Would really appreciate peoples thoughts on a housing situation !

[randomxx]

Hi to all.

lt's an unbelievable time in life to find myself stuck in this position, just don't know how to look at it, or what to do about with it, if l can anything at all. 

Problem is, at almost 60, yeah l've mixed up details in other threads just a bit concerned some l know may also be here and haven't wanted any connection here that l might know, butttt, yep.

Thing is l didn't get anything out of my last house, the people l went into the property with as it was a big place, went broke.

Well , sort of lucky although maybe a curse , not sure anymore but l do still have a 1ac country property, 18yrs now, from back when l was married.

l can't work anymore for mh reasons but if l took care l can survive until l can get the pension- living at the 1ac place- it only has a small over nighter atm but l could extend and it'd come up quite nice .

Problem is, it's in a ting town, 30mins to the main town which is a really nice place and there's also a couple of tiny ones in between before that main buttttt, out where this place is, is tiny and out on it's own .

l always planned selling it about now but problems are now that for 1, even if it did sell, it's just a cheap little country block it'd only be a good deposit on something closer in- but circumstances now that'd mean a new mortgage and l'd have to keep working too, don't think l could stomach either of those especially the stress in trying to make it happen.

2nd thing highly possible it doesn't even sell anyway.

l know l'm lucky to at least have it and all , with the housing crisis and so many in worser positions , l just never dreamed l'd be living on it though and honestly, just don't know but it looks like l might be forced to.

l grew up in the city and have lived in some of the nicest places in the country but to have to settle on this place out there now- look the property itself is a really cute block and in a nice little back street- if l could put it on a truck to somewhere else it'd be really nice - but this town.

rx

[white knight]

Rx , Er

6 years ago we moved from a town of 250 people. Generally store, golf club, primary school. A friend i use to fly model planes with died aged 84. His wife stayed in their house on one acre. She learned to drive the ride on mower, split delivered wood and barely survived. 

But that was the norm for the elderly in that town 20 mins from a bigger town one hour from a city of 60,000.

Whereas my wife and I in our 60's planned ahead and built our house in a town with all facilities pop 3500. Fast forward say 20 years if I pass at 90yo my wife already has good friends, voluntary work, aged care, supermarket, bingo etc etc. 

So many people remain in the house they cant emotionally leave, sad really. 

I was thinking about your dilemma. If you were to put your house on the market at an elevated price and it did sell, could you stay in a caravan park for a few months until you decided the next step, unit, reno house....?

TonyWK 

[randomxx]

Thx a lot for that Tony, always love hearing of your experiences bc you've never been the norm and l really relate.

l suppose it's sad that they stay, ldk really, maybe they're happier my ex's nan did similar, tiny town, she'd never leave their house and she didn't.

B told me a bout an older man here to, poor fellas lived through 2 wives and his still here on his own. Met a framer 87 still working his 400ac farm, toned it right back but still rode his motor bike over it every day, hoed his 1ac veggie plot by hand, Asked why he doesn't use the tractor said it's great therapy ha ha. He just loved the life , good for him right.He'd been offered millions for his farm.

Broke down once met another one similar 85 still working his farm. 

1st option for me here, just stay and build a beautiful little property, always have something to do, maybe life turns here takes a happy form, ld know. it sure would financially that's for sure l'd be set, damn.

My main thing about this place is it's so far from anything. The drivings already on my nerves, if only it had at least a few shops here, nearest basic is 25k, another 34k, main 55k. l'd kill for a 24/7 ha ha.

Thanks a lot for the ideas Tony, yeah option b l spose hey. That'd be an idea if l didn't stay. lf l could sell it off l'd be happy in a free camp for awhile actually, love those, take my time looking, no pressure. lt'd have to be a bargain though tell you what,unless it's just another spot like this but not much point in that, ldk. Could prob find something though in a better situation. Have been browsing, l think something would turn up. Did find one new one browsing so far actually, 12 mins out of a good size town, had a 24/7 5mins up the road to ha ha, now we're talking.  😁

Wouldn't mind that one and could manage it financially. Never know it might still be around if l could sell this. lf not something similar.

rx

[randomxx]

How u doin er . 

Just wanted to mention been seeing a lot of stuff about Perth property crashing , even though it's crazy atm l know.

They reckon a lot of the mining companies are closing. Actually come to think of it the mining might've been for other area's but there's 7cities they expect to crash though anyway because of mining and other industries , forget what Perths was but they reckon that'll be crashing too. Cairns was tourism crashing it.

So, never know l know your not fussed right now but hey that might pay off and you wake up one morning down the track to a nice surprise price wise.

Take care, hope your doin ok.

rx 

[Eagle Ray]

Hi rx,

Thank you, I'm doing ok. Thanks about the info on Perth property. I had not heard about the property crashing. I'll keep an eye on it. The Perth median price had actually gone above Melbourne. There is still much more availability in Melbourne. I still have no idea where I'll end up, so at the moment I realise I have to go slow and focus on my mental and physical health first before I can even really figure out where I might move.

At this point, everything is so insecure in the world that it feels sensible not to rush decisions. The petrol prices are high which is also something to think about in terms of being anywhere that requires travel, at least at the moment. I've hardly left my town this year actually. I think I've only been to the next larger town maybe 5 times this year, which is less than usual for me. I have been to Perth twice this year. I really have no idea where home is for me, and I know you are feeling that confusion too. I think sometimes we have to wait a bit while also exploring possibilities. I feel eventually I will have to make a decision and go with it though. A lack of people contact and sense of community is the biggest issue for me here.

I'm trying to think of what I want in the coming years and then see how I can work towards that. I think if I really can't see my own needs being met here within a certain timeframe, then I really do have to move to a much larger place with more opportunities. You never know, prices could come down eventually and increase both of our options.

If I could easily get out of here on a regular basis then I could possibly stay here, but I am a little remote and it does mean a fair bit of driving and I know you mention that being a thing for you too. It costs to keep travelling all the time too. I'm on an increasingly tight budget so I can't just go off whenever I want to. That's a motivation for me to sell this place too, and then look at something extra small and easy to look after like a small unit, but located in a bigger place.

Ah well, we will get there rx, wherever "there" is. It's good you are keeping an eye on the options available out there and I really hope you see something you like in a location you like.

Take care and hope you're doing ok too,

er

[randomxx]

Hiya er.

l'm up on the Murray again atm takin a break. it's been hot as but thankfully cooling off in a few days. l'll prob head back in a few wks just encase petrol rations kick in.

But yeah, l know and don't feel you have to go into it atm well, unless you feel like it. Yep l've seen all the stuff on Perth prices my God isn't it insane.  l think the crashing thing they're talking over the next yr or 2 , not right now buttt, who knows l know.

Just wondering, how far's that town over from you that you like going to?

But alas, l'm in about the same frame as you right now or something like maybe worse and l made myself sick looking at that block l found, literally felt sick even just mentioning it here. The thought of another place and selling mine and going through it all again, it makes me sick, sick to the stomach.  l'm not up to it and l can;'t go through it again.

l've had to push so hard at many times through life but l can't and l don;t want to any more.

One thing l've felt like just excepting since l've been away, enough already, can't do it.

Sooo, my latest is to hell with it all might go back build the place l've designed and just stay put and to hell with it. Work on the property keep me busy. Go upt to the main or out and about for breaks. Met a few good people there already actually too so it's out done 9yrs at my old town in that regard in just a few mths, isn't that weird soooo, never know right.

Latest thought though is iffff, down the track l didn't wanna stay don't think l'll even bother buying another place. Maybe just go rent a unit or something l'm thinking.

And when the pension comes around they pay part of your rent anyway so that'd make a huge difference too.

Sooooo anyway, who knows but atm that's something like what l'm thinking.

l;ve had about 5 people vote on just going with it too which is a bit of a  classic. l haven;'t asked or anything but they know l'm in limbo and have just said things like man , nice place, all free, just build there. Ha, they're probably got more brains than me.

Big hug er.

rx

[randomxx]

Ps , just on your thing to er , buttt, you never know. Your going with yourself atm and that's a really good thing, your not forcing anything.

Kinda makes me feel like you just never do know. Maybe something falls into shape for you there, couple of good friends or prices come down in a yr or 2 or who knows what.

But don;t worry for now, just do what you do.

rx

[Eagle Ray]

I'm really glad you are up on the Murray. It's so good to get away for a break. I'd really like a short break somewhere in April, but keeping an eye on the petrol situation too which will potentially limit where I go.

The town I was mentioning is only half an hour's drive from here. It's somewhere I would say I don't necessarily love to visit, but it has more going on than here and is much busier. I do grocery shopping there when I can as the supermarket here frequently runs out of stock and is very limited.

With regard to you feeling sick to the stomach about the idea of starting over somewhere new, I think it is really good to listen to that. I think the body speaks to us, and if something really feels overwhelming and has such a powerful effect on the body, it's probably a sign our system just isn't up to dealing with that thing, at least for now. I recently had the uni I was at contact me to finish studies I had been doing. I was caring for both my parents prior to their deaths, my brother going through a breakdown and dealing with my own health issues at the time. I was unable to complete the study. It was nice of the uni to contact me to try to complete it now as I thought I wouldn't get another chance, but when I tried to orient to doing it, I was just sick to the stomach like you. It literally really messed with me to the point I realised it wasn't even healthy for me to go there. I needed to let it go, and when I did, I felt so much better. I just accepted that chapter of my life is over, and it was a relief actually. So I do think listening to what is the most healthy for us, mentally and physically, is really important. I completely hear you about the having to push hard so many times in life, and there are only so many times you can keep doing that. I really feel that too and I just want a peaceful and simple life now. I think that's really ok.

I think the option of renting a unit in the future is a valid thing to consider. If prices do come down, buying a unit in the future may be possible too. You can just stick with your current place as long as it feels right, do some work on it, build something if you would like and make a home there. But you know it's not necessarily your forever place and there are still future options.

Yes, it may be that something falls into place here. If I did finally find more human connection that would make a huge difference. At the moment I feel like all my energy goes to just getting through the day - getting food to eat, cooking food, do dishes, crash into bed. I'm sleeping a fair bit in the day too from exhaustion. I'm often awake at night due to trauma flashback issues and my brain is intensely processing stuff that's outside my conscious control. I feel at the mercy of all that but I do know my system is trying to heal and working towards it. I would like to get to the point of doing some volunteer work in an area I really love. I think there could be some good options in this region I live in, I just feel like an unreliable worker at the moment with my health. But I have a lot of ideas of things I could do and I can feel inklings of hope that I'm going to get there and be able to do some of those things.

One thing about this general region now is we have a regional airport that flies over east now. It's much easier than going to Perth to get anywhere. It only flies to Melbourne and Sydney at the moment. I've kind of run out of money to take plane flights out to Melbourne like before, but I would like to try to make a bit of income somehow that gave me the occasional flexibility to do that and visit some more places in Australia. That's more a longer term goal, but it would make me feel less isolated than being stuck in my regional area for years to come. It's an alternative to trying to move over east. I think I'm a nomad at heart.

Anyway, good to chat with you rx and thanks so much for the hug and big hug to you too 🤗

[randomxx]

Thx for that er .

But yeah you see, l'm so glad you didn't follow through the uni thing then. For now, that would be wayyyy too much for you on top of everything else then and as you say, even our bodies have told us both no iffs or buts , the same thing loud and clear so.

l really like your thoughts though on just staying put atm to , going easy on yourself even apart from the fact your not up to more anyway but yaknow you've got some great ideas there though to yaknow er when your ready. Things like that could make a massive difference and you know and who knows. 

l'm gonna have to come back, my dyslexias kicking in l'm tired.

Really nice talking to you to though er.

Thx for hug.

rx

[randomxx]

Simplicity and minimal is something l've hugely craved too about 3-4yrs now.

No regrets leaving my old house although it was a very simple life and vibe, it was also huge and a tone of work. l only wanted a 1/4 of that, even less. So l very much hear you there but also in life itself to. l'd felt so overload from this world and life and work and all that pushing too.

One thing l really love about my design if l built on the block here.lt's exactly what l wanted and life there would be too in most ways even if a bit further out and quieter surrounds than l'd prefer buttttt, once again dads words ring true, never get perfect in life.

Love your regional airport too. We had one as well and god it was so damn nice and a real to use as compared to Melb airport, and soooo much simpler . Gf ex did all her coming and going from that one mainly. We could get her tickets from Sydney for the cost of about 1/3 a tank of diesel in my car and my car use to use two tanks to drive up or back from Sydney. Plus food and munchies l'd blow 350 every trip one way, we'd get her tickets 45bucks, pretty amazing hey. But eh yaknow too, just for later when your up to something and able, just sayin.

l know there's trauma but are you depressed too , to me they're separate effects? lt's just that depression really drains us of everything a lot like you describe. Can any meds help in whatever it is anyway ?

Def ' no pushing for er though and l know god almighty just getting through the day , fed and bathed and to beed again is sometimes all we can muster, l've had so much of that myself to last few yrs. One thing l love about vanning, that's all you have to do if it's all you feel like doing and eh, we deserve that in life for a bit right.

l feel like l'll be needing and electric prod to actually get moving at building if l do but bc it'd mean just staying put that'll more than compensate bc it'd only be about 1/10th of what l'd have to do if l sold and restarted - there's that sickly feeling again right there. No thanks, not doing it l refuse for once in my life, l'm sayin NO.

Anyway, really like your ideas er , that's the spirit and no pressure but just when you feel inclined, l reckon any of all that sorta stuff could change things a lot. Funny you know, when l talk about my old town it's not like everyone else was all miserable and depressed, most of them were pretty  perky and happy really. My stuff was more a me thing than them.

Anywayyyy, you look after yourself and go easy or er to eh.

rx

Wave to Tony.

[Eagle Ray]

I reckon being able to design your place exactly how you want is definitely a plus. There would be something really rewarding about that and you often see people who've done something like that, and they seem truly content. I sometimes watch Gardening Australia and you see it with people who've designed their own garden to really fit in with their house or property, and they just seem like they are living the dream. So having that autonomy is definitely a positive.

Yes, regional airports are great. So much simpler! I can park at this one and walk into the terminal in under 5 minutes. Then it was straight forward as anything getting on the plane. It was a whole different story with the airport parking at Perth that created all sorts of dramas after the one I booked into was closed when I got there. Then total shenanigans trying to get the right shuttle bus to the terminal. Thought I was going to miss my plane 🙈 I would rather travel from the regional airport any day. That's fantastic your gf only had to pay $45. So much easier. Being all the way over in WA, flights tend to cost a lot more, but that's just the deal of being over here.

Yes, I am depressed too. I think trauma is the original source of that, but then a bunch of other things on top of that as well. I'm having huge issues with histamine intolerance because of a condition called Mast Cell Activation Syndrome (MCAS). Most days it is hard for me to keep food down and I have to eat a low histamine diet. I'm taking multiple medications to try to control that. Unfortunately many standard antidepressants can make it worse. I found one that looked promising, but that one can cause quick liver injury in some people, and I have an autoimmune liver disease already. So I'm scared to take that one and I feel totally stuck at the moment. Today was really bad actually. I called Lifeline and got a good guy on there. I'm slightly better at the moment.

I love the whole vanning idea and its simplicity. I've recently watched a few videos of people living out of their vans and one young woman was even living out of her 4WD. They all seem super content and happy. Something changes when I am travelling. I only have a little old hatchback car too. It's 26 years old now and still going. But it drives well and something just increasingly improves when I am out on the road. As I type that, I think how it may be good for you too staying at the current property which seems maybe a better option financially and then travelling out from there in the van. So you are still getting about and not trapped there, but it's a secure base to come home to.

I think it's very ok to say NO to what doesn't feel right. I'm gradually finally learning in my life to do that. For too long I did what I thought I was supposed to do or expected to do. I wasn't listening in to myself carefully enough.

It's good at least the people in your old town were perky and happy. My town is so strange. A lot of people here do a kind of fake happy, but when you learn more about them you find they are really depressed. But it's absolutely not acceptable to speak about depression or anything like that. It's a bit like going back decades in time. It's a conservative place with a lot of retired farmers. It was so great when I caught up with a couple of friends in Perth and we had a real conversation where we could talk about our lives and feelings in a real way. It was a breath of fresh air. Do anything like that here and you will be totally shunned. So I remain pretty reclusive here. I do have the occasional real chat with someone though, and they are usually someone like me who largely keeps to themselves most of the time.

You look after yourself too. And wave to Tony too if reading.

Sleep well!

er