Alone..Depressed..Sad..

[Ggrand]

Hi..I'm new here..just need to put my feeling down..no one to talk to makes depression and anxiety so hard...the last 4 days I have either been in bed crying or on the lounge crying..I can't seem to get out of this...I am becoming a prisioner in my own home as its getting progressively difficult to go out.. I have to go out Tuesdays so I do everthing on that day but it's like I'm holding my breathe all day until I get back to the safety of my home then I can let go and that starts the cycle again of spending the next 6 days at home either in bed or on the lounge sad and depressed...I really feel like just giving up.. My husband passed away 4 years on This coming Thursday. My children live 6 hours drive away and have small children so I don't see them that much.Bad mum and grandmum I am on there last visit i was pleased to see them but I just wanted them to go home. I feel so aweful and numb atm..

[Big_black_dog_is_roaming_]

Hi Grandy

I hope you don’t mind me joining but I’m new. I’ve been reading all of your posts and want to say thank you, without you knowing it your honesty and openness has helped me.

I also wanted to know how are you today?

Anniversaries are excruciating! So very proud of you for reaching out and letting others in and after all of the pain you have suffered.

Thank you all of you, to read your posts made me feel less alone because it is what my life is like, I thought I was the only one who felt like this. When you look out the window everyone seems so normal.

I really hope that your new medication can bring you just a little relief. You are kind and gentle and I hope that you are okay.

[Guest8901]

Dear Grandy,

I am thinking of you today, and hoping you are okay. Please dont go quiet and retreat, as I know you find it helpful to be here and to help others, which you are so good at. Here for you.

Big Black Dog is Roaming Free - What a lovely post from you. I would love to welcome you to this caring and supportive community. You epitomise what Beyondblue forums are all about - supporting others and providing an understanding and caring environment where we can all talk openly and honestly. A very big welcome to you. I will keep a look out for any new introductory threads from you. Otherwise, please continue to respond to existing threads as you have done here. Your input will be most welcome and appreciated. I'm so glad to hear that reading this thread of Grandy's has been helpful to you. And yes, anniversaries are the absolute pits! And no, you are certainly not alone in the way you feel, there are many of us here who feel similar or the same. Again, I welcome you here, and hope to see you around some more.

Amanda

[Ggrand]

Hell,

Is anyone away?

[Birdy77]

Are you ok Grandy? I am awake xo

[Ggrand]

Birdy, hello..

Spent part last night and today in hospital...To much on my mind..can't sleep..

[Ggrand]

So very pleased to hear from friends here...to many strangers I'm not comfortable with...

thank you very very much Birdy..

[Birdy77]

Dear Grandy

I am glad to hear you are safe in hospital.

Sometimes it's needed, just to survive isn't it?

Hard to sleep at the best of times hey, harder when you're away from home.

How are you feeling?

[Birdy77]

You're welcome dear Grandy

It can feel overwhelming being around people you don't know and who don't know you.

[Ggrand]

I'm fine..I shouldn't be here...I want to go home..hospitals reminds to to much of really bad and sad times...

[Ggrand]

Yes..I tried to go home. They wouldn't let me...My dogs are home alone...they never been alone before..