Was this abuse?

[JJ_]

From as young as I can remember my mum would abuse me.

This was from the ages 5-16. (I’m 18 now)

I never really thought it was abuse until recently.. is this not normal ?

she has stopped doing this in the last year because I retaliate and can push back.

She also makes sly remarks at me sometimes over the stupidest things that don’t make me feel too good.

Is this a problem that needs to be spoken about ?

thanks 🙂

[Ggrand]

Hello J.J,

Welcome to the forums,

I can say yes it is abuse definitely... No one has the right to hit another person or put them down with their words...You described a large part of both my childhood and marriage of 38 years...

I also asked that question many times, I knew it was wrong but I just continued to put up with it through a very deep fear, of both my parents and husband.... please speak to your mum and tell her it is not okay to hit, punch, push or verbally abuse you...It is wrong...

My post is short because simply put it is abuse and it’s not okay for it to continue at all.. please seek help from someone you trust...

Kind and caring thoughts..

Grandy..

[baet123]

Hi JJ,

Thanks for sharing your situation with us. What your mother has done in the past is wrong and is considered as abuse and by no means is acceptable. It may have been acceptable in the past but certainly not know as we are more aware on the long lasting emotional consequences children can endure from abusive actions/behaviours.

You have suffered for over a decade and I believe professional help may assist you. It is encouraging that your mother has stopped attacking you despite only because you can push back.

It is your choice whether you decide to tell somebody or notify relevant authorities. This is definitely a problem worth talking about no doubt and shouldn't be "swept under the rug". Her sly marks are also unacceptable and really inappropriate behaviour.

Hope this helped and you deserve better mate.

All the best,

Nick.