Hello, so my name is luke, i'm 20. I've never been an extrovert or
enjoyed delvulge my own personal problems. mainly because of trust
issues and well, its not something I really want to put on others. so i
guess i'll cut to the chase. I'm just really...
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Hello, so my name is luke, i'm 20. I've never been an extrovert or
enjoyed delvulge my own personal problems. mainly because of trust
issues and well, its not something I really want to put on others. so i
guess i'll cut to the chase. I'm just really lost in life, it really all
started when i was 16, my older brother ( one of two) had a car accident
while i was on holiday with my family in england. he spent along time in
hospital with brain injuries and its still an ongoing process. the day
we flew back, we quickly moved from our old family home ( situated a
couple hours from the hospital) to somewhere were we could be there for
him. my school was quite good with it all and re enrolled me for the
year later. as i did not want to be away from family and back in that
environment, and by not coming back lost almost all childhood friends. (
small town talking). In the end i dropped out and got myself an
apprenticeship, fully qualified now. a couple months ago my parents
decided there marriage wasn't working, I'm living with my mother now,
who needs the support, she needs someone to remind her on a bad day
lives alright.. she hasn't worked for the last 25 years and the life
change will be difficult. I've never dealt with emotional problems well
at all, and i don't think i've ever worked through my problems. I've
found myself with no friends, and the people that are in my life, i find
cynical dark reason behind all there actions, in the end forcing them
away, or just fading into the background. i've had problems with
substance abuse since i was 15, and find self medicating has slowly made
it all worse, downward spiral that has no exit. A couple months ago i
quit my job to focus on trying to sort the bigger problems in life out
which worked well for the first month or so, really tried kicking bad
habits and tried to enjoy my own company.I find myself alone and
Recently money has become an extra worry as christmas and etc, but i had
planned for all this previously, unforced problems with cars and etc
through that out the door. these thing are just little problems and i
know that but I hate life, theres no fun in life, and i'm so alone, i
try to make friends but i can't even start basic conversation. I'm not
even sure who i am anymore, the moods are so flat and negative in life.
I'm angry and been known to blowup over nothing . This isn't the person
i wanted to be.