Does anyone else ever feel like the thought of a normal life is impossible?

[ci]

Haven't been on here for awhile trying to focus on changing my life getting my ocd undercontrol.

Today it seems like I've bitten off more than I can chew. So overwhelmed by everything I've gone back to studying this year in my mid 30 with 3 kids and a business to run. Travelling back and forth to uni I so worried I can't do this. I'm not sure if I should quite and accept that I can only have a simple life and stay home where it's safe and easier to get through the day?

Sorry to vent on here but don't want to disappoint my family by telling them I'm not strong enough!

Does anyone else feel like this?

[lookingforme]

Hi Ci,

I'm glad that you are communicating with your husband, and you are finding the good in all the stress.

From my experience, if the determination is still there, you will find a way. So hold on to that determination. Remember, if you do it part time or put it aside for now, it isn't the same as quitting, it just means you don't think it's the right time. I know you were battling with this concept or thinking yourself potentially weak. I wonder if this thinking has shifted?

Oh, I haven't been too great to be honest.

[ci]

Thanks lookingforme.

Hope things are better for you today it's a Rollercoaster believe me I know.

Anything you need to vent about?

[lookingforme]

Hi Ci,

I've written in another thread that I started called "If I were honest" It's sort of all there already...the energy isn't there to write it again, sorry.

I'm walking a line of panic and lethargy at the moment, I realized I have an assignment due next week and have not covered the topics to do it. I'm trying to tackle it 10 minutes at a time. More manageable than an hour at a time. Not sure how much I'm absorbing though. Will worry about it when it's officially May.

[lookingforme]

Thank you for asking

[blondguy]

Hey CI

It maybe not much help as I am on the same rollercoaster ride as you are ci....but I have never met a person (or a couple) with a 'normal' life. The most successful and happy people I know bury their problems under the rug so to speak.....until their 'normal' life is exposed to the people that they fear the most.......their peer group/friends..

I do wish to have a 'normal' life but I just cant acknowledge the word 'normal'

Interesting and great topic though ci 🙂

Paul

[ci]

Lookingforme I hope your doing better today!

[ci]

Hi Paul thanks and your right about the word normal.

I wish I used the word functional I think it sums it up better. No one is normal but functional is what makes life seem what people perceive as normal.

[lookingforme]

Hi Ci,

Thank you. It may be discouraging but better seems a bit beyond my reach at the moment. I'm breaking in some new meds...so we'll see where that gets me. I'm slowly chipping away at my assignment at least.

How are you doing? I agree with you, "functional" seems to be the standard to which we are all held.

[blondguy]

Hey CI

Now that you mention it I also dearly wish I was functional unfortunately I am not so I must really understand where you are coming from ci

Malfunctioning >>>>>>Paul ....seriously

Take care CI...great thread 🙂

[Nadselise]

Hi,

What is normal? All I know is I need more "downtime-being alone" than other people. I am a full time mum, studying, and volunteering with school parents club (treasurer) and now team manager of my boys soccer. To fit that in with household chores, well my mind never stops.

The other day I woke at 5am with the thought someone was going to die. I didn't remember this until later in the day after I'd felt like something terrible was going to happen all day. I did achieve everything I wanted to do that day. Nothing out of the ordinary happened. But I had rumblings in my tummy, don't remember what I ate, concentrating was really hard, and I felt I was seeing everything as a threat, and often words can trigger me.

Days like these are rare. This year I achieved flying to New Zealand for a holiday, because my favourite band was playing there. I hadn't been on a plane for 10 years and I was overstimulated the whole flight, felt nauseous too. The concert was fantastic and I got to meet the 2 members of the band I met back in 1997.

My brain likes to tell me sad stories. It often likes to give me the guilt trip by giving me the thought that "I am a disappointment", "I don't do enough". And they hit me randomly during the day.

I just never give up!