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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the chats on this Forum having been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Loula Just not affecting me anymore
  • replies: 2

To day is the day I'm dreading. Today is the day I stuff up my husbands life. Last year he was offered a job at our church and was going to become a youth pastor. Instead today they will be announcing to the church that he will be stepping back for 6... View more

To day is the day I'm dreading. Today is the day I stuff up my husbands life. Last year he was offered a job at our church and was going to become a youth pastor. Instead today they will be announcing to the church that he will be stepping back for 6 months. Why you ask? Because I spoilt everything by being depressed. I went to therapy before I got married started taking medication that I had a positive reaction to for quiet a while and wanted to be the healthy supportive wife that could do anything. Now I'm the wife that stuffs up everything. I'm the one that has stopped his dreams. I'm the one that has made him go to therapy because he does not know how to deal with me. I'm the reason people are talking. I'm the failure in the marriage. I'm the one that keeps him up 24-7 because he so scared of what I might do! I'm the one with the issues but he's the one that has to suffer. And I feel so guilty about it. But I feel most guilty about is that I'm not going to sit beside him and support him at church today when the senior pastor announces this because I'm to ashamed and scared! I'm not a nice person and I think my darkest thoughts are really truebeyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

captain_nervous It's finally Happened
  • replies: 2

I'm new here and just wanted to tell my story. I was diagnosed with depression in my late teens. I had difficulty maintaining any treatment regime and pretty much led a messy existence using illicit drugs, taking a lot of risks and bouncing from one ... View more

I'm new here and just wanted to tell my story. I was diagnosed with depression in my late teens. I had difficulty maintaining any treatment regime and pretty much led a messy existence using illicit drugs, taking a lot of risks and bouncing from one disaster or job to another. In my mid twenties I met a girl and finally got help. The help was antidepressants which I feel have been holding me back from the brink for the past ten years, but for some reason I never had the strength to tackle my depression head on. I somehow managed to stay married and have a good job but all my energy went to hiding my illness from anyone but closest family, keeping my job and finding new excuses for sick leave and odd behaviour and not breaking down. My family were my only friends, I had no social life to speak of and I lived in constant fear and anxiety. All of that was before my daughter was born. She has significant disabilities. Shortly after she was born (three years ago) three of my family members died in an accident. Since that time my anxiety and depression have gone into overdrive. I have kept working though, and drinking (a lot) more, and eating more and I am in a black hole, worse than when I wasn't taking AD's. So it finally happened, I broke down at work. Had a total meltdown. I haven't been back for two weeks and I am having anxiety attacks every hour. I think I may have finally hit rock bottom and I don't see a way out. Doc has increased my meds and I am seeing a psych as regularly as I can afford...freaking out that it won't work.

Nene65 I'm over the black dog.
  • replies: 6

I'm 49 and have suffered from depression for as long as I can remember. I have finally realised what my triggers are...my children who are 30,28,26 & 18. They all know about my depression but do nothing to help me. Instead they push my buttons, treat... View more

I'm 49 and have suffered from depression for as long as I can remember. I have finally realised what my triggers are...my children who are 30,28,26 & 18. They all know about my depression but do nothing to help me. Instead they push my buttons, treat me badly and post nasty stuff on Facebook about me. I do not go on Facebook I hear this from other people. I've now come to conclusion that if I want to get better I have to cut ties with them to save myself. That's the hard part. Ant suggestions?

Redman827 I think I need help
  • replies: 6

Over the past few months I haven't been myself I find no enjoyment in anything I do anymore, I have been constantly angry at work and nearly every second day I find myself in the bathroom throwing up because of stress, lately I have having panic atta... View more

Over the past few months I haven't been myself I find no enjoyment in anything I do anymore, I have been constantly angry at work and nearly every second day I find myself in the bathroom throwing up because of stress, lately I have having panic attacks over tiny things and start crying for no reason im quite scared at the moment

Curls10 Telling my partner about my depression
  • replies: 5

I've never talked about my battles with depression over the years to many people. I might have mentioned it once or twice, but this ongoing battle has been my own to deal with. I've done well in the past to recover and stay positive. It takes a reocc... View more

I've never talked about my battles with depression over the years to many people. I might have mentioned it once or twice, but this ongoing battle has been my own to deal with. I've done well in the past to recover and stay positive. It takes a reoccurring negative experience to bring me down to this place. I'm 23 now and I've worked hard to maintain my positivity. For a year now, my partner and I have had difficulties to overcome certain issues that negatively impact our relationship. We've tried counselling to steer us in the right direction but it hasn't helped. Lately, it has been too much for me to handle anymore. I feel like I have reached my point and I can't take crying, fighting, making up or apologies anymore. My heart is sore. As much as we love each other, it's not enough. There have been times when we've argued that I want to just hurt myself again and I wish for things to end. I told him that I think of hurting myself and that our relationship needs to change now because it brings me so much pain that I don't want to deal with it anymore. I told him about my thoughts and it just made me feel ashamed and embarrassed of myself. Is it right for me to feel this way? I feel like if you tell your partner about something like this, it should help you feel like youre not alone? I just want him to help me, to support me, and to push me in the right direction like I had for him when he was at his lowest point. Sometimes your run out of steam when you try to be strong... And this is where I am now. I'm tired or trying to get to the place I want to be but not being able to reach it. I just want to know what to do. I'm so lost and I feel so alone in my own home. I just want someone to fight for me like I matter. beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

bastet I haven't a clue what's wrong
  • replies: 3

Like most people here, I'm new and have no clue what I'm doing. I guess I just need to vent/ask. I've been struggling with what I believe to be anxiety, depression, and possibly schizophrenia. I have multiple medical issues that I'm not going to both... View more

Like most people here, I'm new and have no clue what I'm doing. I guess I just need to vent/ask. I've been struggling with what I believe to be anxiety, depression, and possibly schizophrenia. I have multiple medical issues that I'm not going to bother listing since there are so many. I don't want anyone to feel like I'm just seeking attention from all of this. I get so scared that people will get annoyed with me if I talk about and it, and I'm just scared of what they'll think. Ever since I was little, I have been slightly suicidal and went to a psychologist every Tuesday. I was in 4th grade and I didn't even really understand what I was feeling, I just had a really hard time with death. My grandma and dog died and for a youngster that's mind bending. Jump to present day and I've felt horrid, both physically and mentally. I just now admitted to myself a few days ago in the mirror of what I might have, which hurt me. I'd all ways thought I was true but I didn't want to believe it. Whenever I read sad things, it's like there is another me who pushes to the front of my head (she's all ways been there) and amplifies my emotions ten fold and brings forward thoughts of loss of faith in humanity and suicide. I've all ways been a pretty dramatic kid and I talk a lot and whine a lot and am really dramatic but only sometimes. When I'm in a social situation, I'm a shell. noone believes me when I say I'm shy. I feel like I have nothing to define myself. People say (especially family) that I act like my friends which sometimes annoys me off because it's not true or throws me into a pit of dispare because it is. I want to be normal so bad. I'm running out of room so I'llend it here, but there is so much and I'm sure you dint want to listen to a whining 15 year old. If you happen to no what's wrong with me, please tell me.beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

Sparrow36 Don't no what to do
  • replies: 3

Hi I have ADHD, OCD,Bipolar and manic depprision I was doing really good then things started to go wrong my moods are everywhere and I have a lot of energy I was working but lost my job on Monday due to clashes with other staff and my mood swings I w... View more

Hi I have ADHD, OCD,Bipolar and manic depprision I was doing really good then things started to go wrong my moods are everywhere and I have a lot of energy I was working but lost my job on Monday due to clashes with other staff and my mood swings I was advised to resign so they didn't have to fire me. I am 39 and I thought I was doing good obviously I wasn't I have full support from my family I live alone with my dog. I am trying to stay positive but I am not doing well to be honest. Not sure what to do I have lost all motivation and feel I have let myself and my family down

Aly1987 depression/ anxiety merry-go-round
  • replies: 24

I'm new here, this is my 1st post. I'm really isolated because of my issues and have been for 2 yrs since I gave up a long term addiction to drugs and cut ties with the ppl I used with. I've suffered from depression, anxiety and borderline personalit... View more

I'm new here, this is my 1st post. I'm really isolated because of my issues and have been for 2 yrs since I gave up a long term addiction to drugs and cut ties with the ppl I used with. I've suffered from depression, anxiety and borderline personality disorder for yrs as well as ocd and anorexia. I thought that getting clean would solve all my problems and I'd b able to live a normal life, get a job ect and convinced myself that all my problems stemmed from drugs. So when I was hit with depression and anxiety and all the ocd thoughts slowly crept back in over the past few months and everything I worked for in recovery fell apart bit by bit as the mental illness took hold again I have been shattered by the realization that it wasn't the drugs causing mental illness but the mental illness causing me to feel the need to escape with drugs. Now I'm very concerned about my future, I can't stick to anything for long b4 I am stuck at home again, too anxious to go out. I don't think I'll ever hold down a job or live a meaningful life. Anyway I thought I'd try this website to reach out to others who might understand. Aly.

Dan1982 I think I need help!
  • replies: 7

I had mild depression years and years ago but came through it by changing my lifestyle and diet. Recently I have had a really hard time with work, family life and financial commitments. I am really struggling to make basic everyday decisions, I don't... View more

I had mild depression years and years ago but came through it by changing my lifestyle and diet. Recently I have had a really hard time with work, family life and financial commitments. I am really struggling to make basic everyday decisions, I don't sleep and when I do I don't want to get up when I wake. I'm constantly negative and always turn a good thing into bad as that's what I expect to happen so I feel like I'm preparing myself for the worst all the time. I am always hungry but when I eat I only want bad, fast food and after a few mouthfuls I tend to become nauscious and vomit! I have started to shake a bit, I sweat like mad constantly and have had quite a few red spots appear on my chest. I do not want to visit a doctor as it will show on my record and will jeopardise any future work prospects I want to do but it is getting quite scary as today I began to have suicidal thoughts. I quickly talked myself round but it has scared me so much that I could even think this that I am now asking for help on here. I have no idea what to do as I can not afford treatments or psychologists etc.any advice would be so gratefully received!!!

ShelbyC The Spiral
  • replies: 7

I want, nope, need to rant a little. I don't even know which category I fit in anymore but i'll post here in the depression section cause I guess that's where it all started and where it will probably all finish. I was diagnosed with "severe depressi... View more

I want, nope, need to rant a little. I don't even know which category I fit in anymore but i'll post here in the depression section cause I guess that's where it all started and where it will probably all finish. I was diagnosed with "severe depression" in high school at around the age of 14/15 since then I have been on all the usual anti-depression medications on and off till last year when i was told by a GP that I was misdiagnosed all those years ago ( I'm now 35 ) and what i actually have is Borderline Personality Disorder. I was also informed at that time that Anti-D's were not going to help what i need is constant psychotherapy. I've given up seeing doctors when i feel crappy because i expect the answer to always be the same - see a shrink. I really cant say that i have a horrible life situation. I'm not homeless, i have money, i have friends and i have a solid job. But no matter what, I always end up not being able to be satisfied. My situation at the moment is that: I live away from my wife and kids ( 2 step and one my own ) The eldest stepson ( 17 ) moved up here to live with me I moved away from all my friends to take this job ( which pays really well ) I ended up with a shoulder injury which required the use of over the counter pain killers ( containing codeine ). Now i seem to have developed an addiction to them that i cant seem to shake alone. I know its not even a serious drug like heroine, but for me the withdrawals are horrible and i keep giving in and getting back on them. Now i find myself once again, losing self esteem rapidly after repeated failures to shake the addiction all while dealing with the long distance relationship with my wife and the isolation of being without my friends. Before i left my home town, i was told by my shrink that this move was a really bad idea even if it fixes our money issues. I now believe her. I once wanted to be an advocate for beyond blue ( when i felt like i was beating the years of depression ) but now i find myself on the victim end of depression once again. I feel this wont be my last post here, its probably only just the start, but i needed to vent so maybe i can sleep now. Why is it that after 20 years I still cant shake depression when i feel like things are starting to work out.