Young people

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BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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David_N I’m constantly depressed and feel helpless. I need help/advice
  • replies: 1

Lately, my life has been shaken upside-down and I feel like my world is falling apart. I know this happens to everyone, but my girlfriend of over two years recently dumped me and it’s led to a string of bad events. Out of nowhere, she broke up with m... View more

Lately, my life has been shaken upside-down and I feel like my world is falling apart. I know this happens to everyone, but my girlfriend of over two years recently dumped me and it’s led to a string of bad events. Out of nowhere, she broke up with me the night before one of my exams for the HSC, leaving me feeling unmotivated and severely depressed. I’ve been constantly procrastinating over almost everything, and I’m beginning to despise and feel reluctant to go to work every week. We had a lot of mutual friends, and after the break-up, it has made relationships between them feeling very awkward. I feel like an outcast constantly and can’t make close friends with anybody. I’m sure this kind of thing is familiar to some people, but never in my life have I gone from being so happy and fun to being such a miserable and unmotivated person. Small things have been making me feel worse, such as the possibility of my closest and longest-lasting friend leaving school and losing my wallet etc. I feel completely helpless and find it hard to enjoy anything anymore, and I am in desperate need of advice and ways to cope with such events. I am currently still doing exams for my HSC and I think I’ll do horribly, and I really wanted to go to University to study a certain course, but my results will probably prevent me from doing so. I know it’s a long read, but any help would be greatly appreciated. Thank you for your time.

romantic_thi3f How can you open up for the first time? (Tips - feel free to add!)
  • replies: 1

Hi everyone, So this question has been coming up A LOT and I totally totally get it and I thought it might be helpful to make a thread about it. This is for people who - are scared of opening up and not sure if they want to do it yet - want to open u... View more

Hi everyone, So this question has been coming up A LOT and I totally totally get it and I thought it might be helpful to make a thread about it. This is for people who - are scared of opening up and not sure if they want to do it yet - want to open up for the first time - have opened up and want to share their story For me, opening up was not easy. My parent's never really got it and sadly still kinda don't - I think they're one of those generations that's like 'you're coping fine' (when I wasn't), 'you don't need to see anyone', 'it's not that bad' or 'just smile and don't worry'. I know that I'm not alone in this and if this is what's happening to you that's okay too. I like to think they mean well but they're old foggies and when you're struggling there's no shame in reaching out for help. Anywho, here are some things that I can think of that might be helpful - Find someone that you trust. This might be your parents, maybe a friend or a school counsellor. For me a teacher who I liked was a good step. It doesn't matter who it is - it's good to be able to let things out with someone who does care about you. - If you're afraid of what they might say, that's okay. It's scary. But it's also worth it. You might want to practice it first, write a letter or have someone join you. You could even text or do a PM if that's easier. I also like to open up slowly and see how they react - that way I know whether or not I can trust them with the bigger stuff. - Let them know what you need from them. Do you want them to understand, be patient, help you see a therapist? Give you a bit of slack when you don't feel like talking? People like to know how they can help. - Give them time. If you look a-okay it can be a lot to process that you're not okay! It's normal for people to react in different ways and that's on them and not on you. If someone doesn't respond how you'd like them too, then don't give up. People do care (especially us). I hope this is helpful! Feel free to add to the convo if you'd like to.

sometimesiwanttodisappear Birthday wish
  • replies: 3

On Saturday is my 18th birthday and I think it will be the most lonely. I just don't want to be there on the day. My grandmothers funeral was on my last birthday all I remember is crying my heart out. So this birthday, I suppose is going to be a reme... View more

On Saturday is my 18th birthday and I think it will be the most lonely. I just don't want to be there on the day. My grandmothers funeral was on my last birthday all I remember is crying my heart out. So this birthday, I suppose is going to be a remembrance day for my dead grandmother. Not only that I even saw my grandmother getting resuscitated when she past in the nursing home. I am so lost with out her, not only that I am totally friendless and I that my mother and father neglect me all the time. They are always fighting, they always swear at me an they priorities the television over my voice and how I feel. I am so lost all I have is myself. I feel as this website has given me a small bit of relief. Sometime I just want to disappear.

MarcoRolo Not a Happy Story Need Advice
  • replies: 2

So today 18/10/2018 is the first day of the hsc and today was English Advanced Paper 1 I prepped well got a okayish sleep woke up read some note and went school and was feeling fine until I sat down and just gonna put this out there I try my best not... View more

So today 18/10/2018 is the first day of the hsc and today was English Advanced Paper 1 I prepped well got a okayish sleep woke up read some note and went school and was feeling fine until I sat down and just gonna put this out there I try my best not to let my personal problems be heard by anyone including most family and as soon as I sit down my face begins sweating and I’m reading the questions and I’ve memoried it but i can’t put It on to the paper so I sat in the exam room trying To look normal and trying to do my English Paper and when they collect the papers back I just left my there and left the lady picked it up and literally laughed only because I got 1 page done and I still live with my parents so my mum asked me about the paper and I just said it was all good do I tell her or just leave her out

roversfan I need serious help but I can't bring myself to tell anyone about it
  • replies: 5

I'm in really, really serious trouble with my mental state. I need to talk to someone but I get super anxious whenever I even think about bringing it up. I tried to get up an online chat but I quit half way through the form from simple fear. I don't ... View more

I'm in really, really serious trouble with my mental state. I need to talk to someone but I get super anxious whenever I even think about bringing it up. I tried to get up an online chat but I quit half way through the form from simple fear. I don't know what to do. I need help, please

Life555 Current job.... new job?
  • replies: 2

Hey everyone, So I have been working in a school at a TA for 2 and a bit years. I have had my fair share of tears at work as I care too much majority of the time. Well I guess you can’t care too much idk. I have always struggled with anxiety and will... View more

Hey everyone, So I have been working in a school at a TA for 2 and a bit years. I have had my fair share of tears at work as I care too much majority of the time. Well I guess you can’t care too much idk. I have always struggled with anxiety and will often have times throughout every year where I have a really hard time but seem to magically “get over it”. This year on the other hand has been a constant anxiety and depression. I started seeing this amazing lady who does all these natural therapies. I had so many problems before seeing her but now all it seems to be is my job. So I’m usually okay when I’m there and I just adore the children and want the absolute best for them. I really really care about every single one of them. When I get home it is just awful I constantly cry and judge myself for everything I have done “wrong” compare myself to other staff and just want to be more like them. I feel so stupid and want to know more but can hardly ever bring myself to study. When I do I don’t seem to retain it as I’m probably just too stressed. Anyways I could go on forever but it is really affecting my relationship as majority of the time I’m crying or zombie like and thinking of work. I am compensating leaving at the end of the year as it probably isn’t for me... but at the same time I’m not sure if I should just suck it up. Is it just me or is it the job?? So confused. Thank you to anyone who reads this or comments. Love to you all

igo much needed boy advice x2
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Hi all, I don't know if any of you remember me from my last post 'much needed boy advice' about the boyfriend who was seeing his ex the whole time we were together. Well, Ive been doing well, and Im proud of myself. We'd began to work through our shi... View more

Hi all, I don't know if any of you remember me from my last post 'much needed boy advice' about the boyfriend who was seeing his ex the whole time we were together. Well, Ive been doing well, and Im proud of myself. We'd began to work through our shit whilst making sure him and I focussed on our year 12 whilst making sure we were still there for each other. Well like that was gonna end well tbh. I went to a party where his ex girlfriend was there and rumour spread through the party that they were still seeing each other. I made sure in a mature fashion to pull her aside and question it because i believe it was only fair for me to know what was going on. Anyway she confirmed it was once. Ever since her and I have been talking and she's been really supportive but tonight I questioned him about it and he told me nothing happened, then messaged me telling me he needed to get help from his mum for something. Next minute, i get a message from her telling me that he's messaging her questioning how i know about this time he saw her etc. Anyway he came back and I made him swear on my life that nothing happened. And he did. He swore on my life that he never did anything. Something i believed he would never put at risk for anything. I know thats the stupidest thing but I'm hoping you can understand why that hurts. So we aligned messages, her and i, they met at a specific time on a specific day and I found messages where he disappears for a certain period time and when he comes back I question where he was. In these messages he tells me that his family is 'having a games night', how 'i should be there with him' and that he 'misses me'. I'm heart broken again. Thanks for reading guys xx

Mike_7597 I have no close friends
  • replies: 7

I am 21yrs old and i recently seperated from my girlfriend of 4.5 years 2 months ago. During that time I put all my effort into making the relationship work and didn't prioritise my friendships (I know this was wrong). Since my break-up I have been t... View more

I am 21yrs old and i recently seperated from my girlfriend of 4.5 years 2 months ago. During that time I put all my effort into making the relationship work and didn't prioritise my friendships (I know this was wrong). Since my break-up I have been trying to reconnect with my small group of friends but they are not too interested in catching up and never talk to me unless I message them first. I feel very lonely a lot of the time and I feel like there is no one I can turn too for support. I have been struggling to come to terms with my break-up and it has been made that much harder when my friends don't EVER message me to talk or hang out. I am currently studying at university but despite my best efforts to be friendly I have not made any friends there either. It's frustrating because I'd love to go out and have a good time but I have no one to do anything with. I also suffer with social anxiety to a degree which is why it's been hard for me to reach out. I'm starting to lose hope and I just really need some new friends and people to talk to.

Peanut22 Letter to ex bf
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Me and my ex has been broken up for 2 months now. My ex dumped me because he couldn't handel a relationship due to being to stressed and was facing a mental mealt down. He has high functioning autism plus I was his 1st ever gf so i think his emotions... View more

Me and my ex has been broken up for 2 months now. My ex dumped me because he couldn't handel a relationship due to being to stressed and was facing a mental mealt down. He has high functioning autism plus I was his 1st ever gf so i think his emotions got to much for him. I haven't reach out or spoken to him since he made the decision to end things as i know he need space. since the pain and the raw emotions are going away i want to reach out to him as only as a friend (not to change his mind) One of my good friends gave me a idea to write him a letter to say thank you for the good times and to wish him well ect. I really like that idea as he hates confrontation. But i am scared that a letter might come off to needy ect. Some of my friends have a opinion that you should never contact a ex if they have dumped you as that will come across like you are crazy and you are not respecting their wishes ect. So i am in two minds about it. (Side note he hasn't reached out to me either but he went into complete hiding after the brakeup eg deleting his social media accounts ect) Sorry about the bad gramer also as English is not my 1st language

Rosie19 Feel like I am caught in limbo...
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone, I have posted on this forum before and received some amazing responses that helped me through a difficult time in my life a few years ago when I was living at home and struggling with the overwhelming workload of caring for a family (mot... View more

Hi everyone, I have posted on this forum before and received some amazing responses that helped me through a difficult time in my life a few years ago when I was living at home and struggling with the overwhelming workload of caring for a family (mother, brother, partner) and taking on too much responsibility than necessary. As of this year, I finally moved out with my fiancé (now, husband) and we are really happy together. I began studying my PhD which had been my goal since my first year of University, and late last year I quit a very stressful freelance job that caused me extreme anxiety to the point where I had to see a psychologist to try and manage everything. But last year, I achieved a lot, and I realised I achieved a lot because I was extremely busy. I look back at my diary and see actually how busy I really was, and I am shocked. Because this year is the complete opposite. And I'm not sure how I feel about it. I suppose I feel like I am getting absolutely nothing done even though I am being told by my supervisor that I am...but I think because I was so incredibly busy last year, this year feels like I have become lazy. My husband leaves for work in the morning and many days I am left sitting on the couch at 8:00am thinking 'I have the whole day stretched ahead of me and it absolutely sucks'. So then I don't get any work done! I've always been a procrastinator but I feel like I just can't achieve that balance. I've gone from having people rely on me completely--from running a household of adults, having 2 jobs (one incredibly stressful, sporadic and demanding), exercising whenever I could fit it in (which apparently was a lot because I was fitter even in this most stressful time of my life), and daydreaming about having more free time (ANY free time!)--and now that I have exactly what I asked for (more free time to follow a dream I've had for a long time) I don't do anything at all! It's like I have taken an extended break from life almost to recover from the past however-many-years I have spent being that person--like I have to rediscover who I am, as cliche as that sounds. But some days (like today) I just feel really low and I don't know why. There really is no reason (of course there are always things going on that stress/annoy/upset us) and I feel like every day is rolling into the next uneventfully. Can anyone see what I might be missing in all of this to help pinpoint my feelings? Rosie. X