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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Rangatira Anxiety then depression
  • replies: 5

Hey peeps first time post. i got anxiety from being different im quiet and don't like attention even positive.i was outgoing over driven with things that I would do eg.if I had some sort of vision I would make it happen full stop.in my mind I can do ... View more

Hey peeps first time post. i got anxiety from being different im quiet and don't like attention even positive.i was outgoing over driven with things that I would do eg.if I had some sort of vision I would make it happen full stop.in my mind I can do anything.im a builder/carpenter and also have built race cars.skate surf weekly.have been sponcerd in the past. I was hit by a lot of judgment to the point where I would get anxious.people(workers) would watch me work because of the pace and the enthusiasm I had.i watched them try to as they say get in people's heads(mindgames)I seen groups of people target people on these work sites.after putting up with this for years it slowly broke my confidence and I would get anxious at work.to the point where anxiety had set in solid.i left that job any was hit with the same thing at another job(new)I went in with a unsettled mind tense serious.i quit that job as the bullying got very bad. anxiety made me slowly stop doing what I like.because being judged had been woven into my thought pattern.then came depression i have been fighting this by myself for 8 months it's been the hardest thing I've ever done.my partner is not very supportive.i tryed explaining but there was no getting threw.i also lost my licence so I was home bound all summer 6 months was very hard.ive never taken meds and never stopped fighting it.never stopped working and try my hardest to stay active.its been very hard but I'm getting threw it.i told childhood friends and they also didn't understand telling surrounding friends(saying I'm loosing it)I also tried to tell a friend I work with and it was spread threw my new job.witch made me feel betrayed.and even worse.coming to the end of this I'm starting not to care but I don't want to be to Mutch of a a$$hole finding the happy medium.keep fighting it I've found my character is taking a change but the old character was a victim.that was by far hell I'm still not full recoved.but never give up and adapt.i feel for people that have to go threw this. get well people.love you all

tulpa Lonely and angry
  • replies: 9

I've always been lonely but lately I've been getting more and more angry, I feel abandoned by everyone, like a total outcast. I can't make friends and i can barely take care of myself it feels like such an effort just to shower everyday. I know what ... View more

I've always been lonely but lately I've been getting more and more angry, I feel abandoned by everyone, like a total outcast. I can't make friends and i can barely take care of myself it feels like such an effort just to shower everyday. I know what I have to do but it's so hard just to do it, all I do is sit around daydreaming and listening to music. Can't even be bothered to make a doctors appointment even though I need to and I'm still crying almost everyday. I often feel like hitting people or throwing things I used to be so peaceful too.

Indra Why me? The penultimate question
  • replies: 6

I am on this merry-go-round of up and down days, as I am sure a lot can relate with. Today, is one of the low ones. Start with about 4 hours of very broken sleep caused by all living souls in this house including the four legged furball. Next up, my ... View more

I am on this merry-go-round of up and down days, as I am sure a lot can relate with. Today, is one of the low ones. Start with about 4 hours of very broken sleep caused by all living souls in this house including the four legged furball. Next up, my youngest had an appointment with CAMHS which actually went well, but also re - highlighted that the are definite signs of Aspergers - not a shock but still not the best news either. I still have a lot of paranoia/anxiety in regards to my fiancée. There are starting to be signs that he us talking to other women, but he denies this. We haven't been intimate in quite awhile and we have only been together just over a year. I get countless excuses for it and he never wants to discuss it. It makes me feel very low. I have said I am trying to deal with my depression as best I can, his response was that everyone has some sort of depression. Apart from some wonderful people on BB, I really don't have anyone I can talk to. I guess some days are just darker than others....

postagepaid finding ways to enjoy my life again
  • replies: 1

I am 40, been married 8 years, I love my wife although sometimes it is challenging to get along, especially after kids. I have a full time job, two great healthy kids I adore (both boys under 5 ). I exercise regularly, I am fit, actually probably fit... View more

I am 40, been married 8 years, I love my wife although sometimes it is challenging to get along, especially after kids. I have a full time job, two great healthy kids I adore (both boys under 5 ). I exercise regularly, I am fit, actually probably fitter than I have ever been, I drink moderately only socially, have a cigarette every now and then and try to eat well (no junk food save for the bag of chips every once in a while). I don't take drugs. I like my job although it does give me anxiety that I do not have a ongoing gig, rather a contract which runs out in 18 months.My wife is in a "permanent " job. We moved to Australia 3 years ago, for work reasons. I have a small community of friends and colleagues I like. Our household income is good. We live in a nice house. So this all sounds pretty good, right? So how come I cannot seem to enjoy any of it? I feel bad putting it this way, and it makes me very mad that I am such a fortunate person and I cannot find way to enjoy it! That has been bothering me for a while now. I have always been prone to anxiety, since I was much younger, and for a long time I dealt with it, mostly by drinking and going out. I no longer do that as the costs for me are way too high. Since having kids 5 years ago I have been dealing with some generalized level of depression and anxiety and this has had a massive impact on my life, and most of all my marriage. I have tried therapy - at least 4 times - to no avail yet. I am at intervals sad, angry, have no energy, low libido, low self esteem, no concentration etc. Also some self harm (not too serious). I worked very hard through my teens and early 20s to develop a strong sense of confidence and it seems that in the last 5 years this has evaporated and I am going back to a state that I thought was gone - meaning feeling insecure, incompetent, inadequate with body image issues etc..I am always tired... my marriage is falling apart as a result. I have discussed this matter with my wife and I am going to try medication for the first time (have Dr. appointment next week). I don't know what else to say really, except that as the title says I need to find ways to enjoy my life again before it all falls apart, we have worked very hard to be where we are and my mental health is ruining it I think.It's been a long 5 years.

renmon The daily deconstruction and reconstruction of self
  • replies: 3

The labels I have are Major Depressive Disorder with Anxiety Disorder (Post Traumatic Stress). There are quite a few of us walking around with these labels imprinted on us. But what do they mean? I have spent almost three years discussing these label... View more

The labels I have are Major Depressive Disorder with Anxiety Disorder (Post Traumatic Stress). There are quite a few of us walking around with these labels imprinted on us. But what do they mean? I have spent almost three years discussing these labels and the 'feelings' in relation to them and I don't feel I am winning the battle to have myself prioritised over my condition.Yes I have a mental illness. Yes this illness interrupts my life at various times. I have not lost my intelligence - if anything I have gained far greater emotional intelligence and sharpened my intellect through the process of recovery.I'm not sure of the points I want to discuss here or what I really want to say but I am finding all the tools at my disposal to get through the days are not working of late. I have spent six weeks shaking, afraid of noise and light and myself, and I am exhausted. Naturally depression is now taking over.I am still mindfully meditating, limiting my experiences that cause triggers while finely balancing this with an appropriate amount of social interaction and discussing my current state of being with those who will listen. I am exercising most days, eating well, limiting alcohol, keeping to a sleep schedule etc etc This is what I know for sure.There are moments in every single day I feel love and happiness and contentment. I have two wonderful children who so far remain firmly focused in front of any thoughts of suicide I have. Their father is unavailable to them and my parents (who we live with) are unwilling to support us, we have no other family where we live. If I'm not around, I can't imagine where they will end up.I just find it so exhausting to live. Every morning I wake up and immediately go into deconstruction mode. Waging a battle against the part of my mind that wants to take over and unleash the hell that is my mental illness. So once I have that a little bit under control, I go into reconstruction mode. I tell myself the thoughts I need to have and discuss with myself what part of my thinking is logical or illogical. This is for say 30-45 minutes. Then I great my children and start the day. Throughout the day and evening the whole process continues.I can't take medication as I am unable to parent with the side effects. My psychiatrist says I'm trapped between a rock and hard place. We've tried 11 medications and I can't tolerate any of them. It's impossible to live, yet inconceivable to die. I' m scared of what is going to happen to us.

highhopes Just a little bit off the path at the moment
  • replies: 4

Hey all, I'm in my early 30s and i've managed to make a mess of the finances for me and my Fiancee, i've always suffered from Depression since I was young about various things (bullying, not liking going to school, feeling left out). When I have an i... View more

Hey all, I'm in my early 30s and i've managed to make a mess of the finances for me and my Fiancee, i've always suffered from Depression since I was young about various things (bullying, not liking going to school, feeling left out). When I have an idea though, I am extremely passionate and will see it through, even if it makes me mentally sick. Yet at the same time I have no appreciation for anything I have achieved and feel more of a burden on people than a benefit. Yet, people that have met me have always said how nice and polite I am, people always seem to remember me and often speak only good things about me. I am the sort of person that would say "thank you" for everything, because I am extremely grateful for time that people have for me. I would do anything for anyone, i've lent money to friends, and even people I didn't know that well but had a good feeling about it. One friend ran off with some money I lent him but i'm glad they are not involved in my life in any way. I've managed to have 22 cars in 14 years, part of this is my ability to be indecisive but part of it was also for my passion of cars and setting big projects (the fun of fixing up cars), a few of these cars I got sick of rather quickly and sold them at a great loss. To give you an idea, I lost around 20k buying/selling the last 4 cars (each car was purchased under 10k each to give you an idea). As of April the 1st 2015, we had owed 36k which was separated on 2 credit cards and 1 personal loan (all maxed). Me and my fiancee have been miserable working so hard and not seeing a penny of it 3-4 years into full time work. The exact feelings I feel right now are regret (wishing I didn't waste so much money), and utter disappointment in myself that I could get us in this situation. I still feel useless, even though I have the most supportive fiancee in the world, I wish I had saved that money for a house deposit since we are renting. We took a chance last month and put everything I could think of on the market (sold expensive car for a cheap one etc). We managed to lower the debt from 35k down to 17k in just on one month, sounds like a big achievement but I still feel miserable and useless. Just looking at understanding my feelings. I wish I didn't have such hate for myself even though the situation is getting better. I feel there is still sadness inside even after debts paid off. Thanks for your time. I really honestly do appreciate it

Miss-Anne-Throwpy Good help is hard to find
  • replies: 3

Trying again today to get some help. Yesterday was a genuinely a shocker. Never met a Dr so awful. Dr was so inappropriate. I was looking for advice and contacts. I ended up googling the dr and found some other scathing reviews so certain now I am no... View more

Trying again today to get some help. Yesterday was a genuinely a shocker. Never met a Dr so awful. Dr was so inappropriate. I was looking for advice and contacts. I ended up googling the dr and found some other scathing reviews so certain now I am not being over sensitive. I won't name them of course. So today I'm jumping on public transport to travel a couple of hours to see my former Dr. of 10 years. The noise and crowds are not things I'm particularly up to handling right now so feels a little like running the gauntlet. On a positive; I'm doing it. Wish me better outcomes today.

Dalro45 Something wrong with my head
  • replies: 5

I know that I suffer from some sort of depression and anxiety. But I can't make myself go to the doctor. I don't want to be put onto magical happy pills. I just want to be me. Most days I struggle to get out of bed and only do so because I have child... View more

I know that I suffer from some sort of depression and anxiety. But I can't make myself go to the doctor. I don't want to be put onto magical happy pills. I just want to be me. Most days I struggle to get out of bed and only do so because I have children. But there have been some days (just 2) where my son missed a day of school because I crawled out of bed after 9. Worst Mother award goes to me! I don't have a job, despite the fact that I've applied for many entry level positions. My inbox is full of rejection emails from those who bothered to reply to my applications. But the thing is, even if I got an interview, I'd be a nervous wreck. In past interviews I focused so much on my body language and whether I'm giving them enough eye contact or not enough, that I miss their questions and turn into a mumbling fool. At present I am living my 'dream' life. I have a wonderful partner of 7 years and 2 of the best kids I could ever ask for. We live in a nice house on acerage with animals that would make 10 year old me jump for joy. But I don't find any enjoyment in it like I thought I would. I love animals. I volunteered at my local RSPCA thinking it would help with my social anxiety and my need to feel 'helpful'. I went for 5 weeks and stopped. I loved the work, the people were nice, it was a great experience for me. But that little voice in my head convinced me that nobody really liked me and I was more of a hinderance than helpful. And that sucks. So I create mini fantasies in my head of a different life and play them out for a few days until I struggle to find an ending for them. They help in a sense. They put me in a good mood for those few days. But then it's like some sort of devil likes to put things in my path that either remind me of my past fantasy or makes me wish I had that dream life. Example: My latest fantasy was that I was a single vet living in a duplex with my elderly dog and white german shepherd. In my fantasy I would put my elderly dog in a wagon and walk the dogs to the local ice cream place. I would do this every Friday night because I was a loner. A few days later, in real life, I saw an ad for a white german shepherd who needed a single female owner due to behavioural issues. The next day on my newsfeed I saw a post about a man who puts his elder dog in a wagon and takes him for walks. Talk about screwing with your head!

SaraJ My little purge, just need to talk
  • replies: 13

Hello, just need to talk anonomously, thanks for listening. I've been feeling depressed, having a bit of a downward spiral, not suicidal or anything, just spiralling sad, no sure what to do. I keep pulling myself out and have been good for long while... View more

Hello, just need to talk anonomously, thanks for listening. I've been feeling depressed, having a bit of a downward spiral, not suicidal or anything, just spiralling sad, no sure what to do. I keep pulling myself out and have been good for long whiles however not doing so great lately. I think a large part of it has to do with I was finally getting out and connecting with likeminded people in a club I enjoyed being a part of but, a certain high ranking member seems to be insecure and possessive of "his" members and me talking to people he has decided are not to be associated with has landed me in a bad place. Doesn't help he's telling other members lies about things I've never said or done either. There's no other similar clubs in my area and I really miss many of the members which I got along well with. I could come back (although likely excluded from many events) if I decide to do some grovelling and and shut up and not have anything to do with those he doesn't like, haven't been able to bring myself to do it though. Should I? I mean it'd go against my principles and likely be pretty awkward and depressing when all the others are out at social events I won't be allowed to go to at times but at least I'd get out sometimes. I'm a very introverted person who has taught myself to be a "pretend extrovert" since I have to deal with people all day, but to be honest, I often end up exhausted doing this. How do I deal with that? By isolating myself out of work hours so I can recharge. What does that do? It makes me more isolated and basically at work/by myself kind of circle. Little interactions with friends. Most stopped inviting me to anything years ago and fell out of touch. I have no close friends any more. No one I can really talk to. I've never had a partner, I can't let anyone that close. I feel I'll end up alone forever. Certain people seem to insist on pointing that out- ie what's wrong with you. Surely someone would have you? I feel if I were to die, the only side of me people would remember is what I did for a living. Morbid thought I know, but there's so much more to me that no one really sees anymore.

Pounce who has experience with bipolar?
  • replies: 3

My psychologist and gp both suspected that I had bipolar. After waiting two months for a psychiatrist appointment, he has confirmed that he agrees that I have bipolar. Luckily I was in a good mood so I've held it together pretty well. But it's a big ... View more

My psychologist and gp both suspected that I had bipolar. After waiting two months for a psychiatrist appointment, he has confirmed that he agrees that I have bipolar. Luckily I was in a good mood so I've held it together pretty well. But it's a big secret. I've only told one person, who has ptsd, so I knew he would be understanding. But how do I tell others? And who??? And how to deal with this diagnosis? Does anyone here have experience in this area?