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Middle, mature, elderly aged person...lonely & living alone...Needing someone to talk to?..Let’s be here for each other.

Ggrand
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hello Everyone....🤗.

have noticed that a lot of mature aged and elderly people are living alone and overwhelmed by loneliness...I though I would make this thread to give and receive support to each other as well as a place where we could also chat about any thing you want to chat about...so we can all get to know each other...Life’s not as lonely with others to talk to....forum friends can be a big help for us in not feeling so alone...

Share some tips, exercise, gardening, favourite meals, recipes, books your reading, hobbies, what you like doing.....pets and their impact they have in your life....anything at all you feel that would help other people struggle with living alone.💐...and loneliness..

I have a volunteer day..one day a week, which gets me outside of my home and into a different atmosphere where I can talk to the other volunteers and sometimes even customers, when I venture into the shop...Do you volunteer yourself somewhere...

I have 2 little Maltese x Yorkshire..that are my companions, they help me to get out of bed each morning to care for them....when really all I want to do is stay in bed.....

Please feel free to talk about what your interests are or how your traveling right now..

Looking forward to getting to know you...

Grandy..

67 Replies 67

ecomama
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Dear Grandy and a wave to Kitty and all reading. 

 

Massive hugs for you experiencing bullying at school. You know this said a lot more about the bullies than it ever did about you! I was a really rough high school and bullying was rampant. 
I hear you. 
They are not here with us any more. 
You are loved. 
You are safe. 

 

Grandy you've reached a time in your life that you DON'T have to force yourself to do any thing much. 
I really want you to enjoy your fur babies. Feel the LOVE they express to you in all their funny ways. 
BE the gentle soul you are to ALL of us here, and turn it towards yourself. 

 

I've been the luckiest recipient of your love and support!
Seeing any words yours warms my heart and soul. 
You are GRAND indeed lol! 

 

Perhaps you can think of something you do on the regular that takes little effort & thought to do... like feeding your fur babies? 
Maybe cuddling up with them nearby or on your lap and really FEELING that experience. "Lean into" that feeling of love and gratitude (yep I'm doing a Brene lol!).

See if you can bring this feeling into holding your own hands. Rubbing them together. Saying thank you to those amazing hands. Having a cry if you need to. 

 

My BF says thank you to each room as he leaves to travel to the next motel, it's SO CUTE! hahaha. I thought he was crazy BUT I've learnt that his expression of gratitude is amazing. I love that! 

 

Tonight I looked at my ughh bedroom walls, I'm patching from the repairs after demon. I viewed them so differently tonight. I said THANK YOU walls for trying to protect me. THANK YOU for being MY walls! 
Thank you and I will spoil you very soon. 

 

Know that I am grateful for you Grandy, SO MUCH! 
Love EM

 

 

Ggrand
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hello ecomama, mmMeKitty and everyone…….🤗hugs..

 

Thank you so much for your caring replies…

From a young age around 11, I was responsible for my brothers, then my husbands happiness*…and my trying to keep my children happy and safe….so I suppose in a way, I’ve always had some one to look after…or run after…Perhaps, I was…. idk the word to use…maybe I could say “committed” to being their to serve someone……Then all of a sudden….I’m on my own, no one to look after or run after….as weird as this sounds…I miss that, I don’t feel complete without following orders….or doing things for someone else….yet I don’t want that at all….but I am lost without it…..

 

 

 

I honestly feel, that to be worthy of life I must be doing something meaningful and helpful for someone…..but I have no one…just me and I feel doing things for me is meaningless…Idk maybe it’s because I have no one to help me with suggestions, no one to share it with…I know when my husband was doing things constantly for himself….I often thought him greedy in a way….I don’t feel greedy doing things for myself….I just feel so flat and uninterested in doing anything….

 

mmMeKitty, when I had my support worker doing weekly visits it gave me a reason to keep my house clean and tidy….now I am not at all interested in cleaning it daily….I will vacuum once a week….I have vinyl tiles in most of my rooms… a quick sweep every other day with a mop is the most I do….Cleaning can at times,  bring on some triggers for me…

 

I now have a small reptile tank and a big glass bowl…now I’m not sure if I want succulents in the big bowl or maybe I’m thinking a little fairy garden…with a little bridge, little people, little animals, maybe even a little house in their as well…..Oh I can see so clearly what I want to do in my mind…but will my hands be able to create what my vision sees 😁.

 

Okay Im going to do some google searches for best plants to put in a small “fairy” garden might get my enthusiasm up and running…😁

 

I really am so deeply sorry ecomama for what you went through…..and still going through…Hugs dear sweet lady 🤗❤️…..Do you know what colour your going paint your bedroom walls?….I painted my lounge room walls a very soft green…..

 

Kind thoughts, with my love, care and hugs everyone…

Grandy..

 

 

ecomama
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Dearest Grandy, thankyou and me for you too. Love and hugs back. 

 

I appreciate you. 

 

You can see clearly how you were conditioned to serve from a young age. This role continued in to your adulthood. You've definitely "done your work" as Brene would say, by looking back on your life and seeing how things unfolded. Seeing how you fitted in to the circle of family. Possibly where you gained your self worth from? 
A million hugs for the love, energy and commitment you invested into your families. 

 

I can hear the emptiness you feel. 
It seems tangible. 

 

We're here to hold space and listen. 

 

Hugs
Love EM

Fiatlux
Community Member

Hi Grandy and too all other posters,

 

How is the terrarium coming along. I remember my eldest sister had a few of these when we were younger. She had an interest in fish tanks and keeping fish but also caring for indoor plants, like terrariums. Although I loved indoor plants most of them have died on me. I was working very long hours so these were not a priority. I haven't replaced them either. I placed some outdoors under shelter and most survived, but I must not have a great house for indoor plants.

 

I planted some bulbs in tubs this year and most have already flowered. 1 tub which is in a different location is yet to flower. I chose bulbs that do not need to be dug up every year, so long as I keep them dry when dormant. I love fragrant flowers and most bulb flowers are scented. I love lilies.

 

I did achieve something this morning. I am in dire need of a haircut. I sent my hairdresser a message this morning and I am hoping that she can fit me this weekend. I have know her for over 25 years. We have a really good arrangement and she sees me after hours at her home salon. I don't know what I would do without her. She is really the only 'sort of friend' that I have. We don't socialise but she has asked me on coffee dates, which I have had to decline, but we share a lot in common. Our children where all at school together as well. I last spoke to her in May and I haven't had a haircut since February. I can't believe I let it go 6 months. I look a mess. I think as the sun is shining today, I took a good look in the mirror and that got me motivated to fix my hair. This is the longest that I have let it go and boy is it so far gone. Not even a ponytail can fix it. I was thinking of doing something radical, maybe a short bob. That should see me through till December at least.

 

Have a lovely day Grandy and all of who may read this. 😀

Ggrand
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hello Fiatlux , ecomama, mmMeKitty and everyone listening here…🤗.

 

I haven’t really started on the terrarium as yet….I have been looking around for little things I can put in it…I have a small ceramic fishing man, with a fishing line…a small fountain...a frog…and a little Angel so far….It’s been raining here most days and I haven’t really been outside to collect any soil…to start it off….Still unsure of what plants I’ll use….I just hope that at least some of my imagination will end up in the terrarium and not fly out the window 😁..

 

I like bulbs Fiatlux, they are steadier to maintain…I have some Irisis, Daffodils and Lillies…they seem to flower each year without much trouble…also they do produce more bulbs that can be dug up and placed elsewhere in my garden…

 

I can’t do much with my hair…cutting it short is a no go…it frizzes up into what looks like fluff…..I keep it long and wear it in a bun, plaits sometimes at home…at least when I let it out after wearing in a bun plaits it gives my hair a bit of smoothness…until the weather gets damp, humid or rains…then it goes back to a frizzy, fluffy mess😢….I hope you enjoy your haircut on the weekend…and it makes you feel better…

 

I have one friend Betty*…I see mostly at work, she lives only a couple minutes drive from mine..,we used to have coffee together at her place….but I thought it unfair that I was the one always visiting her…maybe I’m wrong but I think sometimes she could visit my place….

 

I am going to give one of my fur girls a haircut this afternoon…her fur is getting so long and it’s getting hard for me to maintain …2 of my dogs have beautiful long fur…it’s okay in the warmer months because it’s not too cold to wash them….I think giving my dog a haircut will be about all I will do today….it takes me a couple of hours to do it….then a warm bubble bath for her….Tomorrow will be her mumma’s turn…

 

Really hope you all enjoy your day today….

Big hugs everyone…🤗🤗..and thank you for the beautiful caring people you all are…💕💕.

Grandy..

 

Hey Grandy....hooray it seems I have found you.  I have been gradually finding all my old friends but this is the first time I've found a recent one of yours to reply to.  Nothing much to say except to make contact and was wondering how you are.  You seem quite comfortable with navigating the new Forum so that's great.  I was very frustrated and upset there for a while. anyway, lovely to write to you again.  I hope you get this.  I will try and keep in touch....love Moon S xx

Ggrand
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hello Dear Moon…and everyone….🤗..

 

Oh Moon, I had so many tears trying to work out the new forums…I mostly know how to get to threads by way of the search button..,,I have written down all the threads names of my beautiful friends here on BB..,but not yours as yet, because I forget your thread title, so I searched Moonstruck and found your thread title…now safely written down in my special little note book.😁….

 

I bought some moulding plaster from work today….surprising what comes into the store…anyway..I am going to try my hands at making a few dinosaur casts….I have a biscuit or cake tray…those silicone ones and I’m going to try to make some then paint them…then I don’t know what I’ll do with them 🤣…doing it more out of curiosity of how they will turn out…

 


I have finished the smaller terrarium, and I think it looks nice…I have a little fisherman holding his fishing line  over a small bowl which has an eagle moulded on top of it…a few succulents scattered around him and the small bowl….I put dirt down first..and have put pretty colourful marbles on top of the dirt…it does look nice…and right near the fisherman is a smooth grey rock with peace written across it….I added a couple of tiny silk flowers for a bit of colour….I have it placed in my lounge room, so that when the front door is opened it gets some sunshine on it…..

 

I planted my Mulberry bush a few weeks ago….and it’s growing well….hmmm I can’t wait for some mulberries to grow….nothing like fresh mulberries and ice cream on a hot summers night……

 

Sending you all my love, hugs and care…💕🤗🦋..

Grandy..

Fiatlux
Community Member

Hi Grandy,

 

Your terrarium sounds lovely. I remember when these where everywhere. Every market we visited seemed to have these for sale. I know we owned a few over the years. Sadly a fantastic permanent market we would frequent on Sunday's was sold off and turned into a new housing development. 

 

I can't honestly say that I have had fresh mulberries or even seen a mulberry tree. I hope your tree thrives.

 

We don't have room for real fruit trees, but I have a dwarf lemon tree in a tub and I am trying a fruit salad tree. I planted it onto a large wine barrel. It was only planted in Autumn and survived the winter. It's very small at the moment but has blossoms on it. Could be a few years before I get fruit.

 

I may try planting some berries this weekend. Fingers crossed, the weather holds out.

 

Have a lovely week. 

ecomama
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hi Grandy and all the other lovely people reading, 

 

I'm so happy to read you finished your terrarium Grandy! Sounds great. 
Looks like you've got the crafting bug there with plaster dinosaurs lol, let us know how they turn out? 

You're very creative. 

 

Sounds like I fell into the BB Gardening Thread again here reading about FRUIT TREES. 
Wow you planted a Mulberry! 
I'm so happy for you. Fresh mulberries are yummy. 

We have a Mulberry tree. Somehow we have another one growing near the back fence now. Birds? Flood waters taking the berries down there? IDK but it's awesome! 

I love making Berry Crumble if any make it to the kitchen. You can freeze Mulberries for use in crumble later. 
I think it's about time that time of the year here that our Mulberry is fruiting. I'll have a check in the morning before work, when I get down there to feed the chickens! 

 

Hope everyone enjoys their week, I love reading about your adventures everyone. 
Love EMxxxx

mmMekitty
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

😺Lovely Grandy, I think your small terrarium sounds gorgeous. I like the succulent plants, their structured forms, the shape of the leaves, the colours. I especially likee the fisherman & the rock with 'peace' written on it.

 

Great idea with the plaster dinosaurs. Please let us know how they work out? Will you be able to paint them?

 

We had a mulberry tree, too. They are great tree-climbing trees - though I don't expect I could do much of that anymore, I'd try for the reward of mulberries. 😺Or, if you have them, I'm sure the grandkids would enjoy fetching down some for you. (Maybe not expect too many to arrive in your kitchen. 😸) I'd even risk their limbs for mulberries!

 

Hi Moon! So glad you found Grandy here.

That's a good idea Grandy has too, to have a list you can add the correct spelling (including letters that are capitalized) of the people you want to find again, using the Search 🔍function, for example, enter 'Ggrand' in the space up there to find Grandy.

You can also note the exact name of any Discussion too, like this one, & search for it there, also.

 Have you ever had mulberries, Moon?

❤️s for everyone

mmMekitty