Feeling desperate to make this stop

[Lilly99]

Hi there, this is my first post which is really scary. Anyway I am not good feeling really depressed and anxious . I have tried everything psychiatrists, psychologists. Mental health nurses. Medication , I even spent 4 weeks in mental hospital to have tms which obviously didn’t work . Anyway feeling like life isn’t worth living . I feel like I have had enough of this battle called life . No matter what I try nothing works . I couldn’t be more of a joke and a waste of space really what’s the point I am never going it get better . Do people ever truly get better?

[Lilly99]

Hi Jojo ,

Thankyou . But I am not good , feeling overwhelmed and out of control very emotional tonight .

How can I keep going it’s not going to change . There isn’t hope of getting better. It’s not possible . I don’t want this life anymore.

I have given up . And can’t do this anymore . I won’t do it anymore.

I wish things could be different . It is what it is

There isn’t any point

Lilly

[Jojo100]

Hi Lilly

I am sorry to hear you are not feeling good & also feeling emotional and overwhelmed. Is your family aware you are feeling like this? Surely they must notice what you are going through? Is there anything they can do to help?

Meantime is there something you can do to distract yourself from the negative thoughts you are having? I play games on my iPad or phone which really helps or go for a walk. Do you have any hobbies to take your mind off things? Watching DVDs or TV can also help switch your mind off for a while too.

Have you given any thought to trying the public mental health system? It might seem a bit scary, but without them I wouldn’t still be here. They saved my life and helped me to be able to cope again.

Kind thoughts xox

Jojo

[Lilly99]

Hi ,

Sorry for posting again . I am trying to get through each day but I am really struggling .

I can’t stop these suicidal thoughts. I am consumed by this feeling that I am never going to get better .

I have a lot of problems and I can’t see a way out .

When do you say enough is enough I am not going to do this anymore . Surely no one expects me to keep going feeling this bad .

Its such a battle I can’t take anymore

I know how selfish this may seem but I can’t do this anymore .

Lilly

[Sophie_M]

Hi Lilly99, 

We're writing as we are concerned about you and want to let you know that our Support Service have sent you an email wanting to get in touch.

It's great that you have come to our safe and supportive community and we are so grateful that you have. The communtiy are here for you, please know that things can get better. 

We would strongly recommend giving our wonderful friends at Lifeline a call - 13 11 14, they can talk to you and help you through difficult moments. 

Keep reaching out to us and letting us know how you are when you feel up to it. 

[Jojo100]

Hello Lilly hope you are feeling less overwhelmed tonight. Were you able to talk to your family about how things are with you?

Best wishes xox

Jojo

[Jojo100]

Dear Lilly you don’t have to apologise for posting. I am glad you do as I worry about you and care how you are. I hope you continue to keep in touch as I see you as someone hurting and needing a friend.

You are stronger than I as I couldn’t have kept going like you with no support. I know you said you weren’t going back to your GP, but I still think it would be worthwhile even just to have someone to offload to and share how you are feeling.

As always take care & stay strong xox

Jojo

[Lilly99]

Hi ,

I haven’t spoken to my family because I can’t .

The thing is there is too much to fix . There isn’t a way out . I can’t talk to anyone about my problems because there isn’t anyway to fix them .

How can I keep going ? I am a waste of space

I am such a failure . I am a nobody

Lilly

[Sophie_M]

Dear Lilly99

We are sorry to hear how difficult things have been for you lately.

Please know that we are concerned about your wellbeing and that our Support Services have been trying to get in touch with you via email. We’d ask if you could please respond to them and provide your phone number, so we can check in with you and ensure that you have a plan in place to keep yourself safe from acting on your thoughts of suicide.

If you feel unable to keep yourself from acting on your thoughts about suicide or self-harm this is an emergency and you need to call 000 (triple zero). We would also strongly recommend giving our wonderful friends at Lifeline a call - 13 11 14, they can talk to you and help you through difficult moments.

We’d also encourage you to let us know how the community can support you in moving forward. Keep checking back in and let us know how you are going when you feel up to it. 

[Jojo100]

Dear Lilly

I am sorry you can’t talk to your family about your problems. You are not a waste of space or a nobody. You are a somebody to me and I will never give up on you.

I just wish you would ring life line or one of the other help lines instead of suffering all by yourself. You only have to share what you are comfortable with.

Sometimes problems seem too hard to solve, but with the opinion and support of an objective person that can often turn around. It is a process that takes time and courage, but can allow healing to begin.

I wish healing for you Lilly xox

Jojo

[blondguy]

Hi Lilly99

Just saying hello. It took me 3 months to get the courage to create my own thread topic back in 2016 as I didnt have the confidence/courage like you have...Probably too much anxiety and depression for me at the time I guess but better now

I see that Jojo has been here which is great...and Sophie as well! I am sorry that you have been going through such a awfully rough time Lilly

Do you have a couple of friends/people that can help provide support for you?

Im sorry that I am a latecomer to your thread....If there is anything we can do please ask whatever you want Lilly

you are not alone Lilly....seriously...

Thank-you for being a part of the Beyond Blue Family too Lilly

my kind thoughts for you

Paul