dear Chris, do you remember as a young kid trying to ride a bike but always falling off it, well some kids don't want to again that day while others are determined to ride it without the training wheels, well this is similar to having depression.
For days myself I wouldn't try and get on this bike and always ended up inside on my bed crying, ( and I'm not saying this in a detrimental way it's only an example) until I managed to do it when no one else was watching.
Then came my depression, hell it was diabolical, I was a mess, someone who had achieved many things in life, capable of picking up a task and achieving it straight away, with no training, now it's all gone, lost, exactly the same as you are now.
I wanted someone to cuddle up to and to feel their warmth and sincerity, but I didn't find that person, sure there were people who did show affection towards me, but they weren't the one.
I remember years before I had depression and my sister in law was depressed so I rang her through this ordeal, so I naturally thought that she would do the same to me, but no she didn't reciprocate at all, so I lost all confidence with people.
Unfortunately at that stage I never knew of Beyond Blue, nor did I ever have a computer, and boy if only I had.
Chris you can feel the warmth from the girls who reply back to you, they are all affectionate and this radiates through the computer, and us guys well we do the same.
Chris your moods are going to fluctuate, one day feeling with your head just above the water line, while other days you feel as though you're drowning, but you still come up for air, and that's the important part to all of this. Geoff.
