Dealing with loss

Guest_11230380
Community Member

Recently I lost my Grandma, I understand how this happens and as she was suffering it was for the better, but since then, it has felt like all good things and happy emotions are overshadowed by an overwhelming nothingness. So now I feel only sadness or just nothing at all. It hasn’t been long, but I already feel it taking over, and I just want to be back to my normal self, is this to be expected or should I do some reflecting?

1 Reply 1

white knight
Community Champion

Hi, welcome

 

I'm sorry to hear that news.

 

Grief is a process different for everyone. Some people take years to recover and the worst thing someone can say is "get over it". In 2021 my wife and I lost 9 close people- her parents within 4 days of each other, 3 school friends, my wifes step dad and friends. It was a really bad year but luckily I had gone through grief before when my beautiful dad passed away in 1992 at only 64yo. 

 

A few points to remember-

 

  • Dont rush grief. Grief allows you to do all the reflecting you need unless you have a mutual friend or family member that you'd like to share your memories with which is a good idea
  • Plant a bush or tree in her honour, even a red rose bush. Watch it bloom
  • Make an album
  • Write a story or in my case a poem (I'll put one of mine on the end of this post)
  • Comfort others grieving too, that way its shared. Ask others close to her if they are ok. This often results in them contacting you too or at least getting closer to you.
  • Model your attitude and care for others based on her approach, her character.

Rest assured this grief will slow up eventually. Death is part of life which is a contradiction but its true. As it drift away always remember you times together.

 

You sound like a wonderful grandchild to your Grandma

 

DAD’S SMILE

 

An old porch chair where my dad once sat

A smoke in his hand and slippers on a mat

I remember when he’d laugh and smile at me

And I’d return the honor almost instantly

 

My thoughts are such now that dad has passed away

I glance at that empty chair each and every day

Sorrow fills my heart and in a way it’s sad

That I still look at that chair and still smile at my dad

 

But all’s not lost and I don’t waste my time

Cause I still see his face smiling just like mine

Yes in that old porch chair where my dad once sat

Is his smoke in his hands and slippers on a mat….

 

 

TonyWK