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Worst Joke Wednesday

Neil_1
Community Member

Hi all

I know a while back there was a thread with some jokes on it - just to try and lighten the load for folk and to provide a few jolly japes and spiffy spifferoons (those words etched in my memory bank from the late and great Kenny Everitt).  However, I was far to lazy to try and find the other thread, so thought I'd start up a new one WJW.

Here we go people, something to start you off with:

"When I was a small boy, I had a dog named Tax.  I'd open the door and "Income Tax""

"That very same year, I had a bird called Enza.  I'd open the window and "Influenza"

 

Now, they can't be done on any other day - for it is after all, Worst Joke Wednesday.

See if you can beat either of those?

 

1,355 Replies 1,355

What did the quartz say in her wedding vows?

 

I promise I won't take you for granite!

After the rock got divorced why did she leave her job and leave town?

 

Because she wanted to start again with a clean slate.

Why was the beach sad?

Because it had been shingle all its life.

Why did the rock fail the choir audition?

 

Because his voice was too gravelly.

Whatsinaname
Community Member

Why do ducks have feathers?

 

To cover their butt quack

Why did the duck who was working as a GP at the medical clinic lose his medical license?

 

Because he was found guilty of quackery.