I've spent this whole year getting back on my feet and enjoying a slow paced romance. In the last few months I've gotten a new job, a car and grown even closer to my friend/lover.
I suffer from depression and anxiety, I do not receive medical attention and I'm not currently getting any therapy... I've said to myself many times to do so, but like most tasks it seems so hard to do.
Mostly things have been getting better and it has been great to connect with someone I feel really understand and respects me...
My friend/lover started with one bad day that seemed like a week. After a couple days of no contact which isn't normal, I reached out and asked how I could help... He asked me to forget about him. That he was depressed and hated himself. That he was gonna get help, but that asking me to forget him was harder than he could ever explain...
I offered to give him space but revised to simply forget about him.
I know that I have no control in this situation, but it has triggered every negative feeling in my while body. I'm a mother, a usually strong person, but I just feel so repeatedly rejected. This hurts even more because I've been so guarded and careful in this relationship and it was beautiful and felt very equally reciprocated... I don't know where to organize anything.
I feel a little better than crash, right back destroyed... I pray and pray... This can't be happening
