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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the chats on this Forum having been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Sam85 What is this that I am feeling?
  • replies: 1

Im very new here and not sure where to start. My usual personality is sarcastic, funny, silly, happy, hardworking and social. Im married to a wonderful man of 10 years and have two daughters. I'm not sure what happened but on Boxing day 2014 I just r... View more

Im very new here and not sure where to start. My usual personality is sarcastic, funny, silly, happy, hardworking and social. Im married to a wonderful man of 10 years and have two daughters. I'm not sure what happened but on Boxing day 2014 I just remember something changing. We were away visiting family interstate and I went from wanting to be there to demanding that we had to go home. I didn't want to be there anymore and felt miserable. I ended up spending the reminder of the holiday in my room either asleep, crying or angry. This was the start. Its now February and nothing has changed. Things I once loved I have lost interest in. I feel so completely and utterly overwhelmed with my responsibilities as a mother and a wife. I feel as though one little thing has to go wrong and it will fester in my head and will make me feel nuts. I am restless at night and have a lot of trouble sleeping. I cry randomly for reasons I cant even verbalize and have withdrawn completely from social situations. Coming up with any excuse to avoid interaction. I get get so nervous about new situations that I make myself feel ill. I have no support from anywhere with my children and am so unappreciated in my life that I feel nothing but resentment towards others. I want to go to bed and do nothing everyday. I used to be able to get up at 5am everyday and go work out. Now its an effort every day to do anything. I have a husband, two daughters, loving family and a best friend. Not one of these people has picked up on any of this as I feel I can still hide this well. Husband does night shift and isn't home much to see and everyone else is so wrapped up in their own problems no one can see me crashing slowly. Im not sure if what I have is depression or if Im just sad. But I need to talk to someone and no one in my circle is ready to hear this. Im scared to go to my GP. I dont want to go and have him tell me its all in my head.

Fritz_Montgomery Sick of the Black Clouds
  • replies: 10

Hi - new to the forum today. One of those days that just is worse than usual. Just feel the need to talk to someone - have suffered for many years - still on medication given up on seeing a counsellor as over the years have done so - on and off - jus... View more

Hi - new to the forum today. One of those days that just is worse than usual. Just feel the need to talk to someone - have suffered for many years - still on medication given up on seeing a counsellor as over the years have done so - on and off - just seemed to make no difference and in the end felt like they only cared if you keep coming back and paying your fee. Some days it would be nice if those around you just took the time to say - How are you? and actually showed some compassion. Feel very alone and pretty much resigned myself to the fact that I can not be helped and my life will always be with black clouds hovering over me Sorry to put this out there - but just needed an outlet to try and get though the rest of the day

globalbizz 55, No Jive And Life's Taking A Dive
  • replies: 6

Hi I'm male, 55, employed in a job I don't particularly like and feel depressed more than I should. Second marriage, with 4 kids 22 - 30 (2 each). I feel empty. I feel as I don't fit. I can be outgoing but in social functions unless I make the move, ... View more

Hi I'm male, 55, employed in a job I don't particularly like and feel depressed more than I should. Second marriage, with 4 kids 22 - 30 (2 each). I feel empty. I feel as I don't fit. I can be outgoing but in social functions unless I make the move, I'm usually left on my own. Even when I am in situations, people tend to leave quickly to find another group. Maybe I'm boring but I do ask mostly about the person I'm talking to. I thought that made people...happy and that they would think I was ok. Sometimes it doesn't feel that way. I am in real estate; now a corporate gig and no longer selling. My colleagues are ok and so are the agents except for a few which I dislike with a passion. There's no room for growth and no prospect to earn more money. Money is a big part of my depression. I have a house in a street I hate because of my neighbours. It's full to the brim with debt because myself and wife blow our credit cards sky high. I can't ever see myself getting out of debt. Servicing the debt takes up the majority of my income. I pay my credit cards then use them to live during the month. It's a vicious cycle. No mun equals no fun. I struggle to do things but sometimes do by loading up the credit card or getting another one of the premise that one day all will be good. It never comes. I'm a Lotto addict at about $80-$100/mth. I'm anxious about no meeting my financial commitments especially where children are concerned. My 2 kids (22 & 28) are prime for engagements, weddings soon and I wont be able to contribute a cent. It depresses me greatly. I've tried extra things to make money. Mostly network marketing and have failed for the last 20 years. Virtually no return. I've tried selling on Amazon,eBay etc - all with no success. My latest brain child is book writing. I'm starting fiction writing after non fiction has earned me $100 in 3 years. My weight is 123kg - about 30 kg overweight. My doctor tells me that I've gained 15kg over the past decade. Ten years ago I lost my Mum having said goodbye to my Dad. I got an inheritance after I sold the family home. Within 18 mths I blew it all; not intentionally but nothing was left. The money I sunk into the house has all gone to credit card debt. I'm lost. I don't know where to turn to. I've hesitated coming here thinking that I'll be sharing and listening to guys with dramas. Broken people can't fix broken people. Am I wrong? Is there REAL help here? Thanks for reading

Annie79 Overthinking and exhausted
  • replies: 1

Not sure where to start. But I have had depressions for 20 years. Been on meds most of that. Problem is I constantly battle negative thoughts and over thinking I am currently going through marriage counseling and this came up My husband was shocked t... View more

Not sure where to start. But I have had depressions for 20 years. Been on meds most of that. Problem is I constantly battle negative thoughts and over thinking I am currently going through marriage counseling and this came up My husband was shocked to hear this I explained that I am constantly thinking and hard for me to switch off so when I can't wind down that's why Not sure why I am posting this but just wanted to say it Not sure what to do

Wizman31 Getting Better, but am I really?
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone. I have been suffering from depression and anxiety for a number of years and in July last year was hospitalised. I have since then been taking my medication religiously, talking to psychologists, psychiatrists putting into practice the co... View more

Hi everyone. I have been suffering from depression and anxiety for a number of years and in July last year was hospitalised. I have since then been taking my medication religiously, talking to psychologists, psychiatrists putting into practice the coping strategies and feel that I am slowly getting better, so why am I having daily thoughts of suicide???These thoughts are stronger now than when I was at my lowest! Please has anyone else had the same?I am booked to see another psych this week.beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

scozzie my life is going down hill and I can no longer find my way back to the top
  • replies: 21

Hi I'm scott I have been falling back in to the hands of depression now for over a year it has slowly gotten worse now it has got a full hold on me atleast 1 in 3 days I'm so badly depressed I just lay in bed pretty much running over my issues time a... View more

Hi I'm scott I have been falling back in to the hands of depression now for over a year it has slowly gotten worse now it has got a full hold on me atleast 1 in 3 days I'm so badly depressed I just lay in bed pretty much running over my issues time and time again and hating my self for how I feel and for letting things get like this. No matter how much time I spend going over my issues I can never find a solution. So storey as short as I can. I have been in a relationship about 8 years have 2 children. But started to no longer love my partner about the time the depression began actuelly started to hate being around her. She changed I changed both our lives were going in different directions we started to not share the same interests. Then I started to have feelings for a good friend who I've known for awhile now like 6 years. Started getting really close she suffers depression I was one of her supports we talk nearly every day some times for 6hrs straight. I started to talk with her about my issues to about my failing relationship mostly. One day I was stupid and told my friend I liked her this nearly cost me our friendship a few months later things came good again with me and her was like I never said it things were good there. But my feelings remained. A few weeks after this My partner went in to my fb and txts and read every thing while I was asleep and at work so we broke up. She moved out after 6 weeks we decided to try and make things work well it's not it's making me depressed and angry and well I am still crazy for this friend of mine 9 months on this is were it gets hard. So this girl and I talk every day still about alot we can talk about nothing and still make each other smile and laugh. A few weeks ago she told me she dreamed about me and her going out some were together and romanticly kissing each other. Now clearly this made things harder for me as I like her. Since then till now just over a month she has gotten really close and touchy feely with me one day it's like she wants to give us ago next she shuts me out puts up a force field I have not told her I still like her. There is alot more but I think you get the idea I'm lost. I want to leave my partner im unhappy but scared to lose my kids and I want to tell this girl I still like her but I'm scared to lose her if she still only wants a friendship. Thanks for reading

fitgirl Just taking it day by day, BPD help
  • replies: 6

Hello to all other posters out there, This is my very first post on beyond blue, and I'm trying this out as an alternative therapy I guess you could say. I personally have suffered with depression since I was around 5 years old, (21 years of depressi... View more

Hello to all other posters out there, This is my very first post on beyond blue, and I'm trying this out as an alternative therapy I guess you could say. I personally have suffered with depression since I was around 5 years old, (21 years of depression) I don't understand a world any differently and I still struggle to get my loved ones to understand what it is I'm going through. For years I've been told to toughen up, get over it, your being a princess, you've lost it, your crazy and the worst "its all in your head you can choose to be happy if you really want to, do you want to?" and sometimes you ask yourself are you really just a crazy person? I feel guilty for having this illness, I feel weak and insecure. Sometimes I find a book or exercise (I do not find exercise takes away depression like they tell you it does I am extremely fit) to be the best escape sometimes other illegal methods are all that can numb the pain. (I'm very aware this does not help in the long run) I personally have been diagnosed with Clinical depression, but recently thinking over my struggles in some length and sending a lot of time researching it seems more of a Borderline Personality Disorder. (waiting to be tested) I'm wondering if anyone else can provide me with their information/ experiences with BPD? and can you have both clinical and BPD? Any insight would be fantastic, honestly I'm trying to keep a positive facade for others but as the years go by its getting harder and harder to keep going forward.

dan092 spending more time depressed than happy
  • replies: 4

Hi beyond blue forums, this is my post and hope i dont sound too pathetic. I have been struggling against depression for over a year now mostly by just burying it down and denying any presence of it. But the last 2 months have completely rocked my me... View more

Hi beyond blue forums, this is my post and hope i dont sound too pathetic. I have been struggling against depression for over a year now mostly by just burying it down and denying any presence of it. But the last 2 months have completely rocked my mental health. Two weeks before christmas i lost my job with a company i loved, which was upsetting but not the end of the world as i could spend more time with family during the holidays. Then mid january i lost my uncle to cancer. He has left behind two young daughters and a devoted wife and it breaks my heart these girls have to continue on without this strong soul by their side. However i really do feel selfish that i mention that this is bothering me as it is those girls who feel the most pain while i sit here complaining online. After the funeral, I was then told by my girlfriend of a year a few days later that she no longer had any feelings for me anymore and had been forcing herself to be with me while i mourned the impending death of a loved one. I was also told on the day that my other uncle had just been diagnosed with throat cancer. It has been two weeks since then and I am reaching the end that i feel i can keep a happy face on. In general, I am a very positive person who can always manage to keep a happy face on. But these last few days have really been hard. I am still out of work and sit up most nights struggling to push out the negative thoughts in my head. I have been forced to move back in with my mother and currently the only friends I have are those that play online playstation with me. I'm not sure what i hoped to acheive by posting on here but in all honesty i truely am struggling to find what I have to offer anymore and am sick and tired of saying to myself that surely these bad times will come to an end soon. I feel like I am just feeling sorry for myself and hoping that someone else might pity me, which makes me feel like a worthless human being.

AlisonM Finally realising this depression is real and is at least ten years old
  • replies: 8

thats it really. Title of this post says it all. It's time to accept that I'm quick to tears. Time to accept that not being able to breathe sometimes is a depression related symptom, not anything else. Time to accept I have to actively shield myself ... View more

thats it really. Title of this post says it all. It's time to accept that I'm quick to tears. Time to accept that not being able to breathe sometimes is a depression related symptom, not anything else. Time to accept I have to actively shield myself from the news sometimes. Time to accept I must just go for a walk on the bad days. Time to accept that I don't know what I want to be when I grow up and to accept that I must have change to feel normal and or excited. I've often felt that I'm better, but I never have been. I've just never honestly been able to accept there's a real problem. Which means I've never been able to appreciate the good days. rambling thoughts. Thanks for "listening"

Brendle I feel tired and weak all the time
  • replies: 3

I'm not sure if it's depression...some people tell me it could be though. I know you're all not necessarily doctors or educated in this but if any of you can help it'd be greatly appreciated: I feel tired and weak all the time. I sweat at the smalles... View more

I'm not sure if it's depression...some people tell me it could be though. I know you're all not necessarily doctors or educated in this but if any of you can help it'd be greatly appreciated: I feel tired and weak all the time. I sweat at the smallest physical exertion. When the day is moderate sunny temperature, I'm sweating and no one else is. When I was younger, I still sweat more than the average person, but not as easily. When I was 20, I used to be able to write songs at the drop of a hat. Now I'm 24 and to even write one line is a struggle. Every time I try to write, I'm tired after 5 minutes and can't go on. It feels like I'm walking around with a rock in my head sometimes, weighing me down. My brain feels clouded. I can't recall words as easily as I used to be able to. I've had this problem for about 2 years now. This morning I woke up and I felt so fatigued and drowsy and clouded I could barely get up. Does anyone know what could be wrong with me?