The warmest of welcomes to you as you begin your journey of seriously wondering what's going on that's making life feel so impossible.
I've found it actually pays to be full of wonder or let's just call ourselves wonderful 😊. No matter what anyone says, there's a reason for everything. We simply don't tick the way we do for no good reason. Again, it pays to wonder about the reasons for why we struggle at times. Not only are you wonderful, you're reasonable too (someone who understands the need to be able to reason or find reasons).
I wish I could remember his name but I read an article some months back written my a psychology professor who confidently proclaimed 'There's not such thing as a lazy person'. His theory was that although people may appear lazy, there's always a good reason as to why they feel no choice but to laze. He met students who were physically exhausted, mentally exhausted and/or emotionally exhausted. He met students who were trying their hardest to manage past trauma and the exhaustion that can come with that. He met students with ADHD and those who had no structure in life to follow, the kind which would help guide or motivate them. He met a whole variety of students who, for one reason or another, struggled with lack of energy, motivation, focus and more. But the one type of student he never met was a lazy one. All had a reason for why they struggled. He kept an open mind, wondered why they struggled, looked for the reasons and helped guide them to the best of his and their ability. He saw changes in every single student he listened to and helped. He changed their lives.
On the other hand, there are people at the other extreme who will insist 'You just need to try harder' or 'You just need to stop being so lazy' or 'You need to stop overthinking and do something with your life' and all that kind of stuff. None of those pieces of 'advice' involve any plan whatsoever. If your plan is to better understand yourself (how you work, why you struggle in the ways you do, who could be the best and most inspiring guide for you on your path in life etc etc) it's a good thing that you've started seriously wondering. It also pays to better understand and respect our emotions while we try and figure out what they're trying to tell us. I can't help but wonder whether you're feeling some sense of heartbreak when you go to your room and cry. ❤️
