Hi everyone, I'm back.

[Guest_4643]

Hi everyone, mb20lover here. I wasn't sure where to post this.

It's been a while since I was on the forums, so I just wanted to make a post saying that I'm back. However, I'll try my best to limit my time, comments, etc on here.

I won't bother tagging anyone, and I'll try to keep this as my only open thread that I have created.

I've missed everyone I've spoken to on here, and I hope to talk to some new people. I have been using my offline supports - my Psychiatrist, GP, Parent support of course, and a Social Worker. I'm in the process of finding a Psychologist but I'm having no luck.

Anyway, I just wanted to pop in and say hello, and also I hope I haven't upset anyone on the forums or anything like that because nothing was intentional, so I deeply apologise.

An update on me, I recently turned 21, can't do much with COVID though, it's a hard year for everyone unfortunately.

I also have a milestone, an achievement, I've been seeing my Psychiatrist for a year which is the longest I've stayed with a therapist. And I also finally have a GP I feel comfortable with. I'm on different meds that seem to be working a little but I still of course have my moments, but these meds I've been on the longest for out of any of the ones I've tried.

Other than that, please don't feel pressured to comment anyone, although it would be nice to connect with some people, old or new, but like I said that's okay. I just wanted to check in.

If you've read this and made it this far, thank you. Stay safe and take care everyone, as much as possible with the unfortunate COVID circumstances.

Thinking of all the Beyond Blue Mods & Users. I've missed everyone.

- mb20lover.

[blondguy]

Hi Tayla

Thanks for your help on 'Improving the forums' and for being a part of the Beyond Blue family too!

Mark mentioned "You are not dumb at all Tayla.You are a very intelligent young lady" Mark and Croix have provided super support above through their own experiences.

Just keeping my post brief....It took me 10+ years to understand that the frequency of my appointments were the key to my own recovery from anxiety/depression. I know you are a proactive (and smart) person that is doing her best...and good on you for having the determination to heal

Just for your info Tayla,...I have been seeing my GP every 4-8 weeks for a 'fine tune' for about 25 years. I take a low dose of SSRI's and a benzodiazepine when required which I resisted for a long time. Best decision I have ever made 🙂

any questions are always welcome Tayla!

my kind thoughts always...Paul

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hey Tayla

Thanks for liking the pic of my dog (on another thread). Hasn't she got a lovely smile? I hope it cheers you a little when you see it.

I know what you mean about struggling between appointments. I think it's really great that you're working on your thinking. By that I mean "not worrying about people who aren't worried about you". There's lots of ways we can try and modify our thinking to give ourselves some more peace - so good on you. I'm wondering if your psych gives you "homework" to do between appointments? My psych does. Usually just small things that can be helpful.

I also just want to agree with what others here have said - you're intelligent and proactive, and you're lovely at offering support to others here.

Big hugs, Katy

[Guest_4643]

Hello Croix, Paul and Katy, nice to see you all here. Sorry I'm just replying to you all now.

Croix - Yes you're right that it is too long. I have to see my GP and Psychiatrist once a month. I've asked them if I can see them both more, but I can't. I didn't ask in a selfish way, I asked because my Psychiatrist was seeing me every 2 weeks at some point. Then I asked in the last session if that could happen again and he said "sorry Tayla, that's not how I practice." I understand because if others find out, they'll want to see him every 2-3 weeks or whatever also. I feel bad and selfish for asking. I feel like I upset him and I sent an email saying that to the Telehealth company but I didn't get a reply, this was before Christmas. I guess he'll discuss that with me because he usually does. some things are better said in sessions than email. I would rather just see my Psychiatrist instead of somebody else at all or in between sessions. However I was thinking of seeing a different GP if I needed help with meds and/or physical problems (I have a small bunion but its so painful. I've had an X-Ray & tests & tried stuff for it but nothing has helped). My GP wouldn't even write me a referral to the Podiatrist. I'm on the DSP but I would still have to pay $60 everytime I saw them, but I pay $25 at each GP session. It's still on Medicare but i still pay. I don't know what to do. And I apologise again for sounding silly but what do you mean by "you have no pre-agreed means of doing this" or whatever? Sorry.

Paul - I'm not on benzos, but I'm on an SSRI and I have been before, but then I tried other types of antidepressants, I can't remember the family name for them, maybe one was MOI or whatever, I can't remember. I remember the names but not the family.

Katy - yes she has a lovely smile. No I'm not aware that my GP or Psychiatrist give me homework. My Psychiatrist tells me to do things like crosswords for example but thats all I've noticed really. Do you think I could ask perhaps?

Thank you all for the kind words and coming here. It means a lot.

Oh PS, Croix - I've looked at my GP's appointments & I can't even get in before my appointment mid Jan, not even on the phone, sigh. I don't know if I could send a fax or whatever but everytime I seem to do that, it doesn't work. They don't seem to check their emails much at the clinic either.

Maybe I could call and say I'm on antidepressant meds & say my GP & that I need him to contact my Psychiatrist? It's not urgent but idk

[Matchy69]

Hi Tayla I am sorry that your psychiatrist will only see you monthly.I am glad you asked him as this was worrying you.It never hurts to ask you have ever right to ask and am sure you didn't upset him.This time of the year it is always hard to get into see your GP .I had to go to the hospital a couple of years ago when I rung them they said they had no appointments and go to the hospital.
My kids came back today after being with their mothers for a week.The weather forecast is for rain for the next few days so I am not sure what I will do.
Take care,
Mark.

[Guest_4643]

I just realised I forgot to mention that on prescriptions from my Psychiatrist (before I found my current GP, old crappy GPs refused to prescribe me my meds even with notes from him, so he had to send them in the mail or fax them and he's in NSW), have a number on them. However that number has been disconnected, I don't know if it's an old number or not but it's to his private office, I don't know if he's still there. There's a number for the hospital which says community mental health but I don't know if that would work because my Mum has rung up hospitals before for her health issues and asked for someone and she's been told they don't work there so I don't want to look like an idiot. I don't know what to do. I don't even reckon I could talk to my GP on the phone or something, sigh.

Mark - yes it is hard. I understand they need holidays but it's one of the hardest times of year for me, it was last year also. Sorry to hear about you getting no appointments years ago. I can't go to triage because they refuse to help me even with a referral, and they're extremely rude. When the ambulances came for my Mum, I asked them about mental health and they said they take you there because it's the rules, but they said they don't want to take people there because the staff are rude, you get abused by the staff and patients, and many other horrible things.

[Matchy69]

Hi Tayla it must make it hard for you when you have to go through your psychiatrist for scripts.I am not sure why your GP won't give you the scripts.

I here a lot of stories and seen it myself with the hospital mental health and also had experienced it with palative care when my mother was in there.It wasn't good.

Tale care,

Mark.

[Guest_4643]

Hi Mark. Yes it was hard and my Psychiatrist got annoyed, not at me but at the Doctors. The one I see now prescribes them for me, because i told him it's been an issue. I don't know why it was.

I'm sorry to hear about your bad experiences with your Mum. I've seen bad experiences with my Mum in hospital too and a bit myself when I went in for a surgery in 2018 (only time I've been a hospital patient).

How are you today?

[Matchy69]

Hi Tayla I have been ok today just tired.My kids got dropped off earlier and I been helping my daughter set up her fish tank that I bought her for Christmas. I just have to get her fish for it.

I had lovely nursing staff in the ward when I had a stroke a few years ago.The ones I had after my surgery this year were mostly nice but I have seen some really bad ones over the years even when I was the children' hospital years ago their was one cranky old sister nursing there and we use to hate it when she came on duty.

I hope your days been ok today Tayla.

Tale care,

Mark.

[Guest_4643]

Sorry to hear that Mark.

My days are usually the same, just repetitive.

[Matchy69]

Hi Tayla I understand about days being repetitive.It would be ok if they were interesting .It's hard when you don't feel like doing much.