey my dear Fi

Miss u heaps and sorry things are so bad for you ATM

Im away but just wanted to let u know I'm thinking of you - saw Dirty Dancing promo the other day and thought about you 💃🏿

Take care

Stressless