Adverse reactions (panic attacks/severe anxiety) to all antidepressants after long term abuse

[Guest_75952152]

I have successfully used a variety of antidepressants throughout different stages of high stress (mainly post natal). But I recently went through a traumatic separation after 17.5yr marraige. It turns out i have been under narcissistic abuse for a long time, typical... I believed i was the mental abusive one but i was actually being gaslit and manipulated. My husbands lies and cheating and made up stories got me to the end of myself so i tried to separate and then he turned psychotic snd the gsmes strengthened and I was physically assaulted and the police put a no contact advo in place. Throughout this period and still, I continue to attempt meds to cope with it but it doesnt matter what type i try they all end up causing severe panic attacks everyday and it only stops when i stop the meds. I told chat gpt about my experience and it came up with why I was experiencing this...in a nut shell, because my nervous system was in fight/flight for so many years the antidepressants can stimulate these already constant responses. Has anyone else had this kind of experience and did you find something that helped? Anti-anxiety medication helps but is short term and after a few uses my heart starts feeling funny. Without meds I am completely lethargic, anxious and cry every day.

[white knight]

Hi, welcome

Being a victim of narcissistic abuse does that, they make you convinced you are the problem, so being of a wonderful obliging (and possibly controlled) nature, you take it all on board as issues you are responsible for. Once the truth becomes apparent to you the narcissist goes on the attack because they realise you are a wake up to their games.

Now its healing time and your anxiety is a major issue but all is not lost. 

From a medical viewpoint your GP is indeed the one to be guided by. As for lived experience we can guide you as to some steps and the complexities of overcoming anxiety.

I had anxiety back in 1987. I'm 70yo now. I recall all my processes that I had a daily routine for and in 2012 I realised I'd cured myself from anxiety about 95%. A huge achievement. Without typing it all out here is the link for that-

https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/anxiety/anxiety-how-l-eliminated-it/td-p/183873

I have had only one panic attack of which the GP believed was a heart attack (at 31yo). 3 months later with further tests it was proven to not be a heart attack. So I hated the shortness of breath and the pain. Breathing exercises and muscle tensioning exercises are invaluable for this condition. This is your opportunity to commence a routine exercise program and I find it best just before bedtime. I sleep better too. Any poor sleeping patterns might need a sleep study. It was found at my study I had sleep apnea moderate and use a CPAP which has been fantastic.

You will notice some changes early on plus as your past married life becomes more distant you'll slowly improve your life and it might not seem it will but you'll rebound. Then life becomes amazing. Something to live for.

In the meantime distraction is a tool that helps

https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/staying-well/depression-distraction-and-variety/td-p/275790

Once you get accustomed to being distracted you'll cry less as your main interest- hobby or sport etc will occupy your mind more. 

"Wonderful people are more susceptible to being the victim of controlling personalities. But remember- you are the wonderful one..."

Reply anytime, I'm here daily and love to talk more.

TonyWK